Just wondering...Before your WLS how much did you tell people that you worked with? So far I have told the four co-workers I am closest to, but I know there will be questions as to my absence. (I am a curriculum specialist in a very small elementary school in a very small community.) I plan on telling my 11 students (4th & 6th grade reading group) that I am having surgery because they will have to have different teacher for 18 days. (I also have issues with kids thinking they have been abandoned, and I want to reassure my kids that I love them and will be back as soon as possible.) I know my weight loss will be obvious when I come back, so should I just go ahead and tell everyone? Thanks for your advice! PoJo 9 days and counting!

i did- it's not like it won't be evident. i'm not crazy about everone knowing my business, but not ashamed- so it's just better to up front and 'no big deal.'

I told everyone....family... friends...co-workers because it going to be obvious! (spelling is wrong I think...) I told them what surgery I was having and how it was going to be done ...those who asked....anyway I then got asked some stupid questions like why and I was also told "your not that big" ..lol 304 and not big.... please! So finally they all accepted it and wished me luck...now 3 weeks out and 21 lbs down I went to my job yesterday to see them ...I do miss them..lol they said I look so much happier and I am glowing!!! They were all happy for me ....and they saw a difference....( I really don't see it yet still) but that will come I know...

I told my family and close friends. Others, I told them I had to have scar tissue removed from my 2 c-sections, and that I was going to really try to lose weight so I could get a tummy tuck. I told people I was going to a weight loss center (which is true, my after care is at a hospital weight control center) I just tell people I am eating better and exercising more. You may want to tell the kids you are going on vacation rather than surgery so they wont be worried, or that you are going out of town for work. You will get less questions that way. Just make sure the person covering for you knows the story you tell the kids. Good luck

Hi Po Jo, This is something you have to decide. I didn't tell anyone but two co-workers that I was very close to. No one, not even my boss knew about it until 4 weeks before my surgery date. I just said I was having surgery due to health issues. I had a bad feeling that something was going to go wrong and didn't want to deal with the on going questions and concerns. I was afraid the on going questions would have changed my mind. Well things didn't go well and my complications turned into 2 1/2 months off from work. You are right about the weight loss showing when I go back. I will tell everyone when I get back. This was the right decision for me. Good luck in your surgery Take care, Kathy 299/230/130

I told everyone---including a few strangers, LOL---more than they probably wanted to know. (*grin*)

I've told quite a few people at my work that I'm planning to have surgery. It seems like, though, that all of them have negative stories about someone who had the surgery. Recently a patient had a niece who died from complications of WLS (don't know the cir****tances). Part of the reason I want to have the surgery is that I don't want to wind up like one of the patients we have at the nursing home who are MO and have multiple health problems and are only in their late 50s/early 60s.

hi, I told my family. A few close neighbors. I told my kids that I was having surgery and my 9 year old daughter asked what kind and I told her galbladder removed and then I was really going on a good diet. I did not want her to tell all her friends, who would tell their parents and then everyone, everywhere would know. It was in my opinion really none of their business. I only wanted those close to me to know. If people ask how I am losing weight and looking good. I tell them I drasticly (sp?) cut my calories and now am exercising. I am a slow loser. 2 lbs a week so it looks like I am just dieting like normal. I am a private person and don't want everyone to know my business. I also don't like to be the topic of conversation when I am not in the room. Everyone is different. How do you feel about everyone knowing? If you don't care, tell them all. If you are a little like me, keep it to yourself. It really is just your business. Good luck, Karin

Thanks, everyone! At this point, my plans are to tell coworkers and students that I am having surgery. I will not tell the kids the specifics of the surgery, but I do want them to know the truth. So far, the few coworkers who know about me having surgery have not asked "What kind?" My principal asked if it was a matter of life or death. I told him yes. (In my opinion being insulin dependent at 46 is a life-or-death situation. That's what I am trying to avoid.) The four co-workers who know that it is WLS are in total support! They are also very respectful of my privacy and have not told others. I have been working out with a personal trainer this year, so everyone knows that I have been trying to become more physically fit. (Ten years ago I did lose 80 pounds on my own, but, of course, I have gained those pounds back, and then some!) Eating right is a big topic at our school. Seems everyone is following some kind of diet. I guess I will handle the obvious weight loss issue as becoming more and more strict with myself.

I’m with Judith on this one, I told people just passing by. I was so glad to be having WLS I was like a “Born Again Evangelist.” I teach also, but mine are college students. It won’t be obvious but letting people know Up front will keep them from thinking You were being “sneaky” later on. Best Wishes- Dx

I told everyone, and now I wish I had not. I love the new body but get really tired of the dumb comments. I am pretty tired of "educating" those with just morbid curiosity. I hate being introduced with the tag line, "she used to be HUGE and had WLS". I hate being compared to the other 4 people in my dept that have had wls after me. I am tired of " catty " remarks, My food being inspected and being watched to see what I am eating, or if it is enough or too much or am I getting an eating disorder because I am "too careful" about what I eat. If I am losing too much weight, or too fast or too slow or is she gaining??? (NO) etc. If I were doing it again I would just say it is personal and leave it at that. And If you tell one person the story likely will be out anyways.

There have been many people who have posted this same question, and it has always surprised me a little how many did NOT tell people ahead of time (or after). Of course, I understand some of their reasons--it's nobody's business, they didn't want to hear negative comments, etc., etc. But I was (& am) like some who posted above--I never hesitated a min. about telling people. I COULD NOT HAVE CARED LESS if there were some who were negative; I was just so thrilled to be having it. I had researched til I was blue in the face, and I read both the negative & positive. EVERYONE--friends, family, co-workers--was thrilled for me, or at least they had the good grace to "read" my attitude and keep their opinions to themselves if they disagreed! I only had 1 person (a dear cousin of mine who is an RN) who was very open about her negative view of RNY. People who are close to me by relationship or through work all know what a burden my weight has been and have seen me up & down in weight. I try to remember to frequently thank God for everyone who prayed me through the long approval process and surgery! I don't bring my surgery up when in a group--don't want to bore people--but when they ask, I love to answer them; and the dumb questions don't bother me at all! I'm a high school guidance counselor--had hoped to have the surgery back in June, but cir****tances prevented it til end of Aug. Bad timing, but there was no way I was putting it off til Christmas break. My principal & superintendend were very cooperative (obviously, I had sick days I had to use) and were just happy I was able to be at school for the 1st 2 wks., when the guidance office is packed w/ students! But anyway, in a school, there's NOTHING that remains a secret even if I'd wanted it to be!! Jo -48 lbs.

I told my co-workers and whoever wanted to know. I was excited. I'd rather them hear it from me than secondhand. you know how they embelish things. good luck with your surgery. everything will go great! will watch over you! ~ Mary

I told my co-workers and whoever wanted to know. I was excited. I'd rather them hear it from me than secondhand. you know how they embelish things. good luck with your surgery. everything will go great! will watch over you! ~ Mary

Hi Pojo! I tell anyone who will listen, that I had WLS. I would seriously wear a T-shirt that said, "I had gastric bypass surgery!" for that is how much I am an advocate for the surgery. I also understand the people who prefer to be private, though. It really is no ones business what we do with our bodies. It is all up to the individual. My feeling is that if I can tell one person about this surgery and they benefit from it, I think it is great! I have already referred a few people to my surgeon. I would never TELL anyone to have WLS as this is only a choice the person can make, but I do educate when I can. Whatever you decide, whether it be to tell or not to tell, the end result will be the same...you will be on your way to healthier you! As a little side note....I have so many people every day asking me questions about the surgery, what I have lost, what I can eat, etc...it sometimes gets a bit annoying. LOL. I don't mind most of the time, but if I am having some grilled chicken at my desk and someone says, "Oh, you are allowed to have that?" it can be annoying. Then again, I told everyone and I think they are just curious. So I talk and talk and talk about it. I will answer any questions that are asked. Who knows? Maybe they have a relative or friend that would benefit from the knowledge I have shared. Hugs! Denise

I wish I had a dollar for every time someone asked me "can you have that?" or " what can you eat?" " will you ever be able to eat regular food again?" I could pay for my breast and thigh lift and have money left over for clothes too!

Hey, I know I am probably one of the last people to respond to this post, but none the less, I needed to respond. I might be very different than a lot of people. But this is the way that i see it...... I would not feel ashamed of people knowing that you have undergone or are going to have wls. BE PROUD THAT YOU ARE STRONG ENOUGH TO TAKE THE NECESSARY STEPS TO BETTER YOURSELF. Some people just can't do it by themselves, and there is NOTHING wrong with that. Some people might view asking for medical assistance/wls, as a personal failure and therefore would much rather continue the ever going battle with obesity versus getting the required help they need. Maybe some people are in denial. I cannot do it on my own. i have accepted that and have made the choice to ask for help. I am proud that I have stepped up and am now taking the proper action to not only lose weight but better myself emotionally as well. Eating disorders are not just a food issue, but a lot of emotional issues as well. As far as telling people. I have already told people. I am happy to tell people that I am going to undergo wls and that I have started eating better, soon i will start swimming a couple of times a week, I am in therapy to aid in my eating disorders and in a couple of years I am going to be a completely different person. I will be living again instead of just "existing". I know for a fact that I would be much prouder of a person if they told me that they had had wls and all the things they do everyday post op to ensure the happiness of their lives. Than someone who may have had the surgery in secret and struggle with the post op restrictions by themselves in misery of no support. You know? Maybe thats just me, and I am very tired and rambling. lol sorry to have rambled on so much... Carrie