keeping wls private

Hi all! I have decided to keep wls private because I am a fairly private person. My husband is a pastor and I am surrounded by a lot of people with a lot of opinions. I want this to be a positive and encouraging experience for me. My question is, for those that also kept it private was it difficult to keep it private. What did you tell people the first six weeks when you were eating liquid and pureed foods or when you were still healing? I weigh 200 lbs so I don't think it will be too dramatic. I am most concerned about people noticing that I do t eat anything anymore haha. Thanks in advance!

I didn't eat in front of people for quite a while, I drank my shake or had my meal and then had water or tea with me.

If others were eating, I honestly said, "oh, I just ate" and distracted myself with conversation or something else.

I expect in your situation, you could busy yourself with helping others, or cleaning up, or moving from group to group at Church events.  

Sugar free breath mints can keep your mouth busy, too, while you sip.

I didn't tell anyone except my husband and 1 friend before surgery ...... And then told a select few afterwards, more as time went by.

Basically I explained my weight loss by saying that I was eating less and moving more which we're both the abbreviated truth.

Thank you Kath! This is helpful!

It's worth noting that people will gossip about you - especially if you're part of a tight community. So be prepared for that. Also be prepared for how people might think of you of they find out later that you did have surgery. 

Thank you for your honest feedback.

I'm with Gwen on this one.  People will talk about your weight loss and speculate if you had surgery.

If you deny it and eventually the truth comes out, your integrity is gone.  Think about Starr Jones.  Is lying really worth it?

Thank you! I do not want to lie to anyone. This is why I have asked the question of is it possible to keep it private. It seems like those that have been private, have been able to do so without lying. I am hoping because of my lower weight to start, people will not assume wls. . . . we shall see.

It's no ones business if you've had surgery. I have a coworker who asks me every day what I'm doing. She says " you'd tell ME if you'd had something done, wouldn't you?"  Honestly, it's daily or more than once a day. It's a little annoying!  I love her and I'd love to share with her but she's no secret keeper. In fact, she's quite the opposite. I've already had another coworker say "I'm so glad you didn't take the easy way out and have surgery".  That is the mentality that made me decide not to share. Thanks, but ive been unfairly judged a lot because of my weight. I don't feel like explaining or trying to explain this process to people who don't get it!  I'm focusing on my health!!

Ugh! How classless of your co-worker. This is why I am so private. I really feel that with social media today, people over share leading to a blurred line of what is or is not appropriate to ask about someone.

I used to feel like I had to answer questions people asked me but then realized that some of the questions are rude! I basically tell people that I am trying to get healthier by modifying my food and activity levels (which is true) and then, ask them something about themselves as people love to talk about themselves and are easily redirected. You could also add that since you are trying to be successful at this you have decided to only eat at home and not at functions until you are more sure of yourself. Then, tell them how much you appreciate their support in helping you stick to your decision - this way they are less likely to sabotage you. Bring shakes with you to dinners, etc. I worked at a church and you are right - everyone has an opinion and wants to know everything. I like the idea of volunteering to do clean up or serving food to make it less obvious that you aren't eating. I must say I am surprised they are willing to do the surgery. I started at 257 and was told that if I got to 225 pre-op  then, my insurance would deny the surgery as I had to have at least 100 pounds to lose to be eligible but I guess every insurance is different.