Before:



In Progress ( I still weigh over 300 pounds but always lose in my face first!):

Please let me know if you are having trouble viewing my blog or pictures.  The material below has been copied and pasted over from the old format so it will be from the beginning to the most recent entries before the format change.  -These were my blog entries before 2007.

03/24/05:  UPDATED 12/05/07
I am a 34 year old mother of three. I would say I am mostly known for being a joker and downright silly sometimes, but that's what keeps me sane :) I have been a stay at home mom for many years now and although I have some college, and I have had a couple jobs on and off over the years, home seems to be where I am needed most. My children are ages 10 to 15.

As far as my weight, I have pretty much been overweight since the birth of my first child. I wish I would have appreciated myself the way I was at 160 lbs, then maybe I wouldn't have gained to begin with. I always gained weight after the births of my children for some reason, not much during the actual pregnancies. So I would say being 5'8 and 160lbs pounds was not horrible at the beginning, but about 6 months after the birth of my 1st child, I was up to 210lbs and it just went up from there. I lost here and there and even 80lbs once, only to gain again. From my BMI, you can tell that I am now dangerously overweight at 371lbs.

I have been dealing with symtoms of Lupus or as I was rediagnosed with UCTD, which is a fancy way of saying I fall into many catagories including Lupus and other connective tissue diseases. They say I carry the anti-nuclear antibody..(I think God has other plans though for me :)...I did take some meds that were originally prescribed for me back when they told me I had UCTD, but didn't like the way they made me feel. I have also been on prednisone on and off and I can tell you it's not a nice drug. I am trying to get as many meds outta of my life as possible, although I have had to take some pretty nasty things. I feel that with prayer and taking care of my body, anything is possible! I do currently have mildly high BP and my iron has been low, but my PCP and I are working on different options and trying to get that back up. I was also recently diagnosed with hypothyroid and I'm taking meds for that, which although at first caused some weight loss, I am noticing a distubing trend in my appetite. It has really picked up and I find myself waking up in the middle of the night hungry. Not a good sign and I am doing everything I can to control this.

As far as my life history, I am adopted but I have met my biological mother and sister. I also know the medical history of my father and other brothers and sisters as well through my bio mother. Most of them are overweight ranging from 200 to 500 pounds at times. Some of them have diabetes and most of them don't have a very good track record of keeping weight off once lost. BTW, the woman who adopted me at birth is the most awesome mother I could have ever asked for, God bless her always and forever!

I was always considered a little tall and a little bigger boned, but not very many people called me "Fat" growing up. I carry most of my weight in my hips and legs, so i could get away with wearing skirts as my ankles were always thin...lol...I hid myself well and tried to blend in, but never enjoyed wearing bathing suits or mini-skirts or shorts. I did my best to camoflauge the real me as I never felt I would truly be accepted. Maybe it's body image, but I never felt I was in a normal body, even when I wasn't overweight. I am at the point now though that as long as I can be healthy, I feel I can live with that. BOY COULD I LIVE WITH THAT!!! Being healthy has to come first, and I have really searched my motives on why I want to loose this weight. I am not healthy this way. I am not a functioning mother or wife. This has got to change.

As far as my spirituality, I struggle to find anything in the Bible regarding WLS. I suppose it's up to each individual and their own intimate relationship with God. He is the foundation of my life and the decisions I make. I am doing a lot of research on this surgery and praying about His will for me.

I honestly can say I have tried to loose this weight on my own, but I always think I could have done better. Sound familiar? I could have tried harder, I could have denied myself more. I could have starved myself for longer. I mean isn't this dieting? We try so hard. I can say that in the past I felt I could loose this weight, but these past few attempts, I am actually shocked that my scale is no longer moving downwards and I am starting to think my body is doing everything it can to stay where it's at. I have read a lot about this and about ghrenlin, (spell check) the hormone that the stomach produces in order to keep a person's body from loosing weight. In addition to understanding this hormone and what it might be doing to me, there is also the issue with adequate exercise. Everytime I start exercising, something breaks under my weight, or I strain or tear a muscle. My doc is starting to think I need to loose about 100 pounds before I can really exercise without hurting myself. Walking is great, but at times my legs swell with inflamation and I have been bed ridden for days. Without a life change, I could keep doing this for years. I DO NOT WANT TO LIVE THIS WAY ANYMORE.

I don't intend to tell very many people I know that I am having the surgery. Most people I know wouldn't understand and would just think I took the easy road out. I challenge them to sit in my head for a few days. This is not an easy way out, this is a really hard crossroad in my life. It's a huge sacrifice and I can NEVER GO BACK.

I feel comfortable with the surgeon I have found as it is stated that he is in the top 5 in the nation and has a death rate of .05%. He has his own wing in the hospital just for bari patients and from the seminars/meetings I have attended, everyone is so pleased with him. I did get one email from someone recently stating that his complication/infection rate is high, but when I asked this person for more details, they were reluctant to provide them :( I have done all the research I can and it seems someone has something negative to say about every surgeon I have researched. I guess I have to go by averages and overall credibility.

As far as my insurance goes, that's a really long story...I started out 15 months ago and applied for coverage. BCBS of Illinois PPO said they wanted a 12 month supervised diet. I had many years history for them, but it wasn't exactly what they wanted. They wouldn't pay for a dietician, only a PCP, so I have done what I could on my own seeing weight specialists and PCP's over the last 15 months. My PCP that I have had since Oct 2004 is very supportive. He is getting all my med history together and going to resubmit any day now, so it's ultimately up to God now. I will continue to do my best with diet and exercise on my own.

@---->-------Renee

03/27/05 EASTER SUNDAY:

I would like to think of you all as sort of a WLS family and so I am sharing this with you all. It might even help someone, as this whole tragedy probably could have been prevented. I am off to the hospital this morning to be with my ex-mother in law. She had WLS 2 years ago at age 60, her name is Paula. Her son, my ex, is in California and she is the grandmother to my two oldest children and had recently asked me to be POA over here because she was in a nursing home. She had RNY at UC med center in California and moved herself and her parents out here to Oklahoma shortly after. She wanted to be closer to her sister who lives here and also to her grandchildren--my kids. Her son really isn't in the picture, that's a whole story in itself which I will not go into except to say that her falling out with him did contribute to her depression. Her sister is now busy taking care of the parents and so I am really the only one she has here in Oklahoma. She had this surgery to be able to do more with her grandchildren and to have a hope for the future. Unfortunitely, Paula didn't follow all the advice that doctors along the way tried to give her. Shortly after her surgery, we were told her pouch had been made too small and she vomitted constantly. Even when she wasn't vomitting, her relationship with food had become that of fear because of the way it made her feel. So, even though there were times she could eat, she didn't. Over the past year she was in and out of the hospital serveral times, each time they explained to her that if she didn't eat and drink, she would die. She moved closer to me into a rest home up the street from my house. I had hopes that she would have something to look forward to and I tried to get my daughter down to the nursing home as much as possible to see her. I got her any and all food that sounded good to her as often as I could when she didn't like what they were servering there at the home. Last night she was taken to the hospital again and this morning the doctor called me and gave her a 20% chance to live and said that if they put her on a vent, she would never get off it. Her organs are failing as she has no muscle left in her body. Her heart is a muscle. She also has developed Sepsis, an infection in the blood. Not sure how she got this, whether by a low immune system or perhaps even a leak, although I doubt she would have a leak 2 years out from WLS. This is not how I want my 13 year old daughter to remember her nana, and not how I want her to remember Easter. I am so sad. What I am most sad about is that she had SO many chances to turn things around, but she just wouldn't eat. The doc said there is no physical reason, so he feels it's mental. Please take care of your bodies if you decide to have this surgery, but MOST importantly, take care of your minds and maintain a healthy relationship with food, no matter how you feel about it at first. I am not sure how this will effect my desire to have WLS. Paula encouraged me to have it, even telling me that things went wrong for her because she didn't do what they told her to. I don't know what I think, I just know this is the hardest day of my life.

Update: It's now evening on Easter Sunday and I am back home with my daughter. Paula left us a little after 2pm today. She is finally free. I have so much to think about. My daughter and myself were the only ones there when she passed. I have never seen someone die. All I can say is that you can feel when the soul leaves a body. There is a void that I cannot explain. It's very spiritual. In those final moments, we truly loved her and I remember looking into her eyes and telling her it was okay to let go. I could see her suffering and I feel she could tell we were there because right after my daughter took her hand and said goodbye, she was off to heaven. God bless her.

I have to figure out how to get my daughter through this and how this affects my thoughts on WSL...Was this a sign from God? Or an example of how not to handle things after WLS?...I am so confused right now. I am just empty and sad.

05/26/05:
Been a while, I have posted a lot on the boards, but haven't updated my profile lately. Well time has come and gone and I have picked myself up and moved on with my WLS quest. I will never forget the lessons I learned through Paula's passing. As far as the status on WLS for me, I was denied by insurance because my dieting wasn't "intensive" enough...puleeez. How would they know? My PCP is furious and has made several calls on my behalf to the insurance company. Another 12 months of supervised dieting? I THINK NOT! I gave them 15 months already! They are just beating around the bush. I am getting an attorney, Gary V. He feels my diet history is adequate. I am praying for favor with Blue Cross Blue Shield of Illinois. I am reading a book by Joel Olsten about living my best life now, and claiming favor over all areas of my life.

I also got on a CPAP machine because a sleep study showed I had stopped breathing 70 times an hour. I am having a heck of a time with the different masks and nasal pillows I have tried. This is tough, but I am determined to stick with it. It's been almost 2 weeks with it and I have only had one night with over 4 hours keeping the mask on. I have to say, that the next day I could tell a huge difference in my energy level. Imagine how great I would feel if I actually kept the mask on for more than one night!

06/01/05:
Just got another denial letter from my insurance, seems they feel my doctor's diet wasn't low calorie enough--1200 calories isnt low enough, so they want me on optifast or medifast for 12 months. I don't know if I can afford meal replacements. I am pretty sure I am going with an attorney--Gary V., I just am afraid to spend all this money if I don't have a chance to come through it with a favorable result. Do insurance companies know what they put people through? DO THEY CARE??? It's hard enough to even come to the decision to have this scary surgery, but then to be jerked around like this...ridiculous. Sorry, just had to vent.

06/13/05:
I honestly don't know what's going on with me lately. I have been obsessing over whether to send off the money and paperwork to an attorney. I have spent so long wanting this surgery, and now that I feel I am getting closer to obtaining it, I am very nervous. I have a feel of doom when I think of going through with it. "God hath not given us the spirit of fear, but of power and love and a sound mind"...Are these thoughts I have fear, or persuation? I feel fearful when I think of the surgery. I have been praying for a very clear sign from God. I mean, really, how am I going to live a long life without this surgery? I can't do anything I wanted to for God in a body like this. I wanted to go to Bible college next year and I feel God has something in store for my life and I need to get myself into a position to be able to do these things. Should I try starving myself again and see if I can loose the weight on my own? I haven't been successful with this in the past, or I should say successful keeping it off. I just feel when God has a path for you, if you are still and quiet, He will clearly show you. Why am I having such a hard time hearing His answer? This is unusual.

06/14/05:
Feeling better today. I have to admit, the closer I am to God and the more I hear His word, the more I feel that He is with me and will go with me whatever I decide to do. It's like I can feel Him telling me, "Don't you know I've got you taken care of?" I can't wait to find out what he has in store for me.

06/15/05:
Well school is out and all three kids are home and at each other's throats..This is a little stressful, but I am glad to have them altogether. Getting a new CPAP mask soon. It's a full face. I have tried one out already. Seems like every mask I try whether nasal or full, leaks in the corners....Not sure why I can't find the right one. I have tried about 20!

06/24/05:
As some of you know, I have been jerked around by my insurance company for almost 2 years now. After taking some time and really thinking about things, I have decided that I am sick of living like this and waiting to live better. I have decided that while I wait out surgery, I am going to give lifestyle modification another try. I have decided to do the new modified version of medifast--5 and 1. It's 5 supplements--oatmeal/soups or shakes and one regular meal of lean meat/veggies a day. I have done some research, so I am not entering this blindly. It's a whole lot better than optifast in my opinion and my doctor will be supervising me. I have never been good about staying on something where I have to eat 6 times a day if I have to make the meals. So I guess it's good that 5 out of 6 meals a day are pretty much instant. It's a little bit like the eating plans I have seen some of you on post-op right after surgery. I am not going to pretend that this is as good as surgery, however, I am going to try to have a positive attitude and I would be so incredibly greatful if I could still have and share support with all of you fine people.

~Renee

08/02/05:
Today was day 1 on Medifast. I now weigh 383.4, so this is going to be a long road. Last night I sat down and really thought about my life. I never really realized how important some things had become. Things that should not have been top priority have somehow become my only priority. Saying goodbye to the ones that hurt me is not easy. Tonight I did the hardest thing I have ever done when it comes to food. I said goodbye to my longtime friends. The friends that comforted me when I cried and cheered me up when I felt I couldn't make it through the day. The friends that made me feel like I could do anything and that tomorrow would be different and that life had some hope. But when the morning came, I was left with the cold hard truth of another day passed that I had spent not living. My friends lied to me. They comforted me but when I wasn't looking, they stole my social life. When I wasn't paying attention, they tore down all of my personal successes and I was left with, without my health. I was left as a hermit, a prisoner in my own home. Afraid to even get the mail or go to the grocery store. I allowed these friends to charm their way into my life and make me think I couldn't live without them and in return I shut down my whole world for them and hid myself out of shame. I allowed my friends to become my only source of happiness. My friends, they had names...Chocolate Peanut Butter Cup, Chicken in an Bisket, Cheesecake, and don't forget Soda Pop. Oh they weren't the only ones, there was that sassy Pepperoni and those persistant tall Breadsticks all puffed up, drenched in butter, and looking like a million bucks. They all had a place in my life. Food became my 'human' companion'. I let them come live in my house with me. I had a whole room set up with a tv just in their honor. This became my artificial life. I was so true to my friends, including them in any fun activity because it wouldn't seem the same without them...or so I thought. I had to have them with me or life wasn't as tasteful, colorful, or even bearable....In real life, when we make friends and bring them into our lives, we make them important and in return we feel a sense of family and or of companionship. When a friend hurts us or tries to steal from us, why would we allow them to live in our home and stay at our side? What a fool I have been. I gave my life to poor food choices for over 20 years. It's time to say goodbye. Tomorrow is a new day, a new beginning, and my friends are no more. I can't tell you how many of my friends took their final journey down the garbage disposal this evening. It's time for a revival in every sense of the word. A Medifast revival!!! A revival of health and of spirit and of truth. Truth to your own self. Truth about where you have been and what choices you made and truth about the fact that you can't fool anyone, not even yourself. But also in this I have found truth: I AM A STRONG WOMAN who is capable of being true to myself and to honor the path set before me with a positive attitude and with a new sense of who I am and just what I am capable of. I CAN DO THIS.

Goodbye old friends, I am sure I will see you around, but you will no longer run my life. I RUN MY LIFE NOW. ........and it's about time

08/12/05:
Ok, just wanted to check in and say that I officially got through the first ten days and lost 12.2 pounds!!! Ok, I know the .2 is probably silly, but doggonit I am gonna say it...LOL... Thanks to Medifast and the wonderful people here. I appreciate all the support!!! My Health Advisor is sooooo cool! She advised me that I need to be eating 7 times a day instead of 6 and the weight seems to be coming off even faster. I learned something new this past week. Most of enjoyable eating comes from enjoyable smells first. I made pancakes for my kids this week and I picked them up, smelled them and felt the texture. I remember what pancakes taste like, but the smell and texture are the biggest parts to me and I feel like I had pancakes even though I didnt'...LOL... There is hope even without surgery. This is not just another diet. It's a way of life and I am not hungry at all. I can really do this and this is the first time I have known that for sure! Starting weight: 383.4, Today: 371.2.

WOOHOO

08/19/05:
Drum roll please.... I have lost another 4.2 pounds this week for a total of 16.4 pounds! WOOHOO. Ok, I had to toot my own horn. I am especially proud of these last 4.2 pounds because I am very swollen due to pms etc. I LOVE MEDIFAST!!!

Have a great weekend!

08/29/05:
This is so amazing! I feel like I had gastric bypass, even though I didn't! I am not hungry EVER. I do get mental hunger here and there, but I don't feel physically hungry at all. I can't believe I have been on this program for almost a month. It feels like it's only been a couple weeks or so. I am still so amazed that I am doing this and sticking to it. I thought that was NEVER possible. I am surprising myself and others around me. It's amazing what a little weight loss can do for the self confidence...lol...I still cannot believe this is working. This is the first time I have been on a program that has worked for this long and that is so easy that I actually see myself keeping with it. There is a real possibility that I am going to do it this time. My weigh in is Friday and I will let you know what the scale says! I just keep thanking God for sending me in this direction. Thank you JESUS! There IS hope after all.

09/11/05:
Well it's 9/11. So much comes to mind when this day comes around every year. I am so sorry for those that lost love ones and I wanted to let you know that those loved ones are still thought about often by at least one person. God Bless them every one.

On a happy note. I am down 24 pounds now and weigh in at 359. I am still in disbelief that this is working. I thank God every day that I found Medifast and my wonderful health advisor Lisa. She is so wonderful and caring. I couldn't ask for a better experience. I have had a couple times where I have had some things I should not have, but instead of gaining 5 pounds I gained nothing but more will power. I feel like I am repairing my metabolism. Instead of ruining it, I feel like I am speeding it up by eating complete meals 7 times a day. I think this is the longest period of time I have had COMPLETE and balanced nutrition for so many days in a row. I don't have to count calories or carbs or fat or anything. I am so lazy sometimes so this is pretty fail safe for me. I am not weak or shaky or even hungry. I know I keep saying this, but I feel like it's a miracle. I feel so blessed that this is working. I have lost weight before, but any slip ups meant magor weight gain because I had been starving myself. This is so different. I feel badly that there are some people out there who don't know that there is hope for them. There really is hope. My insurance denied me for surgery and I really thought is was the end for me. God had another plan and he has a plan for everyone. Don't give up hope, because there are answers. What I am doing may not be right for everyone, so I am not trying to tell people to go out and start Medifast. All I want to say is that whatever you do, don't give up hope. God Bless.

09/26/05:
Sorry I didn't post sooner. Sometimes I forget until I get emails saying "Hey, update your profile so we know how you are...". So here I am. Guess what!?!? I am down now to 353.8!!! I am 4/10ths of a pound away from 30 pounds lost! WOOHOO! I can't believe that a month and a half ago I was carrying around 30 more pounds! I can't even believe I am doing this without surgery. Yes, I have cheated a couple times. I am not going to lie. There was one time I had pizza when I knew better, but I sure paid for it in the bathroom afterwards. OMG. My heart raced and I got really shakey and sick to my stomach. I felt so nasty. I had the runs for hours and hours. At first I thought there was something wrong with the pizza but then figured out that after having such nutritious food for over a month, when I went to eat the crappy pizza, my digestive system said "heck no!". I confirmed this a couple weeks later when I tried some regular soda and again was sick for hours afterwards. I thought I was having a heart attack :O. So for me, this is a lot like WLS in the fact that I am never hungry and there seems to be some very obvious consequences to my eating the wrong things. I know of a few post-ops who ate things they should not have, but it didn't stop them from reaching their goals. They have a tool-surgery. They can mess up their tool. I have a tool also--Medifast. I can mess up my tool, or use it to the best of my ability. Either way, one can mess up the outcome if they want to badly enough. It's just a matter of getting into a position that self control is more attainable. Back to the pizza...I didn't even enjoy it. It was almost mechanical for me to eat it because it wasn't really for pleasure. It was as if I couldn't wait to be done with it so I could get back to the good stuff. That made me think a lot. After doing MF(Medifast) for 30 days, I had created a new habit and then when I ate the pizza, it was not part of my new habit; therefore it felt very uncomforable and hardly pleasurable. It actually was a relief to finish it and get onto my MF the next day. I was actually excited to get back into my routine. I think that mentally post-ops deal with this as well. Mental hunger is a big problem and some people have WLS and only realize afterwards that they still have to address the mental part of why they overate. I feel like I am more in control of my appetite so that I can make a clearer decision then I would have before I started this program. I tried WW and a bunch of other things and I pushed my limits every which way I could. On this program, I can't add a little more of this or that because it's already portioned for me. I eat what I am suppose to every 2 hours and that's it. I do get the lean and green meal, but that's a no brainer. There is no sugar in that so I don't feel any cravings and can hardly even finish my lean and green. Eating 7 times a day keeps me pretty darn busy..lol Thank God I don't have to cook 7 times a day though or we would have a huge problem..lol Surprisingly I can pretty much have a different medifast thingy every two hours. I really like the brown sugar maple oatmeal and the chicken and wild rice soup because it has wild mushrooms in it, YUM. What's crazy is I swore I would never do a pre-packaged diet because they are usually puffed up with water and packed with sodium. I am so sensitive to salt, so lucky for me there isn't hardly in this stuff. I pretty much like most of what they have to choose from, and I am pretty picky. I am satisfied with it, and I think I can do this and the modified program when I reach goal for the rest of my life. Gosh, I can't believe I just said that. I never thought I could do ANYTHING for the rest of my life...LOL

My family life is doing pretty good too. We decided to do more as a family and my hubby bought this cool bingo game and we lit up a disco ball and played music and the kids and I played bingo while my husband read the numbers off. There were even cash prizes LOL! That is the most fun we have had together in a long time. I am so thankful for the work that God is doing in my life. I am so glad I finally turned this all over to Him for once.

I also went to see my doctor last week and he was so pleased with what I am doing that he asked my Medifast Health advisor (Lisa Castro) for some information because he may want to offer Medifast to his patients. I can't believe that this is all happening. This man did everything he could to get me WLS. When that didn't work out he thought there wasn't much left for me to do because I had tried so many diets already. He couldn't believe how great I am doing and how good my blood pressure and labs were. What can I say? I am incredibly happy. That's my update.

09/26/05:
I know I am updating again in the same 24 hours, but I had such a breakthrough in my thinking today that I wanted to record it in my blog. Looking back over the years, I realize that I have justified anything and everything just so I could wait 'another day' to start my new life/diet. I would wait until the beginning of a new week to start every diet I had ever tried. Hey--Monday would be the best day to start and I had all my reasons lined up. Then I would do my new diet for about 1-2 days, go off and decide that I would start the next Monday. I gained probably 100 pounds waiting for my "Monday" to come. I would overeat every Saturday and Sunday because Monday was always coming and I wanted to make sure I tasted all the good stuff before I went on a diet. LITERALLY I overate every Saturday and Sunday for 7 years and gained 100 pounds because "Monday" was never something I realized I in fact had control over. One time I even asked my husband if he really thought I was overweight. He didn't want to talk about it at first but I begged him to really tell me what he thought. With tears in his eyes, he told me the truth and pleaded with me to do something about this because he didn't want me to die young. He had been carrying this for so long and when he finally let it all out, you know what I did? I used this as even another excuse to feel sorry for myself. I thought "I can't believe he said I was "morbidly obese"!!! I know I asked him to tell me the truth, but I can't believe he actually did! I have to comfort myself now. I bet no other woman has ever heard her husband say this...I am so offended. Poor me. " Looking back I think, poor him! He finally told me after I begged him, then I let him have it! Then I medicated myself into thinking I wasn't really as bad as he made it out to sound. When I finally realized who was in control, I realized that I was the one in charge. I am far from where I need to be but for the first time in my life I realize that no body and no thing made me gain the weight. I did. I controlled it then and I control it now. I decide where this goes and I can't fool myself anymore. "Monday" was a fairytale. A myth. The Sasquach of dieting for me. The real Monday finally came when I decided that it was my choice, no one else's. And you know what, it wasn't even a Monday, it was a Tuesday that was the magic day...LOL...My perception of what was ideal had kept me imprisoned in a cycle of failure.

10/21/05:
Hey there, I got a couple emails recently from some of you asking me where I have been. I have been starting my own business (180health dot and you probably can figure out the rest:) and I have been oh so busy! My health has taken a total 180 in the last 2.5 months!!! I am happy to report I have stayed on program the last couple of weeks, and I am doing great! I am down another 8 pounds, I have had all my water these last couple weeks and watched everything that has gone into my mouth. I feel more in control than I have in my whole life. Thanks for all of your support!

PS, I probably would have lost more but I just found out that my thyroid meds needed to be increased, so once that higher dose starts kicking in, I should be doing even better!

My daughter and I took some pictures of me today. I added one to the bottom of my profile here. We were not very good with lighting etc., but we both tried to hold the camera steady...lol... One of them I took myself. I felt a little vain, but you know what? I worked darn hard to lose this first 40 pounds, so I may still be big, but I am PROUD ;)

11/21/05:

Well well! Hello all! I am sorry I have not updated sooner, but life has been so fast lately. I am now down 52 pounds and more in control than I have been in my entire life. I am also happier than I have been in my entire life. I have more energy than I have had in ten years and I credit the program I am on and the fact that God led me to it. My tastes have truly changed. Things that I used to enjoy seem so drab when it comes to food. I can honestly say that I know this is the last diet I will ever be on. This isn't even a diet...lol...My life has changed forever. Not only have I met some wonderful people lately, but I feel like I have a purpose in life for the very first time.

Here are some pics I took the other day. I realize I have a long way to go, but dagnabit, I WILL GET THERE!

You will have to scroll down to the very bottom of this page to see the most up to day picture, but here is one I took today: