wigging out!

A. Huffnpuff Hiker
on 2/20/12 6:16 pm
I have a surgical date just 4 days from now and I am beginning to panic. I was hoping to have a sleeve gastrectomy but insurance wouldn't pay for it. Surgeons switched to RNY and I am freaking out. Not because of the change in the type of surgery - just having second thoughts overall.
Is this normal - does anyone have regrets? running out of time and I can't believe I am wavering now.

"Everybody needs beauty as well as bread, places to play in and pray in, where nature may heal and give strength to body and soul" - John Muir
on 2/20/12 6:48 pm - freeport, TX
RNY on 08/19/09 with
I love my RNY. I have no regrets. I'm over two years out. I've run into issues with it before but i'd still do it again in a heartbeat. Tho I started with 450 lbs, i'm now down to 189. I've been extremely happy with it. I can and will lose more as it's just a matter of eating low carb and sticking with it for me. I try but honestly I do backslide sometimes. I do better when I don't have a roommate. Honestly she goes and buys me donuts. If I say no thanks she gets so very upset. So I feel guilty and eat them. My fault tho, not hers.

Anyway I did everything possible to occupy my mind before the surgery. I was afraid i'd back out. I've had multiple surgeries and knew it would hurt, and i'm afraid of needles, so I tried to not think about it. Worked for me. I made my decision weeks before the surgery and I kept working forward to get what I knew I needed. I don't regret a second of it.

Tho I did at first. I couldn't eat like I wanted to. I mourned food. I constantly watched food network...lol. Like an alcoholic watching beer.tv....lol.

I am so glad I did it. I am no longer on diabetes meds and I was on two and still didn't get my sugars under control. I am no longer on blood pressure meds and no longer on cholesterol meds.

I am having issues with warfarin and had issues in the past with an antibiotic but made it thru. So glad its in my past.

If you or anyone ever has any questions that you feel I can answer PM me. I'll gladly respond.

I do not regret my RNY. I wouldn't be alive today without it. I was there for my only granchilds birth this past week because of the RNY. There is no way I would have been able to attend the labor and delivery without the surgery.

I haven't had a perfectly easy time with it, but i'm still glad I did it at two years out!!!

Met my first goal, met my second goal, met my surgeons goal. Now I have a new goal!
on 2/20/12 9:18 pm - FL
Same exactly as me. I.freaked out too, with good reason. Two days prior I emailed nurse saying forget it. Lol she called me back explaining how rny is better long term. Thn I came here and u can prob look back for a post of "48hrs cold feet" or similar post. Lol
I felt better after encouragement here, and a huge cry. Lol
I did it 2/15. So far so good.
Driving daughter to school bus day 7: off pain meds .
on 2/20/12 11:51 pm
 Everytime I had doubts I balanced it against my diabetes, varicose veins, joint pain, my size/image, age, and came back to reality.  I really needed help.  I haven't regreted it yet.  Take it day by day and you will do fine.  Adopt a positive attitude and never let the demons in.  
on 2/21/12 3:33 am, edited 2/21/12 3:35 am
RNY on 08/12/11 with
It's completely normal to feel this way so close to your surgery date.

I can tell you that my biggest regret in having RNY was that I waited as long as I did. It is the single best thing I have ever done for myself. This time last year I was 100lbs bigger than I am today, and today I could not be happier.

Try to focus on all the things you have to look forward to in life and don't dwell on the "what ifs" like I did for so many years. It is so worth it!!!
Lisa Jean            
on 2/21/12 5:13 am

I am having surgery in 48 hours and I would be lying if I said I didn't have my moments but what REALLY helps me is going through the boards and reading the posts of the members who are just home from surgery or recently had surgery - that makes me feel better about it - and I actually did think for a flash that I could do it on my own - but 46 years of not doing it on my own tells me other wise.....  I want to live to see my grandkids and enjoy my life - not sit on a couch and get bigger and bigger and feel worse and worse - also read a post I think yesterday about all the reasons to have rny - and everyone of them fit me - I waver between can't wait and oh cr*p what have I done but I know I am doing the right thing and am going to just keep putting one foot in front of the other until I am laying on the gurney and getting the pre surgery ****tail....  I will see you on the other side

 If you are neutral in situations of injustice you have chosen the side of the oppressor ~ Desmond Tutu    
A. Huffnpuff Hiker
on 3/10/12 1:41 am
I just wanted to add one more comment about how your post hit a nerve - in a good way. It is true that I had one more moment of "I can do this by myself" especially because my husband completely believes that. But you are right - I've never lost more than 30 pounds and I am way beyond that now. And like you I want to see my kids get married and chase grandkids. I was really afraid of the "oh crap what have I done" moment but it hasn't hit yet and I don't really think it will.
I hope your surgery went well and when you feel up to it - send a post.

"Everybody needs beauty as well as bread, places to play in and pray in, where nature may heal and give strength to body and soul" - John Muir
Nikia S.
on 2/21/12 7:23 am - Garland, TX
God does everything for a reason!!!!!

Nikia S. ~~My not yet is way better than my right now~~
HW-339 Preop-331 SW-313

Hattie T.
on 2/21/12 9:24 am - Denver, CO
Same thing happened to me, and I, too, freaked out!  While still in the doctor's office I calmed down enough to pray.  What a difference a couple of minutes made!  I felt so much peace.  That sense of peace never left me.  So, if you're a praying person...

Htaylor46     HW 412, SW 386, CW 309, GW 190      
A. Huffnpuff Hiker
on 3/10/12 1:37 am
I want to thank everyone for their support. You kind words really did help alot and I did go through with the surgery. It's too soon to tell but at this point I don't have any regrets. Once I calmed down, said a few prayers and realized (as some of you said) that I haven't been able to to it on my own - it really wasn't too bad.
I am struggling now with the liquid diet but that is just temporary (one week left) and no where near as stress-filled as the pre-surgery meltdown. But there really isn't anyone in my family who knows what I was going through so thank you all again - without you - and places like OH I really would be a mess.

"Everybody needs beauty as well as bread, places to play in and pray in, where nature may heal and give strength to body and soul" - John Muir
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