There are stages to this process and I understand that. Looking back on my own process I think a lot about what I wish I could tell new post-op Nikki from where I sit right now. And I have decided it is this.

You are you. You are you for a reason. You can’t and won’t be anybody else besides you. But guess what? You are awesome! There is nobody else like you and because of that you have unique and wonderful gifts to bring to the world.

Keeping all that in mind…STOP comparing yourself to everyone else. They are not you and you are not them.

STOP sweating the small stuff and live this life. Because all too soon you’ll find more years behind you than ahead.

STOP selling yourself short. You deserve all the love, happiness, good health, good vibes, happy memories and healthy relationships the universe has to offer but those rarely just knock on your door. More often you have to make positive changes within yourself to attract positive changes around you. Good energy draws more good energy to you. So STOP the negativity.

STOP limiting yourself. You can do whatever it is you put your mind to. You really can. Barring physical ailments, most of the time it’s mind over matter. So in reality YOU are the roadblock standing between you and any goal you have in life. So STOP doing that.

Lastly, STOP choosing unhappiness over happiness. Yep, that’s right “Newbie Nikki” happiness is a CHOICE. It’s rarely the easy choice. Life is stressful. The only thing that is constant is change. As soon as you get to one mile marker on the journey your brain thinks about how long it is until the next mile marker but guess what else? YOU get to choose to move about this journey with an attitude of abundance and the spirit of joy. Or you can move about this journey with an attitude of lamentation. It’s truly your CHOICE. While choosing happiness is by far the more difficult thing to do, it is so freeing. Let go of everything that makes you feel worthless and incomplete. It takes years, decades, lifetimes but as you drop each piece of negativity along your path you’ll find yourself lighter, stealthier, and moving at a faster pace toward where and WHO you want to be.

So that’s what the new me would tell the old me. And it’s also what I’d tell all of you. We focus so much on the food, the food, the food. Not to sound cliché but it truly isn’t about what we’re eating, but what’s eating us. When we get closer to being in touch with our emotional selves we start to find a bit of peace with the food aspect. Even a bit more peace with the weight aspect (although even the most centered person is capable of being knocked off kilter there too).

Bottom line: be good to yourself. You only get this one life and it’s a shame to waste a single moment of it needlessly torturing yourself. Motivating? Yes. Pushing yourself beyond your comfort zone and way past what you thought you could do? Absolutely! Torture? No, no, no…

AWESOME ADVICE!!!  and very well put!  I think I'm gonna print this and keep a copy with me for when I'm feeling those "down days"

Thanks Nik...great as always!
Marie

 Wow Nik that is so awesome! Like Marie I think I will copy this to my page so I can read it over and over as I go through this journey I do believe it will help me. Thank you thank you :)

 ^^^like

I needed this Nik, thanks! It is hard not to compare yourself to everyone here, but I have. Lessons learned.

My favorite line is "it truely isn't about what we're eating, but what's eating us." ----so true for so many!      Once again "well said, Nik".

Nik,
I just wanted to say thanks for this post today. It really hit home for me. I am almost 16 weeks out and was doing extremely well. At the end of July, I did something to my neck and it was making my arm go numb and gave excrusiating pain. All this  happened after only 2 sessions with a personal trainer that I had signed up with. I was so excited about joining the gym and doing the right thing, then the neck thing. I felt like Satan was trying to keep a girl down.

I went to the chiropractor for the first time and found I actually have a reverse curve in my neck, bone spurs, and about 25 years worth of disc degeneration.  I have been feeling not myself due to the pain and upset because no exercise for a week. This morning I vowed I wa****ting the gym today no matter what at least to do the arc trainer and the treadmill. I felt like "hell no I am not gonna let this keep me down."  So reading your post today just helped reinforce that feeling, especially the  STOP limiting yourself. You can do whatever it is you put your mind to. You really can. Barring physical ailments, most of the time it’s mind over matter. So in reality YOU are the roadblock standing between you and any goal you have in life. So STOP doing that.

So thank you for all that you post and do for this forum. You help so many people. I just wanted to say YOU ROCK SISTER!!!!
 
Hugs!

 Go you! But please be careful and don't injure yourself further either!

Would pool exercises work better?

this is a week where i needed this, thank you!

 After all my scale madness of last week I needed it too.

Sometimes I just need to stop and breathe!

Nicki I'm bookmarking this it's worth reading over and over again and again. 

STOP selling yourself short. You deserve all the love, happiness, good health, good vibes, happy memories and healthy relationships the universe has to offer but those rarely just knock on your door. More often you have to make positive changes within yourself to attract positive changes around you. Good energy draws more good energy to you. So STOP the negativity.

This was something I had to work on early out and occassionally have to remind myself again.  

Amen!  We are all here for a short while.  Enjoy life NOW!!!!!  It is so hard sometimes to put ourselves first, but we can always chose to be happy.  Excellent read.  I always thank God every day I wake up for giving me this awesome life I have.  I am so grateful to him that I am here.

Awesome post!  No one could have said it better. It's about the journey not the end. About being positive and celebrating the victories not comparing ourselves to others and lamenting we haven't lost as fast. Great post!

Standing Ovation!!!

Powerful !!!