What do you want to see and hear from those of us who had wls years ago?  I know when I was new I lived on reading profiles and looking at pictures, and dreaming could that be me.  I suck at keeping my profile current because the whole blogging thing gets old to me really quick. I post pics occasionally, trying to show my transition from before to now.  I try to post on the messageboard every day, offer support and encouragement and honest real feelings about dealing with life after wls, years after.  I allow people who add me as a friend to see my plastics pics.  I have spent the last 7 years transforming myself into the person I always wanted to be, unfortunately it didn't happen when I was 20 years younger, but it is sure as hell fun now.  I love fashion and makeup and hair, its fun to do makeovers and turn yourself into a completely different person. My goal is Jennifer Aniston, if only.  lol

So whats on your mind?  Lets hear from everyone new especially the people who have been lurking and reading and thinking about wls but are still not sure. 

And I am adding a picture of pure beauty I took earlier this spring only because I love nature photography and I love sharing it.

Thanks for posting this, and your willingness to share.

I wonder about the emotional aspect.  I've read that post-op emotions are all over the place.  Will I destroy my marriage because I'm a basket case?

I like food.  Actually, I love food.  And, I know that it is a crutch, a source of comfort, and a steady presence.  I acknowledge that, and am already trying to work through that, and figure out how to turn that around.  I can see where this issue could be a real roadblock for long term success.  I would really like to hear about people's experiences, positive, and negative, on this issue, and any advice.

I worry about what is going to happen 18 months out, when things seem to slow down or stop.  I need to lose 200 lbs.  I do not see it being possible to lose all the weight in that amount of time, so what will it take to get all the way to the goal line?.  And what will it take to maintain?

How do other people handle cooking regular meals for their families?  I know for me that will be a real challenge, especially the first 3 months, while I'm in the liquid and soft stage.

For the long termers, does it ever get easier?  Do you ever get to the point where your eating habits just feel "normal," and don't require forcing yourself to make the right choice?

If you have a strong happy marriage you losing weight will probably only make things better because you will feel better, be able to do more thing and enjoy yourself without thinking about your weight.  It does get more normal years into it, but it does take real dilligence not to regain.  It took me 2.5 years to get to my goal and for the first 4 years it was super easy to maintain.  Then it changed, I remember I was eating the same and started gaining weight.  Ick.  Whats up with that.  The honeymoon was over, I have had to diet to keep myself near my goal, I haven't quite gotten back to 138, I am currently 142.  You just have to adopt a new relationship with food, it can't be the end all be all, I avoid everything that I "like" too much, many things make me sick so I should avoid them but I don't always.  I get blood sugar crashes if I eat too much sweets or carbs.  I have purged them from my world, but occasionally they find there way back in.  I don't have to cook very often, my son is grown and lives on his own, my boyfriend and I are currently dieting which means I eat dinner, greek yogurt with strawberries and a late night snack every day.  I typically don't eat during the day, that is my choice, which works fine for me.  I am saying you have to eat this way, just how I do it.  I treated it all as my second chance at life and refused to fail and still do.  You will have to see what works best for you, and if you catch yourself gaining a little weight, catch yourself before it gets out of hand.  I have jeans that once they get snug I am on a full scale attack on fat.  It's worked so far and I am 7 years and 2 months out, and 47 years old.

Good Luck.

The general rule of thumb seems to be that good marriages get better, and bad marriages end. Communication and therapy are the best things you can do to make your marriage better.

I like food, too. Love it, really. Did pre-op, still do 8.5 years later. Perhaps I love it even more now than I did pre-op, because my DS has freed me from the guilt I used to feel about enjoying good food. I hope you've considered the DS yourself, especially given you have 200 pounds to lose. The DS simply has the very best long-term, maintained weight-loss stats for patients of ANY size, but this is especially ttrue for those of us with a BMI greater than 50. It's also the very best at resolving or prevventing co-morbs like diabetes and high cholesterol.

Post-op, I cook just like I always have. I and my family eat basically the same things---I just focus on the protein and fat portions more than the rest of the family does. And THREE MONTHS on a liquid/soft food stage/ Wow---I when home on pureed foods for 2 weeks, then 'soft' foods for 2 more, then started 'regular' foods at week 5. I don't think I could have made it through 3 months of that without going insane! (*grin*)

My eating habits feel completely normal---I eat protein and fat first, then complex carbs, and lastly simple carbs. As a DSer, I also drink with my meals. The only thing different about my meals is that I toss back a few pills along with my food.

I don't always make the 'right' or 'best' choices---I'm human, and sometimes I give into temptation. But my DS makes this okay, as long as I make wise choices most of the time. It's really freed me from the 'diet' mentality.

 Be yourself.Don't think what other people say's, but if you really not comfortable and that's will makes youmore happy  then just continue and you can do it. Goodluck! :)

I'm almost 4 years out and it has gotten easier mentally for me the past year. Most people say they wish they had done this sooner, but I'm the exception to that rule. I can see how God's plan for me played out exactly as it should have. I am so thankful for everything in my life right now. No regrets.

Laura

 Hi,
I am sure I'm like many here that are just starting this journey I read everything. I have asked a couple of questions but not many, I think its really hard to know how things are going to be for you until you actually go through it. I'm still researching surgeries, i'm actually trying to have the ds surgery done and insurance sure doesnt make it easy to do things out of state!!

I to am in love with food love to eat I think it scares me how I will be mentally after the surgery I know it won't be easy. The two weeks before surgery has to be grueling am sure I'll be bi*chy just hope i get thorugh it.

 I've been married for 36 years in Aug he came to the semiar with me and we have done a lot of talking about it am sure he knows what he is in for! I'm 54 and carry the biggest part of my weight (255 lbs) in my legs and stomach and I know none of my skin is going back where it came from so that also scares me.

I thank all of you here for offering help and advise and letting us know how you felt during the process. When you give advise and answer others questions it too helps me greatly. I like to hear the good and the bad I really want to know what I'm up against.

Thanks again,
Trish

This is all about you, having surgery or not is completely personal, if you want to move forward and end your relationship with food as you know it, you have too to be successful.  Even the DS will not allow you to eat a pint of ice cream a day and keep the weight off.  Believe me if it did I would be in line right now to get one.  That said, are you in love with what food has done to your body?  Because I can assure you I was in love with Ben&Jerry's but not the 283.5lb body it left me with.  You have to come to the point where you say I tried everything, I am sick and tired of being sick and tired and I don't care if I ever eat again I want this weight gone.  Jumping into surgery too soon, before you are really mentally ready to change isn't a good idea, you have to want to succeed and be willing to eat protein forward healthy meals forever.  That said its not like you are being send to a prison camp and can never eat a cookie again, but you can never eat a box of cookies again.  To me wls is a diet that works, now all these years later its more me calling the shots that my re-routed intestines but it does work.  The DS is really gonna let you eat more, especially fats, it is the best choice if you love to eat, but sugar is 100% absorbed so gain is possible with the wrong food choices.  This is for you, the new you, you need to come to peace with your choice and run into it full steam ahead.

Good Luck.

Thank you for the encouragement to us newbies Heidi! I know for me it feels good to know the more experienced members are there for us.
I want to be that swan...only with muscles/abs and able to run a marathon! 

I've noticed so many changes already. I'm actually getting a backbone. I saw how much of a doormat I was, and I'm standing up for myself.
My husband likes it and encourages it, even though we may butt heads, he says he's happy that I speak my mind.
I'm on Optifast, and I just feel like I run out of steam quickly, and that was the most frustrating thing I've encountered. Not being able to keep going. Tears were shed out of pure frustration. But my best friend just told me to think about in a month or two from now and use the frustration as motivation.

This is the hardest thing I've ever done, and I'm not even 1/2 way through...but I will be a stronger woman because of it. Maybe I won't be a swan afterall....more like a tiger

I love the swans too, I would be a swan if I was an animal, they are beautiful and regal and totally protective of their young and mate for life.  Awwwww. 

You are nearly there, the finish line is right before your eyes, your date is fast approaching and everything you do now makes it easier on your body and your surgeon.  It really is a lot about your mental state when you walk into surgery, you have to want this to work more then you ever have wanted anything and when you wake up and you are in a wee bit of pain, (you may come back and yell at me when I said just a wee bit), but really in the scheme of things its a bit of pain for a tremendous reward.  You will have strength and stamina and be excited over the silliest things that people who were never MO would never understand.  When you RUN up a flight of stairs and don't get winded or have to rest of feel like your heart is gonna explode you will understand exactly what I am talking about.  I was beyond thrilled to be able to bend over and put on shoes with buckles without feeling like I was gonna pass out.  Or paint my toes, or sit with my legs up to my chest and not have all this extra body around me.  You feel as light as air, like a feather floating, you will not remember the pain and anguish on your poor body once that pain is gone.  You will begin to just move around freely like you were just reborn.  Seriously you will be set free to be whoever, whatever you want without your body holding you back physically.  Its amazing and empowering, I cheri**** every single day and never forget all those tiny little things I no longer have to consider before I even leave the house in the morning.  I could never forget anything because god forbide I had to get out of the car and walk back in the house and up all those stairs more then once.  Those days are gone, FOREVER!  Yes I said forever, I am in control of my weight now and I WILL NEVER GO BACK.

Good Luck!

Thank you! :)
And when I think "What the hell am I doing?"
I'll keep thinking this:
Nothing hurts more then the pain of regret ;)