- Username: mommy-mo-mo
- Location: Lakewood, CA, USA
- Member Since: 5/14/2007
- BMI: 41.9
- Post Op
- Surgery Type: RNY (07/31/07)
- Surgeon: Mir Ali, M.D.
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Before & After
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- Family & Friends - Love my family, love my friends, love meeting new people.
- Fitness & Exercise - Hate it, but know I've got to start doing it.
- Dancing - Salsa and ballroom, hope to be doing more of it soon.
- Scrapbooks - Love scrapbooking.
- Cooking & Baking - Hate to cook, but want to like it.
- Outdoor - Hope to see that change as the weight comes off.
- Christianity - Thank you Lord for all my blessings and for this path of WLS.
- E-Bay - Tried to do it as a side business, maybe I will try again.
- Mary Kay - I sell it.
- WLS in your 40's - Just turned 43 ouch- July 15th (2007)
Enjoying Not Having to Eat.-It's Amazing on August 23, 2007 7:19 pm
Aug. 23, 2007
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Well today I just broke my one week plateau. I was stuck at a 23 pound loss and now I'm down 27 pounds. Very happy about that. Was not discouraged about the plateau because I knew to expect it at about the third week after reading from everyone's posts here.
What did catch me off guard was the fact that Tuesday I was now able to start pureeds. And what do I do my first day of pureeds, I don't eat anything. Finally at ten pm I had my regular Carnation Instant Breakfast. So for three days now, I've only been having maybe two or three liquids like CIB, or soup, and 1 serving of fat free refried beans.
I don't know what it is. On Tuesday I was so busy working on stuff in the house that when I got hungry I thought as soon as I'm done I'll get something. Then it passed and I kept working. I was so amazed that I did not get weak or nauseated or feel faint like so many times before when I would wait too long to eat. I feel great. I know this isn't good. Today is the third day. I am getting my liquids in. I think I'm also a little scared to try stuff, like scrambled eggs that I'm supposed to have, but I don't think that is the real reason. I have not had any food issues so far and I don't wanna. I've been doing really good. I was following my doctors food plan pretty good until it switched to pureeds.
The other reason might be that I don't want to prepare anything for myself and maybe this is where I need tough love. I hate cooking. I used to eat fast food all the time. Since I can't grab fast bad food I'm not grabbing anything at all. I think that's probably the real truth. I know I need to work through this. I have to just do it.
I'm a little frustrated about that yet kind of intrigued by the fact that I don't feel like eating since I've never felt that before in my life. It's so wonderful to not feel like I have to shove something in my mouth or I will die- throw up (because of the diabetes). I'm loving that I can only eat four ounces, but now I'm finding it easier to just not eat. How crazy is that?
Today I had 3 oz chile beans- YUMMY, 4oz CIB with choc soy milk blended with ice -YUMMY, and a Kozy Shack SF chocolate pudding- YUMMY.
Anyone have any input, please don't yell at me. Anyone go through this. I'm not really discouraged other than I know I need to eat to live, but I do wish I liked to cook. I really want to like to cook. I love looking at Michelle V (eggface's website and Charlie's website. The pictures are so pretty and I think how nice it would be to make it. I even collect recipes here on the website, but when it comes down to it, I don't like to prepare anything food wise. So now I find it's easier to do nothing.
Okay I'll stop rambling. I think it helped me to sort through this in my mind. I need to get my bum in the kitchen and prepare foods.
Okay I'll stop help me please
I really am very happy with my progress so far. Thank you so much for letting me share.
Diet Coke Addiction!!!!! on August 23, 2007 9:20 am
Someone posted today asking about how to get rid of the diet coke addiction. This is my response to the original post and since I was truly addicted I thought people who read my blogs may also be addicted so this is what I did and it worked well for me.
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Okay, here is my story. I was drinking about 6 cans a day. I loved my diet coke. I drank up until the day of surgery. I had soooooooooooooooo many people tell me I should start weaning. I said don't worry I will do what I need to do when the time comes to do it. Why do I want to drink less now, when I know that I will never have them again. So I ENJOYED MY DIET COKE. And with the surgery coming up for me, I enjoyed my diet coke GUILT FREE. I knew that part of my commitment to my surgery and weight loss was that I would never have carbonated beverages again. So I made sure to appreciate and enjoy every last can of diet coke. Even on the day before surgery when is was liquids only, my plan says carbonated beverages optional, so you can be sure I had my diet coke.
After the surgery, have not had one. There are still some even sitting in my house. I've missed it a little bit, but I've been drinking so much water with flavor powders (that are soooooooo yummy) that I've been doing fine. I am 23 days post op today and not one diet coke.
While in the hospital and about two days at home, I did have a pretty bad headache, that the nurses gave me some meds for. It might have been caffeine related or just surgery related. But if that was the only side effect to having my diet coke up to the day of surgery, then it was well worth it.
Also one more word, when I had my psych eval done, the psych also had surgery and he said he didn't stop until the day of surgery and he said, "don't worry you'll be fine."
I hope this helps.
PS. Enjoy your diet coke while you can because if you are committed to this surgery, you should not be having any after surgery. It honestly has not been a problem for me.
Three Week Update!!!!! on August 20, 2007 10:32 pm
Aug. 20, 2007 - I am back at home. I had been staying with my mom. It was a little hard being there without my dad there, but it was good for both me and my mom. Had some really good quality time and bonding.
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Her strength amazes me. She has to go on. She is alone in the house. She has never lived alone in her whole life. She is a very beautiful woman. She is social, has lot's of friends, and a strength about her that is something to be admired. It's good to be home and begin living my new life.
I CAN SLEEP THROUGH THE NIGHT NOW without having to get up to go to the bathroom and no GERD. I LOVE IT. I think my body clearing itself of all the toxic food I put in my mouth has made a world of difference. I was drinking about 6 cans of diet coke a day. I know BAD. Have not had any caffeine since the day before surgery. I miss it a little, but there are so many yummy powders to put it my water that I get to experience all kinds of flavors.
I feel great. My family and I are actually going out and doing things. Saturday went to Carlsbad to this rich lady's house who gave us some dining room chairs and we got to stay and hang out on the beach. I walked up and down the beach. It was wonderful. It was our first time out as a family with some actual physical activity done by me in probably over a year.
Sunday went to my Mom's. My family noticed how much more I was moving around, how happier I seem, and how much more energy I have.
I get to eat pureed foods on Tuesday. So very excited about that.
I hope everyone has a great week. My goal for this week is to prepare dinner for my family. Not something I've done in the past for a VERY VERY long time.
I am so grateful and thankful to have had this surgery. It is a miracle tool and has already changed my life. Oh and I've lost 25 pounds as of today. Woohoo!!!!!
One Week Post Op-Update on August 7, 2007 9:11 am
AND IT HAS BEEN GREAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm in awe. I can't believe this miracle tool. It has been such a blessing so far. Maybe I am still on the high from the morphine , but I am just so happy.
I have had WOW moments already. I am so excited and so happy. I actually look forward to getting on the scale. When it starts to stall I'll stay away, but for right now, I get up and after the bathroom, I get on that scale.
I also have not had any problems with my intake. I'm tolerating everything well so far. My biggest problem has been to continue to work on taking smaller sips when I drink, but I am just so happy and feel so good. I can't believe it. I have not once even regretted having this surgery (yet) or felt like "What did I do to myself." I am just soooooooooo happy. Did I say that yet???????????
Already the difference this surgery has had on my life:
1) The swelling in my legs and feet is completely gone in one leg and 90% gone in the other.
2) My fasting sugar score this morning was 87 without my diabetes meds last night.
3) I, myself, personally have been able to eliminate four medicines.
4) I'm already sleeping better. I wake up once to go to the bathroom, instead of every two hours.
5) No heartburn.
6) I've gotten out of the house everyday for a walk and talked to neighbors.
7) I have more confidence now because even though I am still big, I know that I am now truly changing and the fat me will go away and the true me is emerging.
8) I've lost 13 pounds.
9) No more nausea. I used to be nauseated everyday because of the diabetes and hunger.
10) Surgical pain gone. Went away today. I can bend and lean forward now.
11) I just feel good. I haven't felt this good be it emotional or physical in almost 3.5 years. I am really beginning a new life and it feels so wonderful.
Thank you my OH family because I have learned so much from you, received so much support from you, and have made some incredible friends. I love OH.
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I'm Home! on August 3, 2007 4:36 pm
Hi all, first of all I have to thank my angels Jean and Becky for posting updates on me, calling me, and coming to see me. The support has been wonderful. I also want to thank all the OHers for your support, prayers, and posts. All this support has been overwhelming and meant so much to me. And thank you to Willa and Laura H for coming to see me.
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I came home yesterday Aug 2 around 1pm. I had a relatively uneventful time at the hospital. I was able to let the anesthesiologist know ahead of time my sensitivity to nausea and with all the medications they gave me, I was not nauseas one time. It was great. I sure miss that morphine pump because I hurt. It hurts more than a C-section and I've had two of those. The area where they operated on just really aches on the insides. The pain med kind of helps, but boy I really liked that pump.
You know I was a little scared when I had to go into the OR prep and couldn't be with my husband. Then they brought everyone in. I talked with Jean, my mom and my hubby, then I got to spend some time with hubby alone. It was really nice. The anesthesiologist gave me something to relax me before I went to OR. I think Craig left and I fell asleep and I don't remember a thing. I was out so out of it that I did not remember going into the OR or being moved onto the OR table, nothing. I was out. I'm so thankful for falling asleep and not remembering anything. The only thing I had to feel was the IV and that wasn't so bad.
I walked everyday three times a day and am continuing to do so while at home. Just a few houses down and back, but nevertheless, I'm walking.
My kids have been really good about not running into my belly. They have been so careful and they prayed for God's healing of my tummy. They are so cute.
I have actually felt a little hungry and I can feel when my pouch gets full. I can tell when I took too big of a drink. I haven't craved any foods. Just some broth. But so far I think I'm doing pretty good. I have burped a lot and that hurts, just because of my whole abdomen being sore. Today is my first day I have tooted. I just can't wait 'til the surgical site does not hurt any more. I do feel me getting stronger every day.
Again, I am so thankful to all of you. Your words are so encouraging and uplifting and I just can't thank all of you enough.
My Story The following is my story in three parts so please scroll down to what may interest you. I hope that what you read may help you in some way or just be plain interesting.
1) Weight gain and depression
2) Weight loss progress
3) WLS journey
*******************WEIGHT GAIN AND DEPRESSION****************
My story, where do I begin? Growing up I had always had a slight weight problem. I think I had more of an insecurity problem as I always thought I was bigger than I really was. I can remember being so shy and timid as early as elementary school. Looking back in high school, I was a size 9-10 weighing 150 pounds. Again, shy, timid, and certainly did not date. My mental view of myself was much worse than the physical self.
Throughout the years from 1982 to 2000 I gradually gained 30 - 40 pounds here and there during stressful times in my life. I am a stress and emotional eater. I went up to 167, 198, 208, to 240 after having my two children in 2003 and 2005.
At this point, 2004 suffered with post-partum depression. I would cry every time my DH would call. In the morning when he left for work I would cry begging him not to leave me. All I could do was take care of my baby and nothing else. I finally talked to my OB/GYN and was put on antidepressants in April 2004. Well, to my surprise (kind of), June 2004, I became pregnant again so I went of my antidepressants. I also was turning 40 in July.
So here I am pregnant, depressed, overweight, and turning 40. I was a bit overwhelmed with the circumstances in my life even though, thank God, my surrounding circumstances were good... loving husband, rent our house, but live in a house none-the-less, and a beautiful baby with another on the way. With me being 40, it wasn't like I was going to wait 2 or 3 years. I wanted to lose weight, and try for baby 2 at age 41. So it wasn't like we were disappointed.
That dreaded depression just took over. I didn't understand it. I was ashamed of it. I isolated myself. I wouldn't go anywhere or wouldn't see anyone. I felt like such a failure thinking why can't I do anything. Literally, I was stuck. It was like someone was holding me down and would not allow me to get up and I also did not have the fight to try to get up. This occurred day in and day out. It was hard to shower, do anything for my family like cook, clean the house. My existence was miserable, yet with the most blessed of circumstances.
My beautiful girl was born Feb 2005 and I resumed antidepressants. I was not on an appropriate dosage. The depression was not as bad as when not an any antidepressants, but it was still there. I didn't cry as much, but I was still stuck. No energy, tired all the time, feeling guilty for not being the mother I wanted to be because I would not go out of the house. I wasn't the wife I wanted to be. I felt like such a failure and still could not make myself do anything about it. I WAS STUCK. As a result of the depression, I continued to gain weight up to 298 pounds and maintained that weight for all of 2006.
I finally started counseling in February of 2006, one year after my daughter. I had been miserable unnecessarily for so long. It took the counselor to convince me to see a psychiatrist to get my medication adjusted in June of 2006. So I was still miserable, but now was finally getting some help with my medication. The medication took time to stabilize me and even now with WLS, I had to change my medication because Effexor XR is not WLS friendly. So I still continue to work on getting my medication titrated to the right dosage as well as being on the right medication. It can sometimes take up to a year or even longer, but you can't give up.
Continued counseling with a new counselor July 2006 and finally learned to accept depression for what it is, chemical imbalance, and not continue to think that it was not my fault. I am finally not ashamed of my depression.
Now 2007, new year still depressed gained more weight up to 308. Then my father passed away in June 2007 and gained to the now all time high of 318.
to be continued
*****************************:: WEIGHT LOSS CHART ::**********************
||Loss This Period
Date of Surgery
One week post op
2 week po dr appt
One month post op
************WLS JOURNEY TO APPROVAL AND DATE**************
to be continued