Feeling inadequate...nsv...kinda

We've all been there a one time or another when talking with someone or being in a situation where you just feel inadequate.  I admit  I rarely feel that way...I tend to be fairly self confident....or at least carry the attitude, but every now and then it happens.  Now...80 lbs ago when this happened  my mind always went to "I am fat and this person is a fat people hater!"

Well today I was talking with a group of people (one or 2 not particularly pleasant ) I'm feeling antagonized and my mind went to "I feel inadequate right now...because I am fat!" and then "wait a minute...I am NOT fat...pleasantly plump perhaps" so...my feelings of inadequacy right now have NOTHING to do with being fat".  Lol...I just about walked away in mid conversation to further my self analysis.

So...the point of this is...1) losing weight doesn't resolve all issues and 2) I was having serious complexes about my weight!! More than I realized.

This weight loss/surgery is truly a self discovery journey! 

 

Natalie, that's brilliant.

A real NSV and a great one at that!

It's a heck of a ride. I'm fighting self sabotage everyday. I'm scared to succeed. I always have been, though. Nothing new. It's just rearing its ugly head.

I'm less than 4lbs from goal. Whatever that means. I'm scared of when the journey is over. I've identified with this process for the last year.

Now I'm just skinny Tiff.

Just keep discovering. I regret nothing but it's exhausting also learning so much about yourself lol.

Excellent self evaluation!!