hubby slipping

(deactivated member)
on 12/2/09 5:28 pm
My husband had RNY in Jan with great success.  He rolled right thru, lost over 100 pounds, feels great, working out, all that good stuff.  But lately, he has started snacking - ALOT.  I have found him up eating at 1am.  He often takes a snack to bed!  I just had RNY from the same surgeon and I know that is not in the plan!  I have two fears - one is that he is totally going to wreck his progress and give up.  The other is, in a year from now, when I CAN eat things again, I am going to want to because he is.  Kind of like, its only fair of you get to eat ice cream, why can't I.  I know this is not intelligent, but I have had these "fairness" issues in our marriage before.  I don't want us to both end up unhealthy, unhappy and blaming each other. 
amystiles
on 12/17/09 12:18 pm

Hey there, I am actually up right now, can't sleep, because my husband and I just had a huge talk about me being concerned about him slipping. It sounds so similar to your post, just like you, he lost the weight, very quickly, and was so focused and things were going great. This summer, he began snacking and grazing, and gained 10 pounds. He has not taken if off, and I am watching him make unhealthy choices. On a bright note, he has not gained any more weight. I am at a loss as of what to do for him. I celebrate the fact that he was so successful, but I hold my breath because I have watched him for 14 years struggle with his weight.
I am so thankful to read your post because I felt like I no one would understand my point of view.
Hang in there! And best of luck to you with your RNY recovery and success.

jewel-twin
on 12/6/12 9:02 am - Canada
I think its not helpful to be the food police! I think you should bring his attention to it! Perhaps suggest that if he is interested he might want to consider some therapy ....

But if you try to control it..it will get worse for both of you!!!

You can only control yourself! If you have issues with tit for tat with him...you need to find a way to work on that so you don't fall into that pit fall!!

Being the wife is sometimes difficult..we often feel like we succeed and fail as a unit rather then as an individual...but with WLS..its completely individual!!

Good luck!!

Family Dr. 06/05/2012    Referral Received 06/28/2012 Orientation 08/01/2012   NP 08/27/2012
SW 08/28/2012              Nut Class 08/27/2012
NUT 10/01/2012              PS 10/01/2012
Surgeon Dr. Cyriac 12/07/2012  **SURGERY  JAN 30, 2013**

fooh.png

 

(deactivated member)
on 12/17/09 4:14 pm
I have tried lately to switch tactics.  I encourage healthy choices whenever I can, and I try to do it without nagging or berating.  We talk a lot about our sons health.  He is 10 and while he is not overweight, he is certainly at risk, and does have a tiny bit of a belly.  My hubby is doing the grocery shopping right now, as I am not over my surgery yet.  He has been getting a lot of fruit and I noticed a pile of protein bars he set out to take to his office.  Being a firefighter, I can imagine it is hard to stick to healthy eating at work.  They frequently eat a big family style meal there for work, and it is not always the best health wise.  But at least he is thinking about it now.  I also have tired to brag about him, and let him know.  He has lost a lot of weight, and he does look good!  I let him know that he has done something great for his health and it is worth keeping!
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