Hi:

I am wondering how each of you handle stress after VSG and being after at least 6 months out?  I am having lately a lot of stress at my work (being healthcare executive), and thanks a lot to healthcare reform, many executives are quitting their jobs in Los Angeles community clinics arena.  Long story short, I am not here to preach about healthcare reform, but want to know how people handle stress.  Since I cannot find comfort in food any more (well I cannot eat a lot - thank God!), but I found another escape, and I am very shame about it.  I normally very spiritual person, but right now my spiritual tank is low (unfortunately). I am trying to go to church at least twice a week, but my mind is at work all the time.  I know that I need to find another focus than work, but it is very difficult.   

Thanks in advance to everyone.

I am only 3 months post op....and I am a pretty happy go lucky person.

However, if I am stressed about something.......

I go to the shooting range and blow through about 100 rounds.  My favorite is a zombie target.......357 mag makes a big hole.

I am very happy person as well.  I am always saying "Happiness is a choice" but lately it is hard to practice.  Thanks for advise.  I guess I need to try to the shooting range.  I am taking my family to Santa Barbara next week to clear my head and make a decision what I want to do.  I just need to take care of my family and myself right now, I am kinda tired taking care of others.  Hate to say that......

No you are right.  You can't effectively take care of others if you aren't in a good place.  Feel better!

Thanks for the support! I really appreciate it. 

That sounds like a lot of fun

I know when we are stressed out we just feel like vegetating, but force yourself to get some exercise. I like to swim. I joined a gym, and I also like to use the steamroom and sauna. I find I get stresed when I don't go to the gym for a couple of days, so I try to go at least every other day. As a water lover, I also like to take a warm shower to relax. (I also like to go shopping- but I find I am getting a little crazy with that lately- so I am trying to slow that down) The good thing with the sleeve is that  when I want to go back to old habits I physically can't at this point- Thank God!

Thank you RosieSweetie21 for your reply.  I know that I need to do more physical activity.  I actually a member of the local gym.  I drive to work 2.5 hours each way, and often after stress at work, I simply do not have power to do anything.  I know excuses, excuses :-)

I have a very high stress job.  Plus, my extended family can be high stress (not my immediate family, thank God).  I am seeing a therapist as part of this process.  We've worked on some strategies for me when it comes to stress.  It sounds silly, but I've always been bad about keeping things in perspective... bad stuff always feels crushingly suffocating to me... so now I take some deep breaths, zone out for a few seconds or minutes, and have to keep telling myself that it's not as bad as I'm imagining.  Whatever it is, regardless of how bad it is, will pass.  And that stressing and eating isn't going to make it any better or easier.  I have to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes, everyone has some type of stress, and how we chose to react to it determines our ability to recover.  I also have very negative things that run through my head... I tend to be very hard on myself.  So I'm trying to talk nicer to myself.  Get rid of those old thoughts and replace them with something nicer and gentler (and more realistic/accurate!).

Exercise also helps.  Reading helps.  

You just have to find what works best for you.  Easier said than done, I know.  Hang in there!

Thank you Ms. Poker Face for your reply.  I really appreciate it.  Sometimes it is funny that we got new bodies, but still have old brains :-)

 I can so relate to your post!  Also in heal care leadership and aside from the usual stresses, compound with reform, meaningful use, EHRs, blah, blah, blah - work is crazy.   My mom had a stroke two weeks ago and is now in a rehab/nursing home, so I'm there nightly to check on her and then my dad to make sure he's eating, etc.  then my husband and family... Yes stress is high right now.  I find comfort and peace in quiet solitude with music, my Bible, and walking.

Now that I'm losing the weight, I find that food is not an option for me...at all. I talk to a few close friends, listen to Kelly Clarkson, "Stronger (what doesn't kill you makes you...)"  REALLY LOUD sometimes helps!!!

Hang in there.  Reconnect your spiritual side and center your sights on what you can do and manage.  Take a walk.  Deep breath.  Talk to a good friend.  Pray.  One day at a time. 

My mom used to say, " how do you eat an elephant?  One bite at a time.". Not a food analogy, but a stress strategy. All the issues are over-whelming....deal with it one bite at a time. 

Take care of yourself. 

Thank you Daisy_Rose for your reply.  I can see you are in the same boat.  Do not even start me with EHR, I have executive oversight of the project, and we should go live with practice management system by July 1, and electronic health records by December 1 of this year, and we are still in selection mode.  On the top, one of my CEO resigned (I had two), Director of Development resigned, Chief Medical Officer resigned, the Board is fighting among themselves, sometimes (actually very often) I think - Do I really need this? I really need to make decision soon, if I really need this job..... I loved it before tho

 I haven't figured that out yet but I started counseling this past Monday to see if I can.  Being a Baltimore City Paramedic for over 18 years, I too have a very stressful job.  Running a cardiac arrest scene and the other horrors I have to deal with is mentaly taxing.  Something about walking under the police tape and going to a place where most people never have to see ... ahhhh Baltimore used to be known as The City That Reads.  We call it, the City That Bleeds.

Thank you khessmd for your reply.  I really appreciate it.  I am looking into counseling thru my church.  I hope it will help.

I understand EXACTLY where you're coming from! I'm an RN and my employer just changed over to EPIC in the past month.  Nights @ work are more stressful here lately and just this week I drove through the drive thru twice for breakfast after work! I'm a bonafide stress eater.

So even though I've not had surgery, yet, I am wondering how I'm going to deal with stress when I physically cannot eat amounts like I do now.  What does everyone do? 

Thank you aleach0003 for your reply.  I know exactly what you mean - EHR - this is a monster!!!  You better figure out what you are going to do now and handle stress, do not wait .

I was the biggest stress eater! That was always my way of zoning out of it.

Now, I find myself leaning back to the old ways when I'm stressed.
Thankfully, I've really gotten rid of those things that were stressing me out all the time.

I know that looking back on what stressed me out, I find that it's history. Gone. Doesn't even play a part in todays reality. That all that worry and stress I went through...had absolutly no value. Everything worked out, moved forward, passed. My family is still here, my world is still as valuable to me as it was then.

Things happen in life. Life is a moving, changing thing. Move with it.

Cardio in the morning does help keep me rounded for the day. Endorphines I think.

That old saying "this too shall pass" is very true.

good luck,
donna

Thanks Donna for your reply.  Yeah, it shall pass, and I need to move on.  Just do not have guts to quit this stupid job of mine that I used to like - money is good, but stress level does not worth it.  The family and God is very important to me and I want to focus on them.  Everything should fall into its own places as soon as I find peace of mind.  Hopefully it will be soon.

ThinVoyage,
   Being aware of what you're doing is a good first step.  You didn't say what is is you are doing that is causing you shame, (and you don't have to say what it is!), but please google "transfer addiction" and make sure that's not what you're doing.  It seems to be a problem in our community that some people transfer their food addiction/issues to other things.  Sometimes that other thing is healthy, like exercise, but if it's alcohol or something else *not* healthy, that can be a big problem.

Hugs to you, and hope for a low stress day!

Thanks jaded123 for your reply.  I know that people after VSG could easily transfer one addiction to another.  Thank God that I did not transfer my food addiction to another.  I just tried to find "comfort" in stressful period of my life, and oh boy, did I find one! I did, but it was temporarily, and I so regret I did it.  And yes, it was chemical addiction or fancy word for alcohol.  Thank God that I did it only for a very short period of time (2 weeks).  Going to counseling to my church tonight.  Want to have get rid of this crab before Easter and have cleaner life in the future.