Everybody has an opinion/comment whether you asked for it or not!

I told the person who I report to that I would be off work for a while because I am having WLS. Today during a meeting, she said that I looked like I was doing well with my diet changes and that I probably didn't need surgery. Then her secretary asked what type of surgery I am getting, so I told her. She said I didn't look "big enough" to need that type of surgery. I had another coworker tell me she thought I could "do it on your own, without having the surgery."

Here is why I am a bit pissed off: people who know me know that I have struggled with my weight and dieting since mt late 20's. I lose and then get into a rut and gain it all back plus some. I am an emotional eater and have issues with portion control too. I have some things going on at my job where I am a "one woman show now" for my department because the other tech guy got a job at another school, and they keep heaping the work on. I so want to stuff my mouth with comfort foods and other junk that I know I shouldn't eat. THAT is why I need the restriction that the VSG will give me. THAT is why I have my first appointment tomorrow with a therapist that I hope will be "the one" that I can see on an on-going basis.

I feel so stressed out about my job that I feel like crying and stuffing my face...

Hang in there- you need to take care of you.  Part of me thinks, they don't want to be without your help when you are out- just a thought.  Good luck with counseling.

Nancy

Nancy, you may be right. I didn't think about it in those terms. Thanks!

That's a gross violation of your privacy! Your HR person is bound by confidentiality. And even if you wanted everyone to know, nobody should put their two cents in if they aren't asked. This kind of ignorance makes me so mad. My answer to the naysayers is usually to tell them that 80+% of people who lose weight on their own will gain it all back and then some, while 80+% of people who have surgery will keep it off. 

You might also try saying no at work. They can't expect you to do the job of two people. Tell them they need to hire someone to replace the guy who left or things won't get done.

People suck. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this sort of thing.

Thank you GreenSleeved. Good points about the success and failures with and without the surgery. I have to get the mindset that everything can't be done in a day, do what I can and leave the rest for tomorrow... I am going to need more than 50 minutrs with the therapist tomorrow hahaha. Take care.

I think a lot of people have the misconception that one has to be really, really overweight to consider weight loss surgery.  There are so many people who are "only" 100 pounds overweight that it almost looks normal. I got that comment a lot too, even from the dietician. I weighed 220 at only 5'3". I was definitely big enough and am so glad I went through with it. So far in 9 weeks I have lost 35 lbs.

LessOfMe, I think you are right about that. I weighed 268 when starting this journey and I am 5'2", but I am solid looking so I don't think people realize how much I truly do weigh.

35 pounds in 9 weeks is amazing! Can't wait to get on the losers bench with you :)

I have had someone point this out to me so I have no idea if it fits with your situation or not.  But, I had someone say to me, "you don't need surgery, you're in pretty good shape, if you want to lose, I think you can do it the normal way."  Now, as someone that has had many of the same eating habits and problems that you described, I was a bit miffed.  Then, because I am a rather up-front person, I said, "I am doing this for myself, for my son, for my wife, and for the person who looks both at and back from the mirror."  The woman who I was speaking with said, "I am so sorry, I wasn't trying to be rude.  I just wanted you to know that I think you're a good looking man no matter your size."  Anyways, for those we know and socialize with, I have found that people always feel like those of us with weight issues feel like we need compliments all the time.  So, in her weird way, she was trying to say she believed I was strong enough to accomplish my goals without surgery but that it wasn't necessary for me to be attractive.  Was it her place to say it, hell no.  But, I thought about it and realized it came from a place of friendship and warmth (just not well delivered.)  We all have had to deal with mean words, condescending words, and rude comments but sometimes people are trying to show us support, just in a messed up way.  I am sorry that you went through that but the only person you have to answer too is you.  If you do have it, you will do great:).  

Thank you so much for the well wishes. My coworkers were probably trying to give me a bass-ackward comment  I do that myself sometimes and then think "oh jeez! That didn't sound right, should have said it differently".

Good luck on your journey.

You are doing such a good job...Don't let things get in your way...Food is not the answer that's how we got here in the first place.