Topic: RE: Getting scared about surgery and the lifestyle change.
I know what you're going through. I am on my 4th month of supervised nutrition for insurance purposes and I know the day will come when they give me the go ahead and schedule my date for RNY also.
For me, the preparation that my ins. company is making me go through is helping me practice the way I will need to eat/drink after surgery. So, I put notes on the fridge to take smaller bites, chew my food slower, don't drink with meals, eat protein first, etc. I have been trying my best to get used to this for the last two months. Also, I have been trying to eat healthier now, cutting out a lot of carbs and dairy. I know this will help me in the long run.
I don't think about the people this will affect honestly, that may sound selfish, but it is what it is. I am doing this to live a healthier, longer life. If the people around me don't like it-well, I guess they really don't love me. You may just find yourself with a new group of friends??? I read a book about addiction and one of the gals in the book said that addicts hang around addicts, I suppose people that like to eat all the time, like to hang around people that eat all the time. You may also find a lot of new activities to be more interesting than going out to dinner-like going bike riding or long walks??
I also, worry about failure-too much pressure to keep the weight off once everyone in the whole wide world knows you had WLS. For me, it is my own personal goal to maintain a healthy weight because I have a baby now at almost 44 yrs. old. I need to be healthy for him. I have never paid too much attention to what other people say behind my back. For me I think of it as a personal life long challenge with myself. That's a long time I know Ha!!!!! But, I am very competitive that way.
The only advice I could give you, is to take this time to get healthy, period. Don't think of the weight in terms of numbers. Think of it as you GETTING HEALTHY and that's it. Don't put any pressure on yourself to please anyone, friends, doctors, etc. I lost 50 lbs once in 5 months. I did it by cutting out processed foods like lunch meats, I cut out milk and I didn't eat bread or any white starches. I kept track of everything that went in my mouth. AND I WORKED OUT 5 DAYS A WEEK-RELIGIOUSLY. Sometimes not in a row. I knew if I ate one whole grain tortilla and it was 50 calories, I would have to burn 50 calories extra that day on the treadmill or however you track your burn-some people wear the arm bands. Then I got pregnant and now I can't get the weight off. My surgeon asked me how many times I have lost over 30 lbs and gained it right back. Too many times to keep track of!!! But, I have always been 50-100 lbs overweight my entire life, so I need a more permanant solution-RNY. People have told me on here and I have talked to my nut and surgeon and they both said you will always have the benefit of restriction. For me that is a good thing, because I am not someone that grazes all day-I just eat too much at each meal.
I hope I don't come off as being too harsh. I think a lot of over weight people are so worried about other people that sometimes we don't worry about ourselves. When I did decide to lose the weight, I made some very "Selfish" decisions, that people didn't expect of me. I quit staying late at work if there was work to be done because I knew I had to be home and on the treadmill by 6pm. I stopped eating out. My husband's family eats out, I swear, once a week!! I told my husband to go and have fun and i told my inlaws, "I don't eat at restaraunts", if you guys want to come over, I got some scrumpshie turkey burgers!!!! LOL, they always refused, but do you see how that is being selfish???? To me, I looked it as I eat healthy, I don't eat crap, if you don't like it-oh well. People kept asking me-how are you losing all this weight. I told exactly what I told you.
It's ok to be a little selfish to be healthy. I am so scared of dying also, or something going wrong, but going into this surgery I chose a surgeon with over 20yrs experience and he has the lowest complication rate in our state. I told him-I chose you because if I die-I will come back and get you. LOL!!!!! I think he thought I was serious for a second even LOL!!!!! I started working out now-doing what I can anyway and it has helped me mentally-I want to FIGHT to lose this weight!!!! I'm pissed off and I don't want it to control me physically or mentally anymore. I know I will also probably need PS, but I can't worry about it now. I will have to cross that bridge when it comes. I know I said a lot, but I hoped it helped some. My 6 months will also be up in Oct. this yr., so I am thinking my surgery will be very close to yours. If you ever want to talk, just send me a message!!!!!