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Need Encouragement

Pamela M.
on 5/11/15 12:58 pm - Atlanta, GA
VSG on 08/25/14

I apologize right up front for whining but I need some encouragement.  I have 12 more lbs. to go before goal and I feel a little discouraged.  This little negative creature sitting on my shoulder keeps saying "This is it.  You ain't going one bit further.  You'll never lose these last 12 pounds because it is your destiny to always be overweight."  Even though I have lost a total of 76 lbs. in 9.5 months, I keep focusing on what I have not accomplished.  I suppose I need some therapy but oh dear Lord I HATE the thought of trying to find a therapist.  Been there done that and I can't stand the process of finding the "right" therapist.  Any encouraging words would be most appreciated.  Did anyone struggle with this negativity as you approached getting closer to goal?  Thanks for listening and again, I apologize for whining.  I love all my fellow OH posters!

       

The price of anything is the amount of life you exchange for it.   Henry David Thoreau

Ready2goNOW
on 5/11/15 1:11 pm

Hi!

 

I wouldn't worry about whining about this...it is frustrating when you have come so far.

I am pre-op and would tickled to have lost 76 pounds so I think you're being hard on yourself! You are still under the year mark so plenty of time to lose those remaining pounds. Just stay on track...it is very discouraging to me as a pre-op to read posts where ppl complain about not losing while admitting they have been 'cheating' thru out the process.

SMH...

I think we can all benefit from therapy...this is a truly life changing process and therefore can be difficult to get used to. I know that I have learned a lot these past few months from just reading posts. Like how screwed up my thinking had gotten and how bad my self-esteem is. Always beating myself up...or accepting bad behavior...even from myself, and then 'making it better' by eating.

There had to be a better way!

So I wish you luck. You have already accomplished ALOT! Pat yourself on the back & chill.

Kathy

Ready2goNOW
on 5/11/15 1:13 pm

Hi!

 

I wouldn't worry about whining about this...it is frustrating when you have come so far.

I am pre-op and would tickled to have lost 76 pounds so I think you're being hard on yourself! You are still under the year mark so plenty of time to lose those remaining pounds. Just stay on track...it is very discouraging to me as a pre-op to read posts where ppl complain about not losing while admitting they have been 'cheating' thru out the process.

SMH...

I think we can all benefit from therapy...this is a truly life changing process and therefore can be difficult to get used to. I know that I have learned a lot these past few months from just reading posts. Like how screwed up my thinking had gotten and how bad my self-esteem is. Always beating myself up...or accepting bad behavior...even from myself, and then 'making it better' by eating.

There had to be a better way!

So I wish you luck. You have already accomplished ALOT! Pat yourself on the back & chill.

Kathy

Pamela M.
on 5/11/15 1:15 pm - Atlanta, GA
VSG on 08/25/14

Thanks for your encouragement.  I think there should be a special board called "Head Games People Play" - it would be nice to share with one another what we are collectively learning in therapy.  Of course, that would mean that I have to actually start going to therapy.  Sigh sigh. Do you have a surgery date yet?

       

The price of anything is the amount of life you exchange for it.   Henry David Thoreau

Ready2goNOW
on 5/11/15 4:30 pm

I hear you about the head games/therapy...lol!

I started therapy again a few months ago, but fortunately I worked with this therapist before so I didn't have to go looking. Frankly, I am tired of therapy at my age...been through it off & on for 30 years with an ex, my kids, my g'daughter and now myself!

I'm surprised I passed the psych eval without them putting a 72 hour hold on me

I had to do the 6 month nutrition classes. Halfway there. Expect surgery should take place in September once insurance gets and reviews all my paperwork.

Kathy

mmsmom
on 5/11/15 1:17 pm - Woburn, MA
with

Just keep trying.  I got stuck 1.6 lbs above my goal - and became obsessed by it - tried to do Dukan, low-carb, etc... finally when I stopped obsessing and went back to my "normal vsg eating" no only did the 1.6 lbs come off but another 2- 2.5.  You have done great!!  My doctor said exercise is the key to the last few lbs but I didn't change anything - however, I have upped my walking this spring to make maintaining easier.  Good luck, you can do it!

     VSG on 04/28/2014 

Pamela M.
on 5/11/15 1:20 pm - Atlanta, GA
VSG on 08/25/14

Do you mind sharing how long it took you to reach goal?

       

The price of anything is the amount of life you exchange for it.   Henry David Thoreau

kairk
on 5/11/15 1:54 pm

Hi Pamela,

No apologies needed. You're not whining at all!

The first thing I would do is track everything you are eating just as you are eating. Don't change a thing. Do this for say three days. Three days of average eating will give you an overview of the eating habits in which you engage. (I have done this periodically and found I was eating several HUNDRED more calories than I was estimating.) The only way to change what you're doing is to know what it is you're doing. So many of us march blindly into an eating plan without considering what wasn't working with the last one. I think this is a great exercise.

You'll also be able to see your trend of protein to fat to carb ratio. If your carbs are a little too high for your protein intake (for your liking, not anyone else) adjust them down. Sometimes to get to goal we need to drop calories and carbs because the current calorie level is actually a maintenance level for your new thinner weight.

ANTs = Automatic Negative Thoughts

Every time you engage in ANTs, immediately follow the thought with a conscious, "yeah, but look what I HAVE ....." After a while the negative thinking begins to take a back seat to the positive thinking.

You have done a great job so far. It's going to take hard work and a conscious effort to lose the last 12 pounds. You can do it. Laser focus, girl!

Kairk,
HW - 278,  GW <180   

Our compulsions hold the truths to lessons waiting to be learned. 
             

Bella_Fein
on 5/11/15 4:53 pm - TX
VSG on 02/18/13

I like what Kairk said "conscious effort". That is oh so very true. I am a bit over 2 years out and have yet to hit goal. I stay about 5-10 pounds from it in fact. BUT! It's my fault. I know what I need to do and I just don't. I can do it and so can you. So don't let that little guy on your shoulder tell you otherwise. Get it girl!

LilySlim Weight loss tickers

 

Dan1962
on 5/11/15 5:19 pm - Syracuse, NY
VSG on 09/23/14

Every time I slow, I just have to review what I'm eating and how active I am and its right in front of me what I have to do.  Two months ago I was convinced, this it it...no more... and then I got honest and I've dropped another 12 pounds since.  Think back to how happy you were in the beginning, and how enthusiastic, recapture that and you will get over the hump!  Good Luck!