I had surgery Oct. 30, 2008. I lost a total of 43 pounds and have gained back 23 pounds of that.
To top it all off, I was self pay. After all was said and done, I spent 'round about $24,000.00.
I know my husband is pissed, he just doesn't say anything. He wanted to use that money to build a garage onto our house. I wish he had. At least we'd have something to show for it.

Things were going so well the first 6 months. I was losing (slow, but losing) and then stalled for about a month and decided to go in for a small fill. I'm talking .1cc. Then, things started to go downhill from there. I'm not blaming the band. Shoot, 99.9 % of it is all my fault.

I've started back to eating whatever I want. Bread, Sweets. The only thing that I have managed to stick to is not having any sodas. I haven't had one since early October of 2008. I want to go in for a fill, but I'm scared. Like I said, things were fine until I had that last fill. I started having reflux and couldn't  get rid of it. I still have it daily, but it is not bad. I have fibromyalgia and can't exercise like I need to.

Please don't think that I am wanting anyone to feel sorry for me. I sure don't feel sorry for myself. I know I need a swift kick in the ass. I just don't know where to start. Any advice?


Thanks,
~Amy~ 

 Hi Amy, 

Just take a deep breath and start from the beginning.  Go back to the very day that you came home from surgery and start over.  Liquids, mushies, then solids.  Try to decarb yourself again.  Get in ANY kind of movement whether it is picking up the house or doing dishes.  Do something.  

I know it is discouraging to lose it slowly, I'm right there with you on the slow side, but we can do it!  It may take awhile, but you've already shown that you are capable of losing weight with the initial 43 pounds.  

Take it slow and steady and don't give up.  I wouldn't go in for another fill until I was back where I needed to be with portion control and carbs.  

Good luck sweetie, and keep coming here for help.  This sight really is a Godsend and helps me stay focused every day. :)


Toni

Here are some follow up questions:

Can you make an appt with your Dr. to talk about the reflux?  Maybe you just need a reflux medication. If you can get food down without problem then you probably don't have the reflux because you are too tight.

When is the reflux happening?  Are you eating right before bed? 

I know you said you are making bad food choice but even when you make those choices, do you follow the band rules re: small bites and chewing really well?  Do you ever feel restriction?

I am not an expert. My weight loss has been slow but just trying to get more info.

P.S. I am sorry you are going through this. It must be so much pressure on you to succeed when you took the garage $ for this surgery. One thing to remember..........you can make your band work for you at any time. Just because it hasn't so far, it wasn't a one shot deal.  It is still there and with some help from your surgeon, you should be able to get back on track.

I really think you need more restriction. Also take a step back and look at the big picture, remember why it is so important for you to succeed at this. It is definitely more important than the garage. Get rid of all the stuff in the house that is tempting you. Cook good quality meats and vegetables and forget the snacky stuff.  Its work and its tough, but you can do this.  I am self pay too and I will not give up until I reach goal and then I will fight to maintain.  Maybe your surgeon should check and make sure your band or port doesnt have a leek or something.  Good Luck!

It's hard getting back on track.  Your issue is white carbs.  It's time to have a "come to Jezuzzz" meeting with yourself.  Either you want weight loss or you don't.  It *is* okay if you don't want it, it's not a sin.  Some people are exceedingly happy being their current weight.

BUT... if you want to lose weight it's time to pooh or get off the pot.  I say this lovingly, I swear.  But it's true.

Maybe this would help?

www.obesityhelp.com/member/midwesterngirl/blog/2008/05/

If you seriously want to lose weight, this is what you do.

Go through the house and toss every white carb there.  Pitch/give away all flour, sugar, rice, potatos, pasta, and every food item that contains these products.  That means bread, crackers, the works.  Nobody in your home including your husband needs those foods.  I don't care if you throw them away or give them away, just get them out of your house.  We don't need "food" treats, it just causes cravings for more "food" treats.  Treat yourself to a manicure, a pedicure, a new hair style, a new outfit but we don't need food treats.  That is exactly what got us into the position of needing WLS to begin with.  What we need is a healthy diet and with any WLS food amounts are so restricted we don't have a right to tell ourselves we DESERVE treats, what we deserve is a nutritionally balanced diet that feeds our body, not our fat cells.

Then you go to this website and buy this workbook:

used.addall.com/SuperRare/submitRare.cgi

It's not a diet, it's a solution.  You choose your own food plan, this workbook is an interactive book designed to help you understand why we eat the way we do and how YOU can fix your own brain.  I'm doing it too, just to stay on track.  It's a great resource.  Now, you can buy the book new at Barnes & Noble for $17.00 USD but this is cheaper.

Tomorrow... not next week, TOMORROW start on the 5DPT but a low carb version.  No creamed soups, this is to get off carbs, not to drink them.  Do 2 days of protein shakes with no more than 20gms TOTAL carbs daily.  Not net carbs, total carbs.  Buy protein shakes you don't need to mix with milk.  Don't count calories, I don't care how many calories you have, just don't eat solids and don't go over 20gms carbs daily.  Then do 2 days of soft proteins such as fish, tuna, eggs, those kinds of food.  Then do 1 day of dense protein such as chicken breast, shrimp, turkey breast, steak, etc.

No more than 20gms of carbs daily for 5 days.

Starting day #6 start adding in veggie carbs.  No fruits, you don't need them.  If you want something sweet have some berries but no oranges, apples, etc.  It's too early for you in your carb withdrawl for that.

Tomorrow moring bright and early you be sitting by your phone waiting for your MD office to open and you schedule a fill.

Daily do your workbook (link posted above).  And really really do it, work the workbook, do the daily written exercises.  Don't miss a day, it takes 10 minutes.

Do your regular exercises.  20 minutes daily, we ALL have time for that.  If you have time to post on message boards you have time to take a 20 minute walk.  If you can't walk for 20 minutes than walk for 5 minutes and I mean WALK!  Power walking.  Each day add a minute.  I don't care if you are too tired or not, do it anyway.  It's a responsibility you owe to yourself and to your husband for not having a garage.

And $24K for a band?  Holy crap, is it made of gold?  Look, you have a lot of money, emotions, a garage, and a relationship with your husband invested in this band.  Get out there and get it done.  Get your life back.

I'd love to hold your hand or pat your head, I do neither well.  I'm a bottom line type person.  Do it or don't, it's your choice.

Good luck to you.

Ohhh, one more thing.

No excuse for not exercising. Fibro patients need it just for fibro alone not to mention weight loss.

I agree with the tough love midwestern gave, but I also know how horrible the pain can be from fibro.  I have that along with a bad vascular disease that ate away at my joints.  When I find the pain is too much I do exercises in bed.  There are days I just can't get out of bed.  I can, however, do crunches or leg lifts.  A lot of people don't understand how horrible the pain can be.  It's not just in one area.  It radiates so I do understand that part.  On your good days, walk just a few minutes.  But on your bad days I know how important it is to rest or you will only get worse.  I'm sorry people think it's a matter of laziness when we are going through a flare.  But I think we have more strength than most  know about. 

I'm not angry with midwestern; I had no idea how horrible these illnesses could be until I got them.  I wouldn't wish them on my worst enemy.  YOU CAN GET BACK ON TRACK THOUGH.  THROW OUT THE **** AND NO MORE EXCUSES!!   The 5 day low carb is a great way to start.  Once you start losing your water weight and a little fat weight I'm sure walking will get easier and easier.

HUGS and get to throwing out the crap food!!!!

As much as I hate to agree with MWG (and I've had to several times this week), I'd follow her suggestions except for the fill. Before you even consider a fill make sure you aren't already too tight. I had minor reflux for months and didn't really pay much attention to it till it got a little worse and I had a small unfill. Well guess what, I didn't crave the junk as much because I could eat better quality food like ummm protein! So before a fill make sure you are eating literally pea sized bites, chew till mushy, finish one bite before taking another and don't eat too close to bed time. If this doesn't stop the reflux then you may actually need a small unfill. Good luck!

To be honest I was assuming she wasn't too tight considering she has no problem with bread.

She doesn't refer to being too tight, she's not complaining of reflux, maybe I'm missing it but I don't see where she is too tight.  Just that she got a 0.1cc fill and went downhill from there.

Amy~ I could have written this post myself. You have gotten alot of great responses. Thank you for posting this and to all that responded. I agree that the best part is that we can ALWAYS start over!! We can do this! :)