I decided to post because I am finally feeling really different in my new me and wanted to share.

I am having a blast this summer shopping and just trying on new clothes in size 8 and medium tops.  I actually don't mind looking at myself in a mirror when I am in a bathing suit. I sometimes do it just becuase I never really took the time to look at myself in a mirror before.  I used to run past them and only check things out when I had to.  I was never comfortable in my own skin!  Now I do my own double take and walk back and look again and I actually get in those three way mirrors that let you see from so many angels and sides.  I look good!  I look DAMN GOOD!  It's is so incredible to me. 

I have never ever been this size in my entire life and I absolutely LOVE it!  I am thoroughly enjoying myself this summer.  I have a tan this year because I don't mind wearing a bathing suit on a public beach.  I am wearing some really cute and young looking clothes.  And, I have to admit, I am feeling incredibly more feminine or at least I am enjoying wearing more fashionable clothing and accessories.  I don't know if it's my age, my new look or what but I have found myself wearing more attractive clothing and jewelry than I ever had in the past.  I guess what I am saying is that for the first time in my life I really don't mind drawing attention to myself and the way I look.  Now that's an incredible jump forward.  Don't get me wrong, I would have to say that in the appearnce area, I was always a free spirit about what people thought.  You know, like who gives a crap, but now not only don't I care what people think, I find myself dressing for me rather than for someone else or blending in.  Again, it's a great feeling!  It's a real freedom and a  tremendous release from simply trying to blend in or hide.

I guess my point here is to say that not only am I successing at this weight loss surgery, but I am also successing at feeling very alive, attractive and comfortable in how I look.  I don't think I realized until now how much I did not like how I looked in the past.  Lastly and most importantly, I feel the healthiest I have ever felt in my life.  I eat right, I exercise, and I just love what all of this is doing for me.  It has certainly made turning 50 a lot easier to accept and an age and place in my life to be very proud of.  I worked hard to get here and I can't wait to see how the next 50 go!

So for all you pre-op folks and new post-ops, incredible things are waiting for you!  It's a great ride and I wouldn't have it any other way!

Jan

Forgive me if a little too boastful but hell, it truly is an awesome time and awareness in my life because of WLS.

I finally posted some new pics and realized I need to get newer ones still since I have a different hair do!  How vain have I become?  Oh well.  I will try and get some new pics for next week when I mark my 1 year.  I can't believe it is almost ayear.  What an incredible journey!  I am down 120 pounds and I feel so healthy.  

I love being able to shop anywhere and I love trying on clothes just to see that I can get into the sizes.  My head hasn't wrapped its self around the fact I am considered thin.  Actually many people have been very vocal about the fact I really shouldn't lose any more weight that I am too skinny!  I just can't handle that description 'too skinny' at all.  Okay I have lost weight and am close to a normal weight but too skinny!  Get real! I still have a butt, thighs and bellies (lower and upper) that hang out.  I have been within this 4 to 6 pounds weight since December so I firmly believe I am where I am supposed to be and am maintaining nicely.  I feel great and I know I am getting in my proteins, fliuds and vitamins so what more could I ask for?  Life is Good ~~~
Jan

February 23rd marked my 9 months out from surgery.  I visited Dr. Pupkova on the 19th of February and weighed in at 156, down 88 pounds since surgery, 106 since consult and 112 from my highest weight in March '07.  

I have been up and down the scale between 157 and 155 pounds for more than a month now and am actually very fine with that.  My goal was 150 and I was seriously considering 145 pounds in order to be in the so-called 'normal' range but have now re-thought tht goal.  I have the extra skin thing on my belly, both lower and upper as well as a ton of extra on my theighs, otherwise I would say I feel somewhat 'boney' when I have my hands on my hips or other places.  I can actually feel my pelvic bone, my hip bones, and all my ribs show when I look in a mirror!  Anyway, at this point both me and my Doc feel there is no real need for me to try and lose more weight but to just maintain what I am doing.  

It feels surreal to be here, that is, to be at a weight that I am comfortable with and that from all appearances does not scream "FAT."  I have always been the fat one, the plump girl, the robust, full figured, round, and all of the other names used to described a person who is more than just overweight.  I have been this way since I was like 10 or 12!   Sure I roller coastered my weight and even lost a ton when I was in high school and several more times after that, but I never remember wearing 'regular' sizes except for that partial year in high school (junior year to senior year).  I lost weight from extreme high weights to just get within the acceptable 'fat' area wearing a womens size 18 or 16 at times.  I am now wearing a size 10 or 12 depending on the manufacturer.   I have several sweaters and tops that are size medium, medium ~ me?  Seriously, it is so weird.  My nieces wear mediums from the GAP, Banana Republic, and American Eagle and now so am I!!  I love having the choices.  I love feeling so healthy.  I love NOT standing out in the crowd!  I am average, yippee, average!

I feel my biggest struggle from this point on will be to keep my goal of health, good choices in what I eat, and sticking with exercise.  I have begun to taste things I have been missing like a cookie or a danish.  I feel very guilty when I eat something like that and thank goodness, I have simply had tastes or bites.  I am afraid that I will crave more and give in so I know I will need to tell myself to resist and then remind myself that I have not come all this way just to revert back to old unhealthy habits and desires.  

Having WLS was not an easy thing to do nor is it a quick fix to being overweight.  I know that the real hard part comes now that I have lost the weight and have been able to expand my food choices . . . maintaining (in my mind and heart) the desire and drive to succeed with this weight loss and continue to stay on goal wll be something I will need to do each and every day from here on out.  Support from others is key to success so I know I will need to continue to attend group meetings being honst with myself and others on how I am really doing, in my head as well as in reality of eating and exercise.

If anyone has questions or needs help, I am happy to share and offer any help Ican.

Yesterday was my 6 month mark and I had my follow up appointment with Dr. Pupkova at Barix in Langhorne.  Yes, I drove back to PA from NYC again this week making it the third time in 2 weeks (last week for the pre-op meetring, this week for the post-op meeting and then my follow-up).  Okay I am nuts!

Received a lot of comments worthy of WOW moments from the staff about how I look great.  Even Dr. P said so as well.  Of course when I mentioned the extra skin and flab around my waist, she immediately suggested more and stronger crunches be done in my exercise routine.  I'll start working harder on that are from now on.  

There were no surprises.  My Iron level was boarderline last time and it dropped lower this time (kind of expected that).  I wasn't able to handle the prescription iron supplement I was given last time and had to discontinue taking it.  Now I am going to use the Bariatric Advantage chewables.  They are not bad, seriously, they aren't!  Hopefully I can get my iron levels up for my 9 month follow up.

Okay here's the TADA  . . . according to their scales, I am down 72 pounds since surgery, 90 pounds since consult and down 96 pounds from my highest weight 2 weeks prior to my consult with Dr. Pupkova.  I am close to 70% loss of my total excess weight and that's at 6 month out!  Yippee!!

I can buy clothes off the rack now and have been enjoying Black Friday shopping for myself!  Actually I have been enjoying the trying on of clothes that are 'normal' sizes and they fit!  I need to watch out not to buy too many new things since I am still 22 pounds from my goal and may drop another size, but WOW it feels GREAT!

Jan

Haven't seen any weight loss in a couple of weeks or more so I looked at why that might be happening.  I realized I have been falling away from a solid schedule of eating healthy and right.  I stopped drinking my protein shakes in the morning and although I substituted a protein bullet (Profect 25 grams in 2.9 ounces), I stopped drinking those as well. 

Basically I have been getting up, having herbal tea, taking my meds, and going to work only to drink gree tea and eat a modest lunch.  My lunches have been cheese, small cracker size squares that fit on my Triscuits.  I would have about 6 of these.  Sometimes I would have some Dannon light and fit ,sugar and carb control yogurt like, only 5 grams of protein and a sugar free pudding.  I have been eating dinner, protein in meat, some veggies and some carbs. And, I would munch on Soy chips in between.  That was it.  I haven't been hungry but I also haven't had a lot of energy either.  I was contributing my lack of energy on the fact that I have been exercising and busy at work.  I can see now it really is because I haven't been getting in my protein nor eating well enough to sustain a good energy level.

Okay today starts back to basics.  I had a protein shake with 48 grams of protein as well as my soy milk.  For lunch I am having some left over chicken, white breast meat and some green salad.  I have some puddings for a snack as well as Soy chips.  Dinner is fish with veggies.  I have had my vitamins and I will take my calcium and iron later with meals.  

If I don't start seeing the scale move again, I might try that 5 day pouch test that was posted on the PA boards a couple of weeks ago.

No more slacking off the program!!

Okay it's been long enough.  I decided to play with my computer and photos and upload some new ones.  

Over the weekend I decided to celebrate my weight loss with the purchase of newer clothes.  I went on a bargain shopping spree where I purchased a coat (rain coat) for about $10.00, a couple of tops for $3.00 and a sweater for $10.00 ~ all at Old Navy from their clearance racks.  I also picked up new pants and I am now wearing size 14.  I can't believe it.  I haven't seen size 14 since I completed a killer diet when I was a junior in high school.  Speaking of junior, I have even purchased 2 pairs of junior size jeans!  I love it!  I fit into JUNIOR JEANS!  (okay, so they are at the end of the size spectrum, but hey, they are juniors!)

TTFN
Jan