I'm so sorry you are feeling this way. You probably already know this, but Estrogen is stored in fat cells and when we lose large amounts of weight, those hormones are dumped into our system causing mood swings and depression.
Also, often times there is a tendency to fall into a depression after major surgery. Your body has been cut on, drugged, poked and prodded. It takes a while to get all the drugs and stuff out of your system. On top of all that, you have lost your best friend and/or coping system, ie. food. Eating for comfort is not there for you any more.
Being able to go to a therapist who has eating behavior training, can be a great help. Support groups are wonderful and our RNY board is a great resource. There, you will find others who have experienced the same things you have. They are willing to help and always willing to listen.
I believe that once the newness of all this is over and you are feeling better, that you will be happy you had this done.
I hope you are feeling better soon! Hugs to you.
Original surgery VSG Feb. 2009
Revised to RNY Feb. 2016.
Start weight: 252. Current weight: 120
From what you have posted, you had to have RNY for your GERD issues. Most people who did the same do feel better and are happy with their revisions. Try to focus on getting your protein in and getting enough rest. Your body needs time to heal.
I also had "buyers remorse" and cried for weeks after my surgery. I had to learn to forgive myself for gaining the weight and not being able to lose it without surgery. I now know I needed surgery to save my life. I have no regrets.
Hang in there!! I promise it will get better!!
Laura in Texas
51 years old; 5'7" tall; HW: 339 (BMI=53); CW: 140 (BMI=22)
RNY: 09-17-08 Dr. Garth Davis
brachioplasty: 12-18-09 Dr. Wainwright; lbl/bl: 06-28-11 Dr. LoMonaco
"If what you're doing doesn't work, change what you're doing - don't complain that it doesn't work."
as simplistic as it may sound - "what was done - it is in the past" You can't change it. Instead try to focus on a future. Think of today struggles as something that can make you stronger. More resilient. it is tough. so? crying only halps a little.
Set up goals "bucket list". from something easy - like "drink a glass of water without pain" to "someone called me skinny today, and they meant it" (even if it is "you skinny *****!!" . Make it fun. or practical: "wake up without burning in my throat 2 days in a raw".
when I deal with some **** I often think "What is that I need to learn from that?" "patience? or ability to deal with pain or gas? " "or that my BF loves me even when we had to evacuate the hotel room after I farted? (we stayed out for an hour after opening the window - we had a nice walk in the garden). And so on...
cry, laugh, swear...Scream if taht helps you.. then get over it and start seeing the positives... There are always some positives... you just need to discover what they are...
Hala. RNY 5/14/2008; Happy At Goal =HAG
"I can eat or do anything I want to - as long as I am willing to deal with the consequences"
"Failure is not falling down, It is not getting up once you fell... So pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start all over again...."