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Whine (H1N3) Influenza
What is whine flu?
Whiney-Ass Influenza (whine flu) is a respiratory disease caused by overworked, grumpy or high maintenance individuals that complain on a regular basis about one thing or another. These individuals spread the whiney-ass flu to other individuals (generally in the work place) by complaining about every little issue or by being a constant negative influence on those around them. Normal mentally, healthy people do not usually get infected with the whine flu, except for those humans in close proximity to each other in the work place, such as cubicles, desks arranged close to each other or persistent standing around at the water cooler or coffee bar. Whine flu viruses have been reported to spread from person-to-person, but in the past, this transmission was limited and not sustained beyond very small groups of people.
Are there human infections with whine flu in the U.S.?
In late March and early April 2009, cases of human infection with whiney-ass influenza viruses were first reported in Southern California and near San Antonio, Texas. Other U.S. states have reported cases of whiney-ass flu infection in humans and cases have been reported internationally as well. An updated case count of confirmed whiney-ass flu infections in the United States is kept at http://www.cdc.gov/whiney-assineflu/investigate.htm
CDC and local and state health agencies are working together to investigate this situation.
Is this whine flu virus contagious?
The CDC has determined that this whiney-ass influenza virus is contagious and is spreading from human to human. However, at this time, it not known how easily the virus spreads between people.
What are the signs and symptoms of whiney flu in people?
The symptoms of whiney-ass flu in people are similar to the symptoms of premenstrual syndrome (PMS) generally found in women. This virus is mostly contained in small groups of individuals that work closely together and constantly complain about every little issue. If you simply try to say, “Hi and good morning” to a co-worker and they grumble or growl back at you with a “what’s good about it”, keep your distance. Chances are they are infected.
How does whine flu spread?
Flu viruses are spread mainly from person to person through constant mental affliction of a negative nature. Sometimes people may become infected by simply listening or sympathizing with and infected person. Normally this is over a period of time when one is subject to the negative moral of others in the work place. It’s the old, “monkey see, monkey do” scenario.
What should I do to keep from getting the whine flu?
First and most important: make sure you get a full nights rest in order to avoid fatigue. Try to stay in good general health. Eat nutritious food, be physically active, drink plenty of fluids, and by all means, manage your stress. Try to not listen into other peoples conversations, especially if there is a negative undertone. Keep a positive outlook, your glass is half full, not half empty. Above all else: avoid close contact with people who are infected. Remember those individuals can be recognized with word phrasing like: big deal, I don’t care, so what, no body works as hard as I do around here.
Please protect yourself and your loved ones by keeping a positive attitude and don’t fall into a trap of negative behavior that is set by those who have contracted the whiney-ass flu.