Starting the journey

I am in the midst of pre-op testing and preparation for a VSG. I'm 68 years old and, frankly, quite desperate at this point in my life to discontinue the roller coaster ride of weight losses and gains I've had since adolescence. I'm anxious about so many things and have questions. Was there post-op pain? Did anyone have food cravings and, if so, how were they handled? What happens with hair loss? How do people handle social situations that involve food (as most do)? How does one respond to well meaning friends who try to discourage the surgery? I have a list of questions to ask my surgeon and other providers, but I would like to hear from others who have had WLS. Thank you so much!

Hello and welcome! Congrats to you for pursuing this.

Was there post-op pain? - Pain is different for everyone post-op, so it's hard to know what your own pain will be like. I did have pain, but not a lot and it was easily managed with pain medication. I was only taking pain meds around the clock for 2 days and then switched to only just before bed for another 2 days, if I recall correctly. I was able to walk as soon as I was moved to my room in the hospital post-op, so the pain was never so bad that I felt I couldn't move.

Did anyone have food cravings and, if so, how were they handled? - Sure, definitely. I've handled them in a number of ways. I see a therapist, and have since I started the whole process, so that's a GREAT help. The surgery changes our stomachs, but we've got to work hard to change our brains. I work to ignore them and realize that just because I crave something doesn't mean I have to do anything about it. Then I was diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder 2 years after surgery, so I take medication for that. Keeping busy also helps with the "ignoring it" thing. Basically, it boils down to the fact that surgery won't fix your brain.

What happens with hair loss? - Google "telogen effluvium." Hair loss after major trauma is normal because, in a nutshell, your body says, "OMG, MAJOR TRAUMA!!! Don't waste energy on useless things like hair!!" It passes, your hair starts growing again. Knowing that this was likely, I opted to shave my head to raise money for St. Baldricks about 6 weeks post-op. Amusingly enough, I really like having short hair with my new, thin face, so I've kept it short ever since.

How do people handle social situations that involve food (as most do)? - I started seeking out social situations that DON'T involve food as much. So that's helped a lot. And, honestly, for the situations that do, people either know me well enough that they know I've had surgery and am working to lose weight so that I eat "weird." Or they don't know me and don't notice that I'm eating "weird" anyway. So it works out well. It's rare that I'm in a food situation and there's nothing that I can eat - I stick to protein and it has never been a problem. If it's a gathering where the food is in a central location, I do tend to position myself away from the food, so that I can't hear it calling my name :P

How does one respond to well meaning friends who try to discourage the surgery? - I didn't tell people I was having surgery beforehand. Well, I told my partners, my parents, my brother, my three best friends, and some service providers who needed to know like my voice teacher and massage therapist. But mainly I only told people who needed to know in case I died - like I didn't want my brother to find out I was having surgery when he got a call with bad news, if you know what I mean.

When I did tell these people, I made sure to say, "I'm doing this." Not "I'm thinking about doing this" or any sort of phrase that left room for discussion or doubt. If I had gotten discouragement from people, which I didn't, I would have opted for "Thanks for sharing your concern with me" followed by complete subject change. "Did you catch Game of Thrones last night? Can you believe they killed [list of names here]?!" (Or whatever subject change you opt for. Always use the same one - people will get the hint eventually that weight loss surgery isn't up for debate.)

But I do recommend waiting to tell people until after surgery. That way no one can try to talk you out of it. :)

Again, welcome!

Take careful note of what Gwen says

I made sure to say, "I'm doing this." Not "I'm thinking about doing this" or any sort of phrase that left room for discussion or doubt.

Personally I had very little pain post op but everyone has a different experience. I still have cravings but am learning to find other things to occupy my time..puzzles, reading, taking a walk. If I crave something sweet sometimes I will have a sugar free popsicle or turn a chocolate protein shake into a "slushy" that helps usually. I have had hair loss but I get regular trims and take a Biotin every day and the loss has slowed and I can see many new hairs starting to grow back. My hairdresser said everything was looking good. For social situations I try to plan ahead and know where I am going and what food will be available..but just in case I take along a protein shake or something so that I don't feel tempted to go off plan. I was pretty open about having surgery..I mean I didn't announce it to the world, but I told most family, friends, co-workers, people from church..anyone important to me that I knew would support me. And on the rare occasion I encounter someone who doesnt approve I just let them have their say and make it clear that it was my decision, and that it wasnt up for discussion or negotiation and that I dont need their approval or permission..and I don't regret it one little bit!

Welcome :) I had / have all the same fears and concerns that it seems everyone else has. Added to that I worried about my age - 63 - and that I started out close to 500 pounds.

Surgery was June 29th and overall the experience has been very doable. I've had my moments of pain, moments of confusion, moments of burping but the weight that I've already lost has made it all worth while.

Non-scale victory - the snaps for the beauty shop cape was smaller! I fit in the chair.

Listen to your team. Remind yourself why this is important and you'll find that you can do this.

HW - 472 Today - 387.8

Started the journey Nov 21, 2016 / Surgery June 29, 2017

It was 61 when I had WLS. For me, the pain was minimal. I used the pain pump in the hospital for a day, then switched to Tylenol based pain killers for another 2-3 days.

I did not lose hair. I guess some do and some don't. I didn't tell anyone at work about the surgery at first, though I did once I got to goal and was feeling comfortable about doing so. With my close friends I did what White Dove suggested. I just told them I was having it (not that I was thinking about having it) and if they expressed concerns, I told them that I had educated myself and that it was the best thing for me to do to improve my health.

At food oriented social situations I eat protein. That keeps me from eating the other "bad" stuff too much. However now that I am in maintenance I might have a small amount of something like a dessert (a bite or two), after I've had my protein and that satisfies me.

I do crave foods, but what I crave has shifted to items that I eat regularly for the most part and most of them are protein based so my sleeve makes me feel full before I can go too crazy. My biggest problem is when one of my former food "loves" are in the house (baked goods, breads, pies). I need to have someone hide them or get them out of the house. BUT if I succumb I usually don't feel well before I've eaten a ton (unlike pre-WLS).

Bottom line is that I wish I had done this a long time ago. It was the best thing I could have ever done for my health. A nice by-product is that I look younger with the 100+ pounds gone.