I love science.

Thank you for your explanation. Me, and my love of carbonation thank you. :)

I haven't gone through surgery yet, but it sounds like maybe your self confidence is burned a little because you've gained most of your weight back.

I think that the improvement after surgery is due to the gained self-confidence and self-esteem due to the weight loss.

I haven't done any research on how hormones are affected post surgery, especially the ones which help your sex drive. I suggest reading some Cosmo mags, find ways to be OK with your body, have your guy compliment your body, and work on it together. Make 1 night a week your romantic night, sexual or non-sexual. If 1 night a week seems too much, find a schedule that works for the two of you.

If you're not doing it yet, I also suggest getting into counseling for yourself, or for you and your guy. Sometimes learning how to communicate with each other can be a hindrance in the bedroom. I couldn't figure out why my husband and I hadn't had sex in 6 months. I tried everything I could think of to get him interested, nothing worked. Finally, through counseling he told me that my weight turned him off which was why he didn't want to have sex with me.

I don't think your situation is the same as mine, but finding ways to talk it out with your husband, or take small steps towards being more intimate might help. Holding hands, snuggling, kissing... non-sexual things. It might help you warm up. Those are just my 2 cents. I hope the suggestions help.

The only two people who know right now are my husband, and a good friend of mine who had the surgery also. Right now, the news isn't going any further beyond them. I totally understand knowing who you've told against who you haven't told. 

Knowing my the personality of my family, especially my mother, my husband suggested to wait until the night before surgery before telling them. Especially since it is such a serious surgery, and my family would want to visit me while I'm laid up in the hospital. Personally, I'd be fine with not saying anything at all, and just soak up the compliments when she, and the rest of my family notices I've lost weight. 

If I were in my mother's shoes, I would be hurt that my daughter wasn't comfortable telling me about important things like this. However, the relationship I have with my Mom isn't that "special" warm-fuzzy relationship most adult women enjoy with their mothers. My mother still thinks of me as a child, and feels it's necessary to control everything I do. Don't get me wrong, I'm not an irresponsible person. I work Monday - Friday 8 - 5, at my career, not a job. I pay my bills. I manage my personal things. I take care of myself like an adult should. She doesn't see me as a grown up yet.

Would I like to have my daughter keep stuff from me because she doesn't see me as a loving and trustworthy person to share that personal information with? No. I'd be heartbroken. Would I like to hear the news from a 3rd party instead of my daughter, no. With a bunch of hard work though, and if I can lose 25lbs in 3 months, I can have surgery quicker and I don't have to keep this from anyone much longer. 

I'm back again after a really long hiatus. When I went in for all my appointments to see if I qualified for surgery (I do), and get the process started (6 months dieting, etc). I went in with the intention of only telling a very small group of people. Parents, siblings, trusted cousins, and really close friends. 

Of those groups who I told, the only ones who supported and understood the decision were my trusted cousins, and really close friends. My siblings, and parents were not supportive at all. I don't know if their lack of support was because of their lack of knowledge, fear for me, or what. They made me second guess the entire operation, and I decided that maybe I should just try to diet like I have been and work out more. They made me feel like my decision for surgery was irrational, and I wasn't trying hard enough at dieting, even though I knew I had been. 

Then I had a moment of clarity, if a surgeon, my counselor, my psychiatrist, my family doctor, my obgyn, my surgeon's nurse, and the dietician all said that I needed this surgery. Why was I letting the voice of my family (mostly my mother's) control my decision? 7 medial professionals told me that not only did I qualify for the surgery, but that it would vastly improve my life. 

Since last May, I have switched jobs, which means a change in insurance. The though of surgery still in the back of my mind, but I was still letting the pre-recorded voice of my mother nag at me telling me to just continue to diet. Finally, I decided my counselor was right, I need to turn off the voice of my mother and do what's right for me. I called the surgeon's office on Friday. 

I found out that the requirements with my new insurance company are far less than the other company I was with. Instead of 6 months consecutive dieting, I need 3 months. I also need a visit with the dietician and a psychiatric evaluation, and to lose 25 lbs. The last 3 requirements were the same when I was with my other insurance company. I'll post something about that in the insurance forum... I think I remember seeing that somewhere on the boards here. 

A few weeks ago, my 2 year old niece visited my husband and I. While I was playing with her, she called me "Momma". I know that her calling me that had absolutely nothing to do with her thinking I was her mother, she is, after all, 2. But it really pulled on my heartstrings, and reminded me of how much I want to be a mother one day. Then I saw that photos my mother in law, and my husband took over the weekend. I saw how large I was in comparison to not only her, but everyone else around me. That's when I knew that I need to do this. 

Anyways... So I'm not going to tell my parents, family, and co-workers about the surgery. Last time I did, it was like I was defending myself for the decision, and that weight loss surgery was wrong. I know it's the right decision for me. I'm keeping the close people who need to know, in the know. The people who weren't as supportive, or not supportive at all. I'm not telling. 

Has anyone else been through surgery and not told their close family? Like parents? 

My husband says I should tell them the morning of the surgery, or the night before the surgery. I'm thinking of just not saying anything and waiting until they've noticed I lost weight, and then tell them. I'm curious to know other people's experiences. 

That's good to know that the BA multivitamins are nasty! hahaha
I figured I should start taking a daily vitamin now to get into the routine.

BA sells this awesome "Nectar" protein powder. It tastes like juice. No joke. It's not thick and gross smelling either. Well, kind of gross smelling, but you don't taste the whey like you do with other protein shakes. I highly recommend it. I got the "Fuzzy Peach" flavor and I could swear I'm drinking "tang".