The emotional toll of obesity

I Have stopped posting on my open FB about this whole process. I'm sure you have either heard or experienced first hand how people react. I had a girl tell me that it still takes work and it might hurt a lot. Also the one's who have had WLS and told me it almost killed them or that it was too easy for them so I won't succeed long term. Yup...it has all come out at me. I have a close group of friends that are my confidants. They have been very supportive along with my mom. Not even my brother is very supportive...ok not at all supportive. Thats why I have come to really appreciate this site. The honesty about good and bad have helped...so very much! I feel more ready for this every day but there are times...that I don't think I deserve this chance.

I sit here tonight thinking of my wrecked nerves and body. I have been 6' 2" since late 5th grade. Also overweight since then as well. My family grows em big(as one of my late grandma's drs told me). I do not even remember life at a normal weight. I put everyone before me for most of my life. Now that's changed.

BUT...and there is always a but.

There are nights, like tonight, that I feel guilty for that change. Emotional beat downs from not only myself but others out in the world have left scars and some wounds that i'm still working on healing. Many of us have those scars. I know i'm not alone. Thank you to those that share openly about your walk down this path. It does encourage us newbies!

It's time to be selfish and do what you think is best for your health. I'm sorry there are some people who are not supportive or discourage you. :(

Thank you :)

The scars and wounds weren't inflicted overnight, and healing from them will not happen overnight. I'm 2 years out and I think I am still figuring out what the hurts and wounds really are and how to deal with them. The most important thing that you can do is be kind to yourself through this whole process. The more that you beat yourself down, the hard it will be to lift yourself back up again.

Learning to accept and love myself is one of the hardest things I've done, and I'm not even all the way there yet.

it is the hardest thing it seems....acceptance of oneself. I am better than I've been since elementary school. I was able to not stay in the mistakes I made last night and I have moved past it. I know there most likely will be more obstacles but I am ready for them!

thank you!

Oh, I wish I could reach out and give you a hug. I have been overweight my whole life and much of my identity formed itself around being "big". I'm closing in on my year surgiversary and 105 lbs lost so far. I often struggle to recognize myself and am boggled by the difference in how people receive and treat me. I'm telling you this to urge you to take gentle care of yourself. Find a way to truly know that you deserve to be healthy. Be proud of yourself for taking control of your life in such a powerful way--you are the one that will drive your success. In my experience, my own mind has been my biggest obstacle.

ps--I still have only shared my surgery story with four people in my life. I just don't need any negativity, and ultimately it's my business.

I agree! And thank you!

MEL - As much as people WANT to understand, unless they have walked the walked, they CANNOT really understand. It is what it is. They can support you, love you, listen to you...but they can't KNOW, what it is to be obese, etc...unless it happens to them

You say you have always put everyone else FIRST. I totally get that. It is very admirable...but...it is time to put that person in your mirror first. Maybe not FOREVER...but for NOW. The caregiver cannot care for others, until she first cares for herself.

May I ask where, in Texas, you live?

Thank you! I am learning to put myself first, some days are harder than others.

i am in Amarillo :)

A "yankee", huh? I am just south of the Dallas/Ft Worth area. I have been known to take road trips...

You have been warned...