Anxiety

So... I am 7 months out and doing pretty well. My surgeon predicted that I would lose avout 85 pounds, which I am at now. I still hope to lose another 30 pounds or so, and it has been going good... I am developing some good habits, and learning how to deal with scary food situations. But.

Today was my first day without two jobs. I quit both on Friday so that I can move to a farm and open a campground. I am moving back to live with my wife, away from my mother temporarily. I also had my daughter over the weekend and took her back to college this morning. That aleays gets me, because I just love her to death and miss her when she is gone.

After I dropped my daughter off, well actually while I was dropping her off, I got a little emotional. It just got worse and worse, and then I realized that I wanted to eat. But I do not do that anymore. Anxiety just seemed to well up out of me and that is really the first time since surgery that it overwhelmed me. My daughter stsyed for a few more minutes and we discussed that this is exciting but still a huge change, and she went about her day and I went about mine but not really.

I ended up going shopping and bought some new tops and smaller jeans, which I needed, and the ladies at the store commented on how small I look in them. I did not spend too much, but OMG. So much anxiety that I thought I did not have. The thought to eat is still in there, and it is strong. I see now that it was hiding, or taking a break, but I have not dealt with it.

Yikes. This is a scary new world.

Such true words and feelings. I think it's great nthat you were able to recognize how you were feeling. I know I was used to hiding the feelings instead of feeling the feelings.... does that even make sense? Sending hugs.

Yup. Thanks! I am so glad I can come here, post and there are people *****ally get it. And new clothes are helpful too ;)

You are worthy of clothes that fit.

You have a whole lot of stuff going on. Any one of those things would be big.

You are feeling things and being mindful of what you are eating. That's the ticket here. You get to work on that forever if you are any thing like me.

I'm another emotional eater too so you are definitely not alone. At nearly 5 years out I've come to realize that this will always be a struggle for me. I often journal my feelings now when I get upset,worried or stressed as it forces me to get them out instead of burying them under a pile of food lIke I used to before surgery. We are all a work in progress and some days are easier than others. We just have to each take life one choice at a time. Congratulations on the smaller jeans too. I still want to laugh when people tell me I'm tiny. Just not a word I thought I would ever hear linked to my name.

I know right? I bought a size Petite Medium sweater today. Lol'ling the entire time. I never guessed I would be a petite anything.

Drug/Alcohol addicts deal with this sort of thing all the time. For them it's literally "one day at a time"

Personally I've been focusing on how much control I have over what I eat. It's easy now because I'm an infant RNYer but I know the day is coming when my pouch will accept more. Hopefully I'll be ready to cope when that super stressful day comes.

Today was my first "one day at a time" day but it was literally one minute at a time. Having this forum filled with people who understand the struggle is more helpful than I can say.

My hospital/bariatric surgical unit runs 2 monthly support groups and I went to one of the meetings as part of my pre-surgical process. It was a real eye-opener. People like me learn from hearing about other folks struggles. I truly appreciate you sharing your story.