Brother has Pancreatic Cancer

He's 59 and diagnosed in July with a 4mm inoperable tumor on his pancrease.  Things look bleak.  He's not responding to the chemo treatments and now he's down to 110 lbs.  Dr.'s fear that soon he will be too weak to be able to get the chemo and will put him on hospice care.  Does anyone have any suggestions on how to get him to either gain weight or keep it from coming off?  Please help!

Angel, I'm sorry to hear of your brothers health.  Please know that he and your entire family are in my prayers.  As far as getting him to eat, I don't know if I can help in that area or not...  I went through cancer twice along with the chemo and radiation rodeo.  I knew that I had to keep my weight up or they would stop the treatment so I would try to eat 5 to 6 times a day.  I didn't eat my favorite things as I didn't want to "ruin" the love for them but I did go overboard on fattening snacks like ice cream and shakes.  For me, the ice cream treats were like a feel good thing and they also managed to keep my weight on (added a few pounds, in fact).  I also took the anti-nauseau (spelling?) drugs every time I felt the slightest bit of upset stomach.  Staying ahead of the upset stomach feeling helped with my appitite.

Again, my best to your brother and know he is in my prayers.

Katherine

My heart goes out to you and I understand how you feel.  I would try and give him what ever you can get him to eat at all. With the high protein powders it is easier today then it has been in the past.  When my dad was fighting this my mom blended his entire meal for him to eat.  What ever he feels like he wants try it.  There really isn't much more you can do, if he won't try anything it just makes it harder for you.  If the doc calls in hospice I hope you get the help you need with them. I am sorry I don't have any thing more to offer you, just know that I will be thinking of you and your family and praying for them.  God Bless.
Marylin

Angel, I wish I could give you good news but I can't. My husband died November 17th from throat cancer. He was dianosed the first time just after I had my WLS and went thru 3 bouts of it. He had radiation the 1st time. Radiation and chemo the 2nd time taking the risk of his coroid artery busting and him dying instantly. He was dianosed in May with the 3rd bout. They tried chemo but he got a massive infection . All treatment was stopped and he was put into Hospice Care in June.  He weighed 118 lbs at the time from 165lbs. He was 57. He did well for about 2 months . Then he had lots of complications and became bedridden. He would eat for days and totally stop eating. He had trouble swallowing too. We gave him alot of milk shakes with added protein powder. I had a hard time dealing with this statement but all I kept hearing was : "He is not dying because he is not eating, he is not eating because he is dying". Feeding them can also make matters worse for them. I know it is hard for us to understand. I do know know what my husband weighed when he died but I can tell you he was nothing but skin and bones. I took a medical leave of absence from work to care for him. It was one of the hardest things I ever had to do in my life. I would do it over in a minute. My advice to you would to be to spend all the quality time you can with him and take care of yourself too. This will be a very hard time in your life. Prayer will help. Hospice is a very good organization. I want to take early retirement from my job  next year and go to work for them. See you lighter. Joanne

Angel,

I am very sorry to hear this news. My Sons Father passed away with Pancreatic Cancer last year and it appeared his Chemo Treatments speed up the process, however we will never know.
He lost weight very fast, deteriorated extremely rapid, stopped eating, stopped walking, and most of all he couldnt express himself by talking anymore. But He could understand everything. <<<< remember this and make sure you keep talking. especially in the end.

Please understand this, Pancreatic is one of the worse if not the worst cancer out there. My Sons Father ( My Love & best friend & Father of my child) deteriorated so quickly and in a short amount of time he passed away.
My son and I were right by his side praying as we watched him pass.

I encourage you strongly to comfort your brother, light candles, or have warm wash clothes, have spiritual music, talk to him about good times and memories. He may at this time wonder where he will be going after life. Pray with him with your beliefs.

Yes my Sons Father ended up in Hospice for about 6 days only. Hospice was so wonderful and understands the dying process. Sometimes what we think can save the person suffering can be mistaken at the hospitals. Hospice has the dying process down to a "T" They also give you reading material to understand. There may come a point where they cant do anything else.
You have to decide what is better for your brother. I know, we hate to see our loved ones suffer.

As your brother gets worse, stops eating, cant swallow, remember to put the wet little sponges in his mouth. He will love gumming it. Remember to make it as pleasant for him by medication through hospice ( if you get there) or even the doctors. Hospice happens when there is nothing left to do. If he gets to the point of Hospice, please do not worry. They will make him as comfortable as possible.

It will then be more harder on all of you more than your brother at this point. Your brother will go to what they call the stages of dying. Please, go to the membership office or Hospice office at the hospital and ask them for a pamphlet of the dying process.

I hope I hope you all get through this as peacefully as possible.
Blessings to your brother, you and your family. You, your Brother, and your family are in my prayers

Please note: I am not a Doctor, nor do I have the answer for your brothers condition. everyone is different. Please know that I am sharing with you MY real experience.

May I ask you what your brothers behaviors were in life? such as smoking, diabetes, soda drinker... etc...

I just googled this copy and paste info below. Please go to the Hospice office at the Hospital. Every Hospital has one, or membership services and ask for a pamphlet regarding the dying process.
I am not saying what I am posting below is the only right thing out there. I just quickly googled something for you. Please also search for additional information.



Hospice Signs of Dying
The hospice signs of dying are certain indicators that hospice workers use to determine that death is imminent. The actual process of dying is also known as "active dying." Although some family caregivers are uncomfortable acknowledging that the dying process is starting, knowing these signs can help family members to remain calm and keep the dying person comfortable.


Behavior and Mental Status
A person who is actively dying increasingly withdraws from his or her surroundings. The dying person will probably not move or speak very much, if at all. The person will become increasingly unresponsive, and may fall into very deep sleep or even a coma as death approaches. The dying person may hallucinate, seeing things that aren't really there, and may be disoriented and confused. Agitation and restlessness sometimes occur, and doctors can prescribe mild sedatives to reduce anxiety or increase medications for pain.


Breathing
During active dying the rhythm of breathing changes. Long pauses in breathing, from 5 to 30 seconds, alternate with light, rapid breaths. Fluid build-up in the lungs causes breathing to be very noisy with rattling sounds. This noisy breathing is usually not painful for the dying person, but it can be stressful for family members to hear. Light suction of the mouth will not get rid of the noise, but it may make the dying person more comfortable. Doctors can prescribe medications such as atropine to reduce fluid build-up, which may ease the noisy breathing somewhat. Sometimes a gently blowing fan can help make the patient more comfortable, or a humidifier. As the time of death approaches, the jaw moves during each breath and the mouth stays open. When this jaw movement occurs, death is usually only hours away.


Circulation and Body Temperature
In active dying, blood pressure drops dramatically and the pulse becomes both faster and weaker. Feet and hands may feel cool to the touch, and appear mottled, grayish, or pale. Nail beds, lips, and earlobes take on a bluish color as less oxygen circulates through the body. The patient can be kept warm with light sheets and blankets; however, if the person continually throws off sheets and blankets, they may be feeling too warm, even if the feet and hands feel very cool.


Eating, Drinking, and Elimination
A person who is actively dying may show little interest in food or liquids, and may actually refuse any food or drink. Swallowing becomes very difficult as death approaches, and dehydration may set in. Since dryness in the mouth can be uncomfortable, caregivers may use wet swabs or ice chips to keep the dying person's mouth moist. Lip balm prevents and eases painful cracking and dryness. Urine may take on a dark color and will be less as the dying process progresses, and bowel movements may be infrequent or absent. The dying person will probably experience both bowel and bladder incontinence, and caregivers should be careful to keep the skin clean and dry to avoid discomfort for the person who is dying.


Relieving Hospice Signs of Dying
Caregivers should try their hardest to keep the dying person comfortable. If the person refuses food or water, caregivers shouldn't force the issue. Pain medication should be given if the dying person is moaning, grimacing, or is showing other signs of pain. Caregivers need to remain quietly supportive throughout the dying process, and not argue with the dying person if they begin to hallucinate or become confused. Caregivers can talk to the dying person to offer comfort, as he or she may be able to hear even if unable to respond. The room should be quiet and peaceful, and the dying person treated gently and respectfully at all times. A hospice nurse is usually on call around the clock, so caregivers should call if a certain symptom becomes overwhelming or death seems to be very close. It's always okay to ask for help, especially during the process of active dying.



Coping
Seeing the hospice signs of dying may make the approaching loss feel very real and very frightening. Family members may find it very difficult to be present as their loved one dies, and may want the symptoms to stop or the doctor to do everything possible to keep the person alive. The hospice approach to care attempts to give patients as comfortable and peaceful a death as possible, but does not allow for life-prolonging attempts. Be aware that if paramedics are called instead of hospice workers, they may try to resuscitate the dying person. The process of resuscitation can be very violent and uncomfortable, and may only prolong the dying process for hours or days. The best thing to do for the dying person is simply to be present. Hold the dying person's hand, or gently put a comforting hand on the person's shoulder. Talk to your loved one, and tell your loved one how much you care for him or her. If it fits in with your beliefs, pray for the person or with the dying person if they are able. Talk with the dying person about the afterlife if they want you to, and reassure your loved one as much as you are able.

After Death
Keeping vigil with someone who is dying can be exhausting, so caregivers need to remember to care for themselves too. Enlist family members to help with any arrangements, and give everyone time and space to grieve. If it helps, caregivers can share feelings with the hospice social worker, clergy, or family and friends. Grief takes a long time to get through and each person grieves in unique ways. Supporting a loved one as they die is a huge gift to that person, and can be an amazing way to show the dying person how very much you love him or her


You all are in my prayers.
God Bless you all.