No one has to tell me what an important lesson I am learning

[V]ictory has a hundred fathers and defeat is an orphan. – John F. Kennedy

People sure do remember when you do something that’s out of line, out of character or just plain dumb. They have a way of letting you know how shocked, surprised or disappointed they are. There are even those times when someone will believe that you committed the error or mindless act just to strike out at them. They may want to berate, scold or chastise you, probably giving very little consideration to how you feel. You are probably beating up on yourself and do not need the help of others. But you get it and that’s how the shame, guilt and anger set in. No matter what you do, you must never lose sight of the fact that it is your lesson. It does not matter what anyone else thinks or believes; you are the one growing and learning. You have nothing to feel guilty, ashamed or angry about, you must be ready for the lesson, otherwise you would not have had the experience. Rather than focusing on what “they” are saying, identify what you have learned and remember how awful it felt to be criticized the next time you start to criticize someone else.  

 No one has to tell me what an important lesson I am learning. – Iyanla Vanzant