Newbie newbie doo where are you, you've got some work to do now!

kirmy
on 1/8/11 6:05 am - BF-Nowhere, United Kingdom
Good advice is always certain to be ignored, but that's no reason not to give it" Agatha Christie.

No shame in joining the January life changing band wagon.  Congratulations newbies for finding your way to the DS forum.  You've just taken your first tentative step towards total life change and if you're like me liberation from a life of fear and shame. 

Here's the disclaimer.  My advice is my own non-compliant meanderings through this process.  I'm not a the greatest DSer by any stretch of the imagination, I sometimes eat loads of **** food, I have only just started keeping an eye on my carbs but despite my own self I'm still losing my excess weight and am almost at goal.  Beyond my wildest imagination...this has worked!

Here are some things that I was taught by the sexy vets here that made a big difference to the quality of my life.

1) Never give up.  If you want this then you will have to struggle for it, with your insurer, with your bank, with your fears, with your families misconceptions, your work mates prejudices etc etc.  This will be a thrilling ride and a difficult one.  That is why it has such meaning to us all.  We are passionate people because we fought hard to be here.

2) It hurts.  The surgery is enormous, understand?  It is complicated and technically challenging for any surgeon.  You must only trust a recognised and experienced surgeon in the DS.  You must NEVER go to some dodgey cheap surgeon you found on the Internet.  Ask the forum and learn learn learn.  We've lost people here from surgical complications.  I know you don't love yourself very much at the moment and I'm betting being at your lowest ebb has bought you here but WE care if your choices kill you.  WE want you to be made of win....like us!

3) There is no excuse that we'll accept for you NOT taking the vitamin regime you need to live.  I take 22 tablets a day just because of my DS.  How does that make you feel? It's a lot isn't it?  Without ingesting the micro-nutrients and minerals from these pills I'll develop life threatening illnesses...imagine getting Beriberi in 2011??? What about scurvy? Protein malnutrition ??  Read up on them.

4) You have to eat 100grams of protein a day.  The doesn't mean 100grams in weight it means the accumulated total in the meat when you take out all the other elements i.e. a chicken breast is usually 24-30grams depending on the size so you have to eat LOADS of meat....mmmmmm meat.

5) Immediately after surgery you're going to have hellish diarrhea.  If you can get some form of sponge on a stick or long handled bum wiping device then bloody well do.  Reaching around is like doing one million sit ups on a bed of nails and seeing you'll be doing it almost hourly for the first few days you'll thank me for that.  Also wet wipes are your friend.  May every car, bathroom and handbag in your possession have a packet.  When you shart Mobil oil from the fat you need to eat to not turn into a lizard  you need a good clean up crew.

6) Your **** is going to smell like a cow that has been dead for seven days in the tropics , siege cannoned into your airconditoning unit smeared in marmite.  You will need to get a good air freshener..fabreeze does an amazing job as too does Nagchampa incense but you need to be able to pass yourself off as a Hari Krishna to burn it in public with impunity.

7) All the above are easily managed if you're not a Muppet.  Yeh you probably would have an easier time with an RNY or a VSG.  Fine go for it.  If you don't struggle with obesity every moment of every day, if you don't constantly gain and lose weight in an ever increasing spiral then you'll be fine! Your RNY pouch will stretch, the malabsorbtion from the RNY will slow right down and unless you watch your calorie intake you will regain weight.  The VSG will stretch (we all have the VSG stomach so we all know this to be true) so unless you need a kick start to lose weight and then have  willpower to keep it off don't bother.  The DS is for people like me who had very poor control around food,  Who gained and lost vast amounts of weight, who dieted almost 11 months out of every year and have been obese since childhood.  I don't want to diet ever again.  Have I had to work at it? Not really to be honest.  Will I have to work at it?

Yeh most likely in another 12 months I'll have to be MUCH more carb conscious and try to adhere to a Atkins style lifestyle if I want to avoid the potential 25% regain.  Still it blows the other surgery out of the water in that department like a game of battleship.  25% of super morbidly obese I can very happily live with.  That will likely make me a size 16-18....I started at a size 30. 

8) You're going to lose a lot of weight and you'll likely have very saggy skin where the fat once was.  This is express weight loss for most of us.  I've lost over 169lbs in weight in 12 months exactly.  That's 169lbs of space gone from my stretched out fat arse skin.  So now.....I'm a wind sock with static cling.  Naked I look like a 90 year old woman, even my vagina looks like a bulldogs jowls.  This surgery won't make you pretty nude.....you'll need other surgery to do that.  Be realistic and realise you're trading one set of issues for another set of body issues.  I actually prefer these body issues to my old ones so I'm happy to have traded up.

9) You're still fat in your head for the rest of your life.  All the **** you put up with, all the compensations you made for crap behavior directed at your crumbling self esteem well you'll have to deal with that.  If your wife/husband is an arsehole you're most likely going to realise this when you're 150lbs lighter and they feel aggrieved that you're not longer pathetic enough to be stepped on.  You might leave them because you don't think being unhappy is what your life is all about anymore.  You might have a loving and wonderful partner and they will delight in your accomplishments and love you through everything.  There is lots to share.

10)  During the first year of weight loss you're going to be a mental ******* as the hormones and e-numbers stored in your melting polar ice cap of fat charge about your body.  If you're a girl your cyst riddled ovaries might just start working again and you'll be cursed with your monthly period again and the psychotic monthly brinkmanship that comes with it.

11)  For ***** sake you haven't stalled 1 month out.  Just ignore your scales until the end of the first month.  You've no idea how stressed out your body is with the huge surgery, the sudden messages of starvation, the huge swelling internally the massive fluid shifts, the hormones shifting about like bats in the belfry.  You're going to yo yo up and down but anywhere up tom 10-15lbs without any rhyme or reason.

12)  The Vets are amazing but don't be shocked if they kick you into touch if you don't research and understand your surgery.  It isn't their responsibility to keep you healthy it is yours!  You need the knowledge to advocate yourself and read the DS board your answers are there already if you look.

13) And finally.  It is all worth it.  Every second of it.  One day you'll look in the mirror and think you look great.  You'll wear a pair of jeans and rather then hide under a big t-shirt you'll want wear something that shows off your shape. The strange and exotic world of self esteem is not only possible its probable.  I love my DS with a passion.  I am happy to share that passion with you.  This is the best thing that ever happened for me and I am thrilled to pay it on. 


            

RIP Mickie aka Happychick.  You will be missed deeply.
worlfree
on 1/8/11 6:10 am - DivaTown, NC
Thank U soooo much for this post..by the way love your avatar...looking good Kirmy!!!
 P.S. made sure I bookmarked

       

 

            

(deactivated member)
on 1/8/11 6:14 am
enthusiastically
beemerbeeper
on 1/8/11 6:14 am - AL
Lovely job Kirmy. Will you promise to repost it every two weeks forever?

~Becky


Heres2anewme
on 1/8/11 6:22 am - TX
Thanks, gorgeous!
Jamille            ~If it's God's will for me, then it will be~
                                            I Being A Mommy!!
                                         
     
(deactivated member)
on 1/8/11 6:25 am
Excellent post! Bookmarked (:
PriscillaY
on 1/8/11 6:38 am - Highland Falls, NY
i am as newbie as they come, and this was very helpful to read. i loved it in fact. thanks for taking your time to pass on advice. this whole thing is very complicated and i am so scared to make a bad decision. its very hard for me seeing as though i'm working with a time limit (my insurance will stop when i reach 26 yrs old, next august) and i am very nervous about the potential of loose skin and my body being a mess. but now that you beautiful people have introduced ds to me, i am almost positive it is the surgery for me. i was so tempted to go the route of rny because i was uninformed. so thank you, i hope i make the right decision and if so i have you great people to thank.
cegj29
on 1/8/11 6:43 am
Thanks so much for all the good info:) Also I would take having a vagina that looks like bulldog jowls anyday over having to suffer with obesity for the rest of my life.
trxxyy
on 1/8/11 7:32 am - Orange County, CA
There is plastics prodecure for that


jewel506
on 1/8/11 7:02 am - Houston, TX
 
Well said, Kirmy!  Informative - and entertaining - as always.  

There are some drawbacks to the DS....as there are with any weight loss surgery...but the positives far outweigh the negatives!!

I will forever be thankful that I stumbled upon the DS.  Someone on another board mentioned they wished they'd known about  the DS first (they had the RNY) - and that prompted me to look into it.  I'd never heard of DS before then.

I am 7 mos out - and LOVE my DS!!!  Sure, there have been days that I wondered what I'd gotten myself in to - but those were few.  Sure, those first few months were tough - but those have passed... and I feel better (and look better) than I have in many, many years!!

I wouldn't trade the quality of my life I have now for nothin'!!

Ya done good, Kirmy.  Thanks for posting this!!!  

Julie

“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” - Plato
Stormy 918 is my Angel         Angel to DarcyMad, MizCharlottekmg9122,  Staceeann dianeys73/Diane Davis
HW 258.5 /SW 250 /GW 140 /CW 125

 

 

 

 

 

 

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