Newly single, scars

Matilda65
on 7/17/15 10:50 am

Hi everyone,

I had an open RNY in 2000, and after loosing weight, a panni and breast reduction. After ending a 20 year relationship, I'm starting to date. I had my surgeries done in Canada and along with the BIG vertical scar from the RNY, I've got a horizontal scar from the panniculectomy (a bit uneven, I guess you get what you pay for), as well the normal breast reduction scars. 

As you can imagine, I'm not sure how to answer questions about this and would prefer not to advertise that I've had wls.  I'd love to hear your thoughts. Thanks in advance.

Gwen M.
on 7/17/15 3:03 pm
VSG on 03/13/14

I'd advise being honest when it comes up.  

VSG with Dr. Salameh - 3/13/2014
Diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder and started Vyvanse - 7/22/2016
Reconstructive Surgeries with Dr. Michaels - 6/5/2017 (LBL & brachioplasty), 8/14/2017 (UBL & mastopexy), 11/6/2017 (medial leg lift)

Age 42 Height 5'4" HW 319 (1/3/2014) SW 293 (3/13/2014) CW 149 (7/16/2017)
Next Goal 145 - normal BMI | Total Weight Lost 170

TrendWeight | Food Blog (sort of functional) | Journal (down for maintenance)

Laura in Texas
on 7/18/15 8:32 am

If you are at the point of being naked with someone, I would hope you could be honest about having surgery, if asked about your scars. He may not ask and just assume they are from plastic surgery.

Laura in Texas

53 years old; 5'7" tall; HW: 339 (BMI=53); GW: 140 CW: 170 (BMI=27)

RNY: 09-17-08 Dr. Garth Davis

brachioplasty: 12-18-09 Dr. Wainwright; lbl/bl: 06-28-11 Dr. LoMonaco

"May your choices reflect your hopes and not your fears."

Michele1az
on 9/30/15 4:52 pm - Mesa, AZ
RNY on 08/26/13

Hi, Laura!

 

I just noticed that you are so skinny. We are the same height and had the same starting weight, but I have only gotten down to 219, now 225. I was down to 219 within the first 6 months and then nothing. I just had my 2 year anniversary in August. 

What has worked for you? Any tricks or secrets? 

 

[email protected]

 

Michele in Arizona
   

Surgery:8-26-13

AmyTail
on 7/29/15 11:50 am

You can always just say that you have lost a significant amount of weight.... at this point maybe he doesn't need to know "how".  If your relationship progresses you may consider telling him eventually.  Besides, you are not lying.  You DID loose a lot of weight , by eating right and exercising.  You can talk about your tool later if you are comfortable.  Just my thoughts.  ; )

(deactivated member)
on 9/3/15 12:53 pm

It probably won't be a big deal to hm as it is to you - most guys are so delighted having accessto a  nekkid or near nekkid woman theyre half in love with here not even noticing the flaws .  Later the question may come up and you can be honest to whatever degree you feel comfortable with .  I don't think anyone needs to know everything about their mate .. how BORING and unsexy ! 

I have had guy ask me if I lost a significant amount of weight- whether thats where my loose skin came from GRRR ... I still didn't cop to bariatric surgery though I was planning to marry the guy.  Its not his business is the way I feel. 

Then again I didn't tell my family when i had surgery either because I knew they would be totally unsupportive .  I don't need anyone around me playing self-appointed food police or telling me I'm cross-addicted ( I don't drink anymore though as of a year ago) .  Why give someone the ammunition to hurt you with in arguments or try to control you using ?  

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