I broke all the WLS rules

Over the last three days I grazed on slider foods, did not eat protein first, and drank tea with food. I ate 1200-1300 calories per day. I did keep carbs below 20-30g, but that's basically the only rule I didn't break. I made keto fudge and uncontrollably ate all 12 servings over the course of 2 days. I made kale chips and ate an entire bunch of kale in 1 day. I had bites of fruit while feeding my baby.

This is a slippery slope to never making it to goal and gaining all my weight back. Why the hell am I sabotaging myself? I'm going to stop it right now. Tomorrow will be protein first, 3 measured and logged meals of eggs and meat and 1 seaweed snack.

I need to get my motivation and will power back! What do you do to reinvigorate your motivation?

I sympathize. I'm sorry you're going through this. I've been there. It sucks.

I think what you are planning for tomorrow is just what I would do. Part of what we have to learn is picking ourselves back up and getting back on that train. Also, stop making that fudge- clear trigger food for you. Keep the triggers out. :)

The biggest thing that has been (so far) successful for me, is making my house a safe space. I simply don't make anything, bring anything into, or allow myself to eat anything off-plan while in my house. I don't know why this works for me, but it does. Now, since I'm in maintenance there are things "on plan" that there might not be for folks in WL stage. For instance, I eat Halotop Ice Cream occasionally.

This allows me to very occasionally indulge outside the house, but know that when I come home it's all business. This also works for me because I eat out very rarely.

I learned a similar lesson to what I think you just learned, which is "on plan" treats are the devil for me. I just can't limit them. I made some "banana cookies" once and ate them all in two days. Same thing with a banana oatmeal muffin. Sure, they were in plan and under 100 calories. Doesn't matter if you eat a half dozen of them!!

Now I just don't make "treats". Honestly I'm better off having a small, off plan treat when I'm out of the house.

This weekend we we went to the apple orchard and I had half of a donut and like 3 sips of cider. That off-plan snack was WAY better for me than eating a ton of on-plan snacks!!!

I will tell you that I took a different approach to this. I planned treats and made them part of my day.

I had an ice cream maker and made protein ice cream every day. I made all kinds of mug muffins with flaxseed instead of flour. I made cookies out of sugar-free pudding, egg, and low-carb baking mix. I made a cream cheese, no sugar fudge.

I would eat those things instead of, not in addition to meals. It was a phase for me and it kept me from eating real sugar treats. It might not be right for everyone. Let me know if you are interested.

I agree with this- I did the same. I just had to be careful the planned treats were not triggers :0)

Fudge , not amazing, but you binged on Kale, bet you never thought you would hear your self say that in your life time? You will get back on it :P