ObesityHelp

WARNING: some of what I say may sound or be disgusting to some. If so, I apologize. I don’t know why, but I have such a hard time with eating and knowing what to eat that won’t cause me to have diarrhea or oily stools, to the point where I have to call off of work, because of it. I had to call off today, and this is why I am writing this now. I have literally been in the bathroom off and on starting at 1:30am this morning, and it woke me up. I have been in there 5 more times since then, and it is only 8:30am. I knew I would never make it at work today, because my butt and hemorrhoids are so sore right now, that I am lying down while typing this. This is unbelievable. This usually lasts almost all of the day, and I take 2 Imodium after each or every other loose stool. I can go to the bathroom anywhere from 6-8 times in that day. Not to mention it causes my hemorrhoids to emerge and bleed something awful, where I have to use a warm to hot washcloth to somewhat calm them down, as well as take pain medication. I see on the bites, vites, and exercise posts that people can eat a lot of bacon (which I absolutely love, love, love) and some fatty foods, but I don’t seem to be able to. What can I do to stop the diarrhea like stools, frequency of the stools, and the oily stools? I don’t feel normal anymore, and haven’t been feeling that way in a long time. I had my surgery 3 years ago, and I have had the worst time getting my body to adjust to what I eat. I don’t want to go the rest of my life having to eat just chicken or bland foods because of this, or never be able to eat a piece of chocolate again or a slice of cake or a cookie, etc. I am almost to the point where I regret that I ever got this done. I love the fact that I have lost the weight, but my gosh at what cost? Does anyone else have this problem or a problem similar to this? What should I do? I haven’t had a protein shake in years, but I do try to eat as much protein daily, without protein bars or shakes or protein supplements. However, I probably don’t intake as much as I should.  Does protein keep your stools more regular or bind them better?  I really think my eating habits are awful at this point. Some days, I have to make myself eat dinner. Here’s is what is I would say was a daily menu me: First thing in the morning at about 2:30am or so: I have a cup coffee (just switched to decaf) with 3 tsp of sugar and 1tsp of non-dairy cream. 4:30am in the car (work is at 5:00am): Every day I eat at least two eggs, sometimes with 3 pieces of deli ham or turkey bacon   5:15am: I will make a cup of tea (16 oz) when I get to work with 3tsp of sugar 6:00am or 6:30am: I will eat a pack of crackers with cheese (a different type every day)  8:00am or 8:30am: I usually eat 4 pieces of deli meat on two slices of whole wheat bread with mustard and some pretzels (maybe 10-12), or oatmeal with sugar, pad of butter, and cinnamon and some fruit of some kind, or peanut butter and jelly on whole wheat bread and a handful of plan chips or salty chip At about 9:30am or so: this is where I start with this grazing problem that I seem to have. It is usually what I believe is healthy snacking, but who knows? I snack or graze on granola bars, peanuts (small bag), mini cheese rice cakes, etc. I do this until about lunch time, which is at 11:30am 11:30am: I usually eat a tuna sandwich or deli sandwich with a few chips, or a can of soup, or a can of Chef-Boy-Ardee pasta, or leftovers. It definitely varies. 2:30pm or so: cup of coffee made just like the morning cup and maybe a half of sandwich or something or nothing but the coffee. Then I won’t eat really anything until dinner, which varies as well. Sometimes, I don’t eat much dinner at all. I try to make a small plate of whatever I do make (your standard meal of meat and veggies), unless I really like what it is (spaghetti, meatloaf, baked chicken, homemade tortilla pizza), then I may eat a little more of it. I  try not to eat any sweets (chocolate, etc), but I do on occasion when I want a chocolate fix. I will take a bite of some type of chocolate bar, eat a snack size bar, or a peanut chew or something during the week. I do have a habit of eating chips, cheese curls, Funyuns, cheese cracker chips from Special K, etc. but not that much at a time. However, it is on a daily basis, and a handful or so at a time. Such a bad habit. On the weekend, I do allow myself to eat a piece of some sort of cake like substance or cookie, because of how my stomach may react to it during working hours. That is about it for me on a daily basis, and every day. What is going on with me? Can anyone help me? Thank you in advance.