What did you do???

Yoyo4life
on 10/3/13 5:38 am - Brampton, Canada
RNY on 01/08/14

So my mom did follow me to my orientation and i was thinking since she followed me to my orientation then she is behind me in my decision to have this surgery but i guess not...so this week i had my nurse appointment and she asks me how did it go and i tell her, then she tells me how i shouldn't have the surgery and that if there is another way or something else i can do??? So now im confused first she was supporting me and at my orientation and now she is questioning if i should have this surgery..I honestly do no know what to do now...and now my fiance has read my orientation papers and the presentation they give you and he is asking me if im sure this is what i want to do and the rate for death is is 1 in 300 people and he is telling me all the negatives but not all the positives...im very boggled by there responses to this decision that i have made for not only myself but my family being healthy...i just want to know is there anyone else who was or is in this situation that could give me there input on what they did because right now im at a lost for words...please help?!?!?!?

    

Referral sent: Aug/30/2013 Orientation: September/24/2013 Nurse Appointment: September/30/2013 Social worker Appointment: October/7/2013 Psychologist Appointment:Oct/11/13 Dietician Appointment:Oct/21/13 Nutrition Class: Oct/29/2013 Surgeons Appointment: Nov/22/2013 PATTS: December/13/2013 Surgery date: January/08/2014

    
Catw
on 10/3/13 5:47 am - Arnprior, Canada

Your Mom and fiance have heard/read the warnings.  And they are scared.  They know you want to be healthy, but they see that there is a chance of losing you, not that there is 299 out of 300 chance you'll be fine (and the odds are actually probably higher).  Maybe you could point out all the negatives of not doing this.  Emotionally and physically.  Look for a local support group, and maybe take them to one of the meetings.  Then they can ask more from people who have gone through this.  Let theme see the positive side of the surgery.

Maybe once they understand a bit more, they won't be as scared.

Good luck with your journey!

Cathy

        

Hennagirliegirl
on 10/3/13 5:51 am - Canada

it's a toughy for sure. Wanting approval and support, thinking you have it, then wondering what path to take if you don't have it. 

I guess you have to become introspective and decide what it is that YOU want, then process all of the external opinions that you have chose to enlist in this process and go from there. personally when I was on the final leg of decision I chose to include my partner, period. Then when I was ready I presented it to my parents and sister not as an option for debate, but as a firm plan that I was hoping for support with. Even then my Mother made a comment that stills affects me. I can't imagine having brought her into the circle of discussion earlier, I know it would have made me second guess myself.

They are correct, this does not come without risk, I'm sure you are well aware of that yourself, and chances are, their concern is coming from a place of love. regardless, ultimately it is your decision, so, are you sure yourself, or are you still somewhere i. The process where. You need to digest, do more research etc...

I wish you all the luck in this journey.

Terri

kathycantwait
on 10/3/13 5:57 am - Canada
Hi
The surgery is a personal decision. As for the DEATH RATE it is misleading, that rate is world wide including places that have a backwards health care. I'm not sure what hospital you would be going through but Dr.Hagen @ HRRH told me himself that the actual rate in ON is 1 in 1000 and even that is not from the surgery it could be the anesthetic or prior conditions people may have had. This 1 in 1000 is comparable to having your tonsils out. Your family just wants the best for you do your research and show them, the unknown is always the scariest educate them to all the pros and cons to help them make an informed decision. Just to let you know I have talked to a lot of people that have had the surgery and not one person regrets it. Think of what the risks will be if you don't have the surgery you are at a greater risk by being obese then having the surgery.
I hope this helps a bit GOOD LUCK to you
Kathy

    

        
Patm
on 10/3/13 6:00 am - Ontario, Canada
RNY on 01/20/12

When I decided to have this surgery my son was dead against it. He didn't realise that the chance of death for me was greater if i didn't have the surgery. I am older having it and had a lot of co morbidities.

Now he is fine but the day of the surgery he sat with my husband and waited to see me in my room before he would leave the hospital.

as others have said this is about you and what you need for your health and well being

  

 

 

 

amybob
on 10/3/13 6:02 am
My mom/ sister said the same thing. 'There are better ways' but once I was in the process and they digested it they came around.
Hope it all works out for you. You have to what's best for you
hynesj85
on 10/3/13 6:31 am - Mississauga, Canada
RNY on 10/02/13
I had surgery yesterday.....I'm alive. My husband was the only person against it and by the time I had surgery I told him if he don't support me I'm outta here. It is not about your family or your family, that's your life no one elses!

Referral Sent June 03 2013////Orientation @ TWH July 08 2013////Nurse Practitioner July 10 2013////Sleep Study July 20 2013////Social Worker July 23 2013////Nutrition Class August 20 2013////Dietitian August 13/21 2013////Psychologist August 13 2013////Sleep Study Results August 21 2013////Surgeon Appointment Sept 06 2013////SURGERY @TEGH October 2 2013    

 

    
Zizzler
on 10/3/13 8:56 am

Hope you are feeling ok and that things went well...

Highest: 320, Surgery: 255 (Aug/14), Lowest: 132, Current: 167, Goal: 155

Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards. - Soren Kierkegaard

Yoyo4life
on 10/3/13 6:53 am - Brampton, Canada
RNY on 01/08/14

thank you all so very much for your input and your rsponses to my post i really appreicate it...i have mad my decision final to have surgery but to know i had support would have made it that much worth it...i have takin all your responses into consideration and I will do my best at making this decision about me and my health...and to hynesj85 im so glad to so you here and posting even though I knew you would ...but hope your fine and your recovering smoothly...hope to hear about your experience when you get better or even better an upload on youtube...your advise is always a bonus on here thanks...

    

Referral sent: Aug/30/2013 Orientation: September/24/2013 Nurse Appointment: September/30/2013 Social worker Appointment: October/7/2013 Psychologist Appointment:Oct/11/13 Dietician Appointment:Oct/21/13 Nutrition Class: Oct/29/2013 Surgeons Appointment: Nov/22/2013 PATTS: December/13/2013 Surgery date: January/08/2014

    
hynesj85
on 10/3/13 6:53 pm - Mississauga, Canada
RNY on 10/02/13

Yes, do what's right for you. I am in pain...not dying pain but just soreness. I am still in denial that this finally happened. I will for sure make a video for youtube this week!

Referral Sent June 03 2013////Orientation @ TWH July 08 2013////Nurse Practitioner July 10 2013////Sleep Study July 20 2013////Social Worker July 23 2013////Nutrition Class August 20 2013////Dietitian August 13/21 2013////Psychologist August 13 2013////Sleep Study Results August 21 2013////Surgeon Appointment Sept 06 2013////SURGERY @TEGH October 2 2013    

 

    
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