HELP

Good morning everyone!

As of march 29th I am six years out from my gastric bypass surgery. I have lost 200 pounds. Yea for me .. NOT really.. here is my issues.

My PCP says i need to loose 45 more pounds to get me to the level im supposed to be for my height, well, its impossible! I am stuck at this same size for over 2 years now. I have a friend that had gastric bypass over a year a go, she has lost all her weight and this month is going to have her weight loss skin removal surgery. I feel defeated, I feel ashamed, I feel useless and just major depression. I cant get motivated to do anything. I have a memebership to the YMCA, and never go. .why? cause whats the point it doesnt do me any good, and my depression is very bad, and I just cant even get myself to do anything.

I want to loose the 45 pounds, I really do, I dream of it every minute of the day. My depression is very bad, and no matter what I do ,, its not good enough.

I find myself eating all day. Im not hungry,, just my depression is high, and I feel useless. I feel everyone is against me, and why bother to look good , doesnt matter no one gives a darn.

Self esteem, I have NONE. I have no family that will support my issues, and I am on my own. I am trying to better myself by going to college online, and now I am being told Its up to a review board to accept my appeal letter, due to my past. Yes, I have a past, am I proud of it. .NOPE, but I feel if you are trying to better yourself and completely change your life, why knock someone back down to the point they are helpless?

Sorry, little off subject.. Just need advice, and well a friend!

Rhonda

Hi Rhonda,

Thanks for sharing and being so candid.

You speak of your depression and how it's affecting your life in so many ways. Are you in any medication for your depression? What about counseling?

I would really recommend you seek some counseling. Particularly with no support in your life. The right counselor will be able to help you with depression, self esteem, eating addictions and so many things.

Don't give up, hang in there and make some choices to get you where you want to be in life. You can do this!

Yes Rhonda YEAH for you :) you lost 200 lbs and have kept it off for 6 years! You say not really, I disagree you are awesome! Stay positive and try each day. I am 10 years out as of this May 20. I Lost 140 from my highest weight and was below my goal. Last 2 years or so battling about 40 lbs regain to be at my best weight (normal bmi and where I look and feel healthy). I took 25 off this past year (but put 5 back on recently over Easter and being away a couple days). I should have already taken the other 20 I want and need off but I did not set my priorities 100 percent of the time and slacked and enjoyed myself too much at times lately. To be truthful I am okay with that. I consider myself a success! I am not skinny like I was wearing size 2 and 4 jeans but I still look very good and rocking in my 6 or 8"s. I am happy and determined I will get the rest off. Think what you have accomplished .... life after wls is not easy and we are not perfect but still you are a complete success Rhonda.... Do not measure yourself to your friend we are all different. Like the affirmative picture the that Kathy in member services posted last couple weeks. You have to stay positive and keep looking ahead.... life is good and we have to enjoy life where we are right now and strive to make changes to get the extra off if that is what you need and want.

Best to you on your awesome journey.... you have and are doing great....

Megan

I'm sorry to hear you are struggling Rhonda, unfortunately I can't give any advice regarding the weight loss (I haven't had my surgery yet) but it sounds to me like that isn't the real problem here anyways. I second Nancy's question; are you getting treatment for your depression? I sincerely hope so, but it sounds like you are not. So often we ignore out mental health, but we wouldn't put off seeking treatment for diabetes or high blood pressure, so why not treat depression? If you are getting treatment, I would encourage you to look at switching counselors or changing medication because whatever you are doing now doesn't seem to be working...at all.

Once you get the depression under control (or better controlled) I think the weight loss with be significantly easier. I think most people here know from first hand experience that losing weight while depressed is about the hardest thing you can do.

I hope things get better and you find the support you need, you will find support here if you stay, but you cannot expect anything to improve until you address your depression. That is your first step in my opinion.

-Haley

You have lost 200!!!!! Pounds. OMG I am so proud of you! You just made the hardest step, you reached out. 45 pounds---you can do that, I know you can and you know how to do it. Don't do it for the dang dr. Do it for you. I too suffer from depression but medication helps a lot. We here at OH give you a big hug and now girl you pull up those big girl panties, toss the junk, buy a new outfit, get mani pedi and love yourself again. We do

Are you seeing someone about your depression? Are you taking medication for your depression? Speaking from experience, it can make a HUGE difference in your quality of life.

• yes I take pristiq everyday, busoar too. I was in counseling but all she mostly said was. "how's that nake you feel' . 1 hour of all that.. did nothing for next at all. I'm in a situation where my past is haunting me, I have admitted to the crime, did my probation, and it's been 10 years, never was in jail, didn't murder anyone, and was 10 yrs ago! I'm going to college online, they did my background check, and seen all that on my records, I am appealing their eecisdec,I will know on the 18th if they let me continue to go to school. In the mean time I'm supposed to attend all lectures and do all the work, that's fine but if on the 18the they deny my appeal I have to stop, and it's wasted time doing all the college work! Sorry off subject..

Rhonda

Have you talked to a doctor about adjusting your medication lately? I've been on meds for bipolar for over 15 years, and I've had to make a lot of adjustments along the way. For some meds, I had to tweak the doses when my depression got bad, and a few meds just stopped working completely and I had to try something else. The good news is that there are a lot of options out there right now, so maybe a different med would help!

Seconded! I'm really pushing the mental health thing here because you can obviously lose and keep off the weight (you've clearly shown that).

You lost 200 lbs and have kept it off for 6 years? If so that's awesome! There's a guy 2 posts back who had surgery 2 months ago and he's crying because he wants to eat chocolate! Lol. Hello? Who doesn't want to eat chocolate?

Losing another 45 lbs is nice but I'd say you have to deal with one issue at a time. Is you think you're depressed you should seek medical help. A psychiatrist. They deal with medication. Then there's usually counseling that goes with that. I think if you can get the right help for this then all your other issues will likely become easier to deal with. Hang in there!