Hello, OH community. I've pretty much avoided the forums for the last few days after I hit an unexpected wall with the clinic I'd chosen for bariatric surgery. I was bitter, took it personally, and pretty much had an inner temper tantrum for about 72 hours. I tried to peek in on the forum a couple of times, but I got stuck on the before/after pics each time and just ended up with teary eyes, so closed the browser window because I really thought it was the end of the road for me and WLS.
Long story short, the main WLS gig in town has qualifications in excess of what my insurance requires for surgery, which excluded me. The other WLS practice requires 50% of the surgery cost up front in case insurance doesn't pay, and everyone else in town is retired. Being that Memphis isn't small, I figured that was about it for my options and it would be the same everywhere else. However, I sucked up all the angry energy and tried out Vanderbilt in Nashville, and things are looking up again. The qualifications are in line with Medicare, and I'm impressed with the staff I've spoken to so far. The added expense of having to travel is not going to be easy to manage, but I'm willing to try if it means I can follow through with what I believe is right for me.
That initial rejection I experienced felt like a life sentence and, folks, it really scared me. I didn't realize I'd put all of my eggs into my WLS surgery basket until I suddenly found myself staring down at the floor where all my eggs lay spilled out and broken. I thought I was about to resign myself to feeling and looking like this for the rest of my life, and I wasn't particularly ready to deal with that reality. The momentary loss of hope serves to show when you've placed your hope in the wrong resource. I can hope that surgery will be a useful tool for me, but I need to place the majority of my hope in something more constant than that. For me, (Not preaching. No flames, please.) that hope and trust belongs to God. From the very beginning, I took absolute control of this process and handled it to pieces. Granted, this is my usual M.O., but I've seen in the past where that gets me. Funny thing is, I spilled all my beans to the insurance lady at Vanderbilt talking about qualifications and criteria and CMS and Trailblazer and MACS, et****il she said "let me make this simple for you, here's what you need." So, from here on out I'm going to do my very best to follow the process and trust God for the rest, instead of trying to strongarm my into it and make another mess of it.