Confession -

Theduffman27
on 2/7/18 8:56 am, edited 2/7/18 11:29 am
VSG on 11/19/14

I like to learn things my way. I like to test the waters. I like to come up with my own conclusions, some based on fact, some based on trial and error.

I got to a point where I felt OH was not of use to me. I did not like the Tough love approach by some. ( it is hard to read the intent of tough love at times) I realized that I did not like the Tough Love because it was speaking my name, the tough love and advice i was reading was what I needed to hear and I walked away from OH, became defiant and I was wrong.

I am back on OH regularly and back to being accountable. The biggest mistake I ever made was to move away from any form of accountability.

Weighing - myself and my portions

Journal - MFP

Participating on OH

Acting like I had this under control and that I was cured and was normal.

This has been an awakening as I now realize that many that give the tough approach are doing it due to experience and have been there and done that, just trying to save others from making the same mistakes and ensuring all maintain the best path to success.

I am glad that I am back and if I pissed any of you off with my previous defiance and disregard..I apologize.

HW - 299 , Consult day weight - 277, Day of surgery - 259, LW - 178, CW - 207

Happiness-is-a-choice
on 2/7/18 9:14 am

I agree with you ... I have felt the same st times thinking something is too harsh. although sure they meant well. I think any time you get a large group you get all types of people and oppinions but the group is a great help and you have to take the best and let it feed your needs and soul. I have gained so much knowledge and support this past year even though I might not have always agreed with what people have written. Living with out support for 9 years (my Hospital did not have any was bad). You will never believe or like 100% what everyone replies. I am careful with my posts. Some days I just read. Take the good with the bad but still great information and positive support.

Theduffman27
on 2/7/18 9:19 am
VSG on 11/19/14

I know I was pissed as I knew what was being said was valid, I just wanted to deny

HW - 299 , Consult day weight - 277, Day of surgery - 259, LW - 178, CW - 207

Gwen M.
on 2/7/18 9:20 am
VSG on 03/13/14

I'm glad you're back having had this realization. It completely resonates with me, I hope it resonates with others too!

I know, for me, when I stop weighing myself every day it's a sign that I need to get my act together. Because I don't weigh when I'm in denial :P

So.. welcome back. Sometimes we have to go through our own phases of stupid to get to where we should be. (And if you interpret this as me calling you stupid, please realize that I'm calling myself stupid too! I'm the QUEEN of going through phases of stupidity before getting my **** together.)

VSG with Dr. Salameh - 3/13/2014
Diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder and started Vyvanse - 7/22/2016
Reconstructive Surgeries with Dr. Michaels - 6/5/2017 (LBL & brachioplasty), 8/14/2017 (UBL & mastopexy), 11/6/2017 (medial leg lift)

Age 41 Height 5'4" HW 319 (1/3/2014) SW 293 (3/13/2014) CW 149 (7/16/2017)
Next Goal 145 - normal BMI | Total Weight Lost 170

TrendWeight | Food Blog (sort of functional) | Journal (down for maintenance)

Theduffman27
on 2/7/18 9:32 am
VSG on 11/19/14

Thanks - I am glad I was able to come to the realization prior to doing too much damage. I am close to where I want to be and am back in control. It is amazing how fast things can spiral when we do not do what is needed for success!

HW - 299 , Consult day weight - 277, Day of surgery - 259, LW - 178, CW - 207

pammieanne
on 2/7/18 9:59 am - OK
RNY on 05/16/16

I have always been that 'must learn from my own stubbornness' type of person... looking back, I regularly apologize to my parents for my teen years! So as you already know, I understand that part.

Today on a neighborhood Facebook group, someone said that they didn't like our little town anymore because of all the negativity on that page. I was quick to defend our little town, even with all of it's quirks, and told that person that they were on a public forum and needed to take the negativity with a grain of salt, and look more towards the positive things we have to offer.

The same holds true here... and you've reminded me of that. Thanks!

While I haven't strayed too much, and luckily for my stubborn self, I had learned so much about carbs and their evilness before ever getting here (which is my main issue with eating healthy), it was easier for me to accept and agree with that, but the truth of time is something no one understands until they've gotten there. The honeymoon phase is so magical, and you are certain you are 'cured'... but it's just not true for the mass population of us, the struggle gets real all over again as time passes by, and it really is wonderful that there are people here that try to pound it into (my) newbie head!

Glad you are back in the seat with us! I really enjoy your input and hearing about your challenges and the things you've conquered on your journey!

Height 5'5" HW 260 SW 251 CW 141.6 (2/27/18)

RNY 5-16-16 Pre-Op 9lbs, M1-18.5lbs, M2-18.1lbs, M3-14.8lbs, M4-10.4lbs, M5-9.2lbs, M6-7lbs, M7-6.2lbs, M8-8.8lbs,M9-7.8lbs, M10-1 lb, M11-.6lbs, M12-4.4lbs

Theduffman27
on 2/7/18 10:15 am
VSG on 11/19/14

Thanks Pam - I always felt we were two peas! LOL

The honeymoon phase is magical and made me very ****y and confident!

HW - 299 , Consult day weight - 277, Day of surgery - 259, LW - 178, CW - 207

Kristi T.
on 2/7/18 10:09 am - MT
VSG on 02/09/16

Good to see you back!

Liz WantsHealthForAll
on 2/7/18 11:33 am - Cape Cod, MA
VSG on 03/28/16

Wouldn't it be great if we could stay in that honeymoon phase forever? Sigh... Its good to see you here and everyone who participates!

one thing to note that I have found is often true: the perception of a reader does not always match the intent of the writer. That is one downside of online vs in-person. BUT the ability to get support at anytime from so many experienced people is absolutely invaluable. I hope I never stray because I truly feel I will lose focus if I do.

Liz 5'3" HW: 219 (BMI 38.8) SW: 185 GW: 125 CW: 115-118 (BMI 20.4-20.9) - TT and facelift 1/11/2017 - Brow and eyelid PS 12/11/2017.

WL: Pre-op: -34 M1: -17 M2: -12 M3: -11 M4: -7 M5: -7 M6: -5.5 M7: -3.3 M8: -3.3 M9: -2.5 UNDER GOAL since 10/12/2016 - in current range since 12/10/2016. Average maintenance calories 1350

Theduffman27
on 2/7/18 11:42 am
VSG on 11/19/14

You are right Liz, perception can be misinterpreted, in the workplace I will often follow up an email with an in person reiteration just to ensure the intent is confirmed....

HW - 299 , Consult day weight - 277, Day of surgery - 259, LW - 178, CW - 207

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