Personal insight.

Good Morning everybody.   Just wanted to drop a line about some things I have thought about. 

 

The first thing,  To all of you that have had surgery, congratulations.  Those of you that have posted pictures, please keep posting as they are very inspirational. 

 

I would like to point out that, your Pre-op vs Post –op Pictures, not only do you look physically better.  You all look Happy in your pictures.  There is clearly a difference in your emotional state, I find it amazing that i can see the emotional difference.  it looks great and I really look forward to being happy and not just putting on a smile.

 

You know what I have come to realize, That the only difference between me and a functional  alcoholic and/or  drug abuser is Everybody can see what my disease /vice is. (Depending which side of the fence you are on)

 

Once I have this surgery; because I am more on the disease side of the fence.  I am going to have to treat it as such.  Much  like a recovering Alcoholic or ex-smoker. (Which I am one  - Smoker)  It is going to be hard.

 

 Why, because unlike Alcohol or Nicotine, we all need to eat.  That said.  I will have to emotionally and mentally manage the disease on an Hour by Hour basis.

 

From what I have read on the boards. (Understand that I am not trying to be critical of anybody, and I have not had surgery yet)   It appears to me that the people that are having a hard time loosing (discounting  Stalls) or maintaining is because they are not mentally treating being obese and food addictions for what they are.  Addictions.   Even when you reach goal, I think that we will have to maintain the mindset  of a Fat person, much like an alcoholic, is always an alcoholic, just in a different phase of the disease

 

If this journey is anything like quitting smoking,  then it must be treated as an addiction.  That you have to face your demons on an hour by hour, situation by situation basis, and be proud of your victory’s and accept your failures as an opportunity to learn and not a reason to give-up.  Using the smoking analogy, I know personally that I am never going to be able to even have a drag or 1 smoke every again, because of my addiction, I am aware of what it will lead to, be it one smoke leading to two, or one cheeseburger leading to two.  I know that more than one Cheeseburger over the course of 20 years got me to the point I am at.

 

And from what I have read, it is not going to be easy.  Sure the first 6-18 months are easy.. but when you get comfortable, that’s when the old habits start creeping back in, Slider foods, empty calories, couch surfing. 

 

I am a long way off, but I can see the bench, I look forward to eventually being on it with the rest of you.  But for now, I will continue to read and learn from all the veterans.

 

Thanks for this board.

 

Cheers

 

Mark

Hi Mark,

You are 100% right, we are all suffering from an addition, and if we don't be careful, we will slide back into that addiction.  Some of us (including me) know that all too well.

The important thing is to realize when you've slid, accept it, figure out why, and decide to change.  When you decide to change, realize that you are not alone in this.  The hardest part is asking for help when you need it.  But while our addiction is more complicated than others, it does have one advantage.  There is help and support out there, if you only reach for it.  You are not a failure when you slide, only if you do nothing about it. 

I keep telling my kids when skating, it doesn't matter how often you fall, it matters how often you pick yourself up.  Yes, if you fall alot, you have to figure out why and work on it.  As long as you are willing to work on the problems, you are not failing yourself.  There are a lot of bumps in our journey, before and after surgery.  The road isn't easy, not for anyone.  And not everyone has the same problems.  We all have to face different things, but we all have to remember that we aren't alone in this.  We may not be able to see each other, but we are all there for each other. Good, bad.or ugly.

For those *****ad and think that they have slid too far, you're wrong.  There is always a way to get back.  And we'll be here to help you and support you through the journey.

Good luck to everyone on your journeys.

Cathy

What Catw said is so true. I am 20 months out and have now gone for CBT to help with my addictions. I realise that I need to be ever vigilant or I will regain.

Good luck on your journey. You have realised what many refuse to face. This will help you in the long run to maintain what you lose.

Great post - absolutely agree that this is an addiction.  (And I'm sure not addicted to apples and celery....lol)

In addition - all addicts have slips along the way - it's part of the recovery process.  I'm not an expert on this journey, but I know that my tool "helps" me to get back on track more quickly than I could without it.

Best wishes to you!

Kerry

Well said everyone and good for Mark for accepting that this is an addiction, before even starting the journey.  I watched a show on The Fifth Estate last Sunday that showed just how addictive sugar is and it was scary. I have known for a long time that sugar and fats (like in ice cream) are addictive and so have accepted that they are both out of my diet for evermore!  I have been in AA for 25 years (sober) and I now follow the AA program to deal with my sugar and fats addiction.  I try to live one day at a time and I know that I cannot do this on my own.  I need the help and wisdom of all you who post on this website and I also need a "Higher Power" of my own understanding (who I choose to call God but whatever you believe in will work for you!).

If you want proof of just how addictive sugar is, buy the book called "Fat Chance". I read the whole thing cover to cover in a week and it was scary. Sugar is just so damaging. And it talked about the sugar industry and how they are in cahoots with the government (FDA - Food and Drug Administration), trying to hide just how dangerous sugar is from the public.

Another great book for "recovery" is: A Course in Weight Loss, "21 Spiritual Lessons For Surrendering Your Weight Forever", by Marianne Williamson. When I feel like eating "mindlessly", I go and pick up either one of these books.

Anyway, I hope this helps someone and I just want to thank those who continue to post. I had my surgery in July and am down 60 lbs. so far but I treat every day as "a new beginning". Have a wonderful 24 hours!

 

 

 

Yes, you hit the nail on the head.  For me, I had to move away from some people in my personal circle because they were all part of the head set I needed to clear away from.  After surgery you will quickly realize how much of our society is centered around food& drink.  I do think the whole food industry is the new tobacco and to be aware of this makes it easier to stare the beast down.

I think food is the most complex and difficult addiction to treat because junk food is everywhere in your face all day. Plus we need food to live so we can't just stop eating cold turkey. Smoking has warning labels that they kill, potato chips do not, as an example. It is like sending a cocaine addict out into a world full of cheap legal cocaine with sellers everywhere you look. How long until that person slips? Not long. Thanks

Well said!