- Name: GERALDINE B.
- Username: ACHOSENVESSEL
- Location: TRENTON, NJ, USA
- Member Since: 7/10/2003
- BMI: 33.5
- Post Op
- Surgery Type: RNY (05/28/08)
- Surgeon: Louis G Fares, II
I'm Not In Any Photos Yet.
Before & After
There are currently no before and after photos for this member.See these instructions
if you wish to submit your own Before & After photos.
A New Life, A New World on December 10, 2008 8:24 pm
Wow, it's been a journey for me since my last blog. . . A journey which has change my life like nothing I could have ever imagined. It's all like a dream to me; a dream that I could sleep through forever! However, with this happiness comes some sad moments, as well.
Be the first to leave a comment.
Prior to my surgery, I had the opportunity to get to know some people who have become really special in my life. I met them through my surgeons support group. I'll never forget while we were sharing amongst each other, one of my friends told me that as soon as the weight started coming off, I would experience a shift in my current friends. "Lana" told me that my real, true friends would truly come to surface during my transition. At that time, I thought to myself, "yeah right", not my friends. . . They're my girls, my homies; they got my back!!!
You know what, "Lana" was right! Boy, have I been getting played, for years. . . The ones that I thought would be in my corner forever, where the ones that dogged me the most. Wanna know a hard lesson I had to learn? I learned that sometimes folks befriend you to make themselves feel good about "themselves". I've learned that "I" was that token friend - the one that drew attention. . The one that everybody hide their flaws behind. . . They'd tell me, "Girl you look nice", "Girl, you not too big", "You al'right". . . But really, they were telling me "undercover", keep yo' big ass just as big as you are, so I can look good!
But, the weight started falling off and the more it fell, the more distant my so-called friends became. Why? I figured that one out too! They had to distance themselves from me, because now, I'm no longer the token friend. . They can no longer hide their flaws behind "me". . My weight loss has caused a "shift" in the attention. Now, I'm the smaller one and they can't hide behind me anymore. So, instead of being an encouragement to me, or instead of getting their weight, health and personal being in check, they chose to kick me to the curb. . . All of a sudden, I'm being treated like l've got a plague. No one wants to hang out anymore. We're busy, got things to do; "Girl, I don't have any money to go out!!" I come around and I got to get that "twice over, up and down look", or the "Ummmmmmmm, check you out!!" Or, the one I hate the most, "Look at you trying to get a man!" Why folks gotta be so ugly; why they gotta hate? If they only realize what we had to go through to loss all of thisweight, the sacrifices we made, the challenges we faced, they'd be more kind! (I guess)
To all of you guys out there who can relate or have experienced this truly devasting awakening to the truth, know that life goes on. We find out who are true friends are and we allow them to embrace us with all the love and encouragement they have to give. And get this, we make new friends, as well! I share this with you to let you know that although your normal circle of life may change, after weightloss, "you" don't have to change. . . Be yourself, Improve yourself, hold your head up and let the world know that you made a choice to change your life for the better. And anyone that can't share in your joy, tell them to kiss your "skinny" ass!!! lol lol lol "Smooches"
Why are we here????????????? on September 11, 2007 9:37 pm
Ever ask yourselves, "Why are we here"????? I've viewed soooo many profiles in my years with ObesityHelp.Com. With each view we all have the same goal and that is to finally lose weight. Some of us are here due to health complications, some are here to help motivate confidence in one's self. Some of us are even here to prove to someone or another that by losing weight, we can finally be excepted; even loved...... Personally, I'm here for "all of the above".
Why do we allow society and all of it's negitivity about large people, push us to a place of needing to be accepted in their world? Don't you hate it when you're looked at from an outward appearance and not recognized for the intelligent person you are? We are human, just like they are; we have feelings, just like they do! So again, "Why are we here"???
I'll tell you why; we're here for the support of each other. We're here to give each other the strength and courage that others fail to offer. We're here to say to one another, "I know your pain", "I know your hurt", "I know your disappointments", but most of all, "We know that "together", we got each other's backs and we're here to change ourselves for "ourselves".......
Do you agree????
| Leave a comment.
05/28/09: It's a year for me. . . To God Be The Glory for All He Has Done in My Life!!! One year later and 110 lbs gone. . . Life is just too sweet! It's been a brief struggle, however, no complaints, whatsoever! I'd do it again and again. . . I will be posting a before and after in a couple days; my transformation is totally awesome and truly unbelieveable!!! Hope all is well with eveyone in my circle of friends; be blessed and keep losing!!! lol
01/15/09: Hello O/H Family. . . Another month has come and gone with another late post. I'm sorry, but I've been crazy busy. Unfortunately though, I had to slow down; had to have foot surgery on the 9th which put a holt on things. . . I've hit a plateau; still waiting to push these last 4lbs to get to my 100 lbs mark. However, I'm losing inches like crazy. Everything is hanging off me again; seems like as soon as I buy something, it's too big. . . Couldn't wait to say these words, now, with the cost of things, I'm saying, ok, G, it's time to slow down. . . lol lol
I'm really proud of what I've accomplished; to God be the glory for all He has done!!! I hope all is well with each of you. . . I've posted pics from my jouney, check out the transformation. . . It's really unbelieveable. . "Thank you Jesus!!"
12/10/08: I know I'm wrong; but believe me when I tell you, a girl's been busy!!! Hope all is well with everyone in my OH Family! All is well with me, thank God! I have my moments, but, still I'm blessed. Ok, people, I'm five pounds shy of my 100 lb mark. . . Should be there within two weeks! I promised myself that I'd take new pics at that time. It's soooo weird; I look in the mirror and don't see "me" anymore. . . It's all new, a thinner more vibrant "me"! I'm telling you, the feeling is nothing like I could have ever imagined! To sit down and cross my legs without even thinking about it is truly phenomenal for me; I've always dreamed of crossing my legs and now, I'm doing it! Clothes, don't even mention clothes; I'm in a size 12 from a size 24 woman. Mentally, when I go shopping, I still find myself going to the plus size sections of the stores. The other day, I went into Lane Bryant and the sales lady asked if I was buying a christmas gift for someone. I said, no, I was looking for a pair of pants and the first thing out of the woman's mouth was, "I'm sorry, but we don't have anything here that fits you! Can you believe it, I had the nerve to feel sad!!! My life, all of my youth, teens and adult life, I've been associated with Lane Bryant. To finally accept the fact that my body has reduced to the point of never needing Lane Bryant again was like losing a friend. . . Can any of you guys relate? It didn't take me long to grieve. . .lol lol It's just now, I'm learning how to shop, really for the first time in my life. Color is now my friend; I can't wait for the Spring; pastels and more pastels for this sista!! Life is new and my eyes have opened to a world that's more beautiful than I've ever know!!! All I can say is, "Yaw'll pray for me!!!" lol lol
09/02/08: Hello Family, What's hanging. . . lol lol (Excess skin, huh??? lol)
Just me, being silly as usual. Hope all is well with each of you. As for me, I'm beyond happy and loving each day as it comes. I'm down a total of 75lbs as of the end of August. I don't go back to my doctor until Mid October, so I'll keep doing what I'm doing and try and be surprised when I go back to visit him. I've posted two new pics; so, this is what I'm looking like these days. I guess by the time I post my next set of pics, I probably have a full chopped head of hair. Still not getting in all my protein and I'm experiencing some hair thinning. But, God knows I'm trying to get it right. "Pray for me, yaw'll"; who would have ever thought that I'd "one-day" have to force myself to eat food!!! lol lol I had my very first experience with vomitting about two weeks ago. I tried to snack on a couple of my mom's pork rinds (those hard ones) and they got stuck in my pouch. . . Believe me, I won't make that mistake every again. . . After that experience, I don't have the desire to eat another pork rind again. Earlier into the aftermath of surgery, I also had bad nausea when I used artificial sweetners, ie: Equal, Splenda. . . However, I'm happy to say that my stomach has become more accepting to the Crystal Lite and other products. Other than that, I've been quite well. Back to the protein issues; do any of you have any ideals on how I can get those 64 + grams per day without feeling like I'm going to bust a staple at the end of every meal? A sista' would really appreciate any advise you can give me!! Ok, I'm out and I promise I'll post again, as soon as possible!!!
Luv u guys and be blessed!!!
06/23/08: Hello All!
To God be the glory for all He has done! I've made it and I'm blessed. . . First, I'm sorry for not posting, prior to my surgical date; however, life was a bit hectic prior to surgery. But, all is well. I had my surgery on 05/28/08 without any complications, whatsoever. With the exception of some really bad gas pains, I was fine. To be totally honest, I'm still trying to find actual "stomach" pain because I never had any! I've always said that I had a very high tolerance for pain, but, this is beyond real here!!! lol I was expecting this achy soreness, but nothing and I do mean nothing. . . God answers prays!!! Since my surgery, I'm down a total of 36 lbs; 51 overall including the pre-op weight loss. I'm happy, to say the least. . . I'm not quite sure what size I'm in now; still trying to wear old clothes until I can't wear them anymore. My largest dress size was a 24; today, I think I'm in a 18 with comfort. . . We'll see because I need to go shopping before I return to work!!! I promise to post my progress and update my photos as soon as possible. . . Be blessed!!!
05/08/08: Hey Family!!
I know it's been a while; I need a swift kick in the "you know what"!!! Anyway, all is well; I've just been crazy busy and trying to keep busy so I can keep my mind from zoning out over the next few weeks. Monday starts my "pre-surgery" prep; I guess most of you who have had surgery had this prep faze. . . Strictly water based veggies, protein shakes, no sugar/fat whatsoever. . . I'm ready, I'm nervous, I'm even still tossing and turning with questions. However, with all of this, I'm excited like no other. May 28th, 2008 is the start of my new beginning; am I ready, "Yes I am"! All of you who know how to get a real prayer through, please add me to your prayers. . . God's word tells us to "speak those things that be not, as though they were", so I'm holding the faith for a full and uncomplicated recovery, speedy healing and an evenly proportioned "100 lb" weight loss and limited "sagging". . .lol lol
I promise to check in before I go in. . . Until then, take care!
03/17/08: Hello to all my O/H family!!! Hope all is well with each of you. "What a happy day it is for me". . . I'm approved!!! Thank you, Jesus!!! My doctor personally called and gave me the news today. I have been on disability since 01/30/08 due to two surgeries and I'm scheduled to return to work on this Monday. . . So, I'll have to place some time back on the books before I proceed. My surgery date is tentatively scheduled for May 29th. . . So, it may be a little longer than expected, however, I'm approved and fully covered by my insured. . It's gonna happen; Thank you, Jesus, it's gonna happen!!!!
01/24/08: Happy New Year, to all my O/H Family!!! I know it's been a minute; but, I'm here now!!! Things are going well for me; I'm still on my journey with hopes of making it to the other side. I have a few health issues that's going to push things back a bit for me; however, hopefully, I'll be pre-certed on March 10 and then, here's hoping to having my surgery by the end of March!! We'll see. Anyway, wishing you all well and I'll post soon!
10/28/07: Hello Everyone!! It's been a week, so I need to update what's going on with me. Well, I had my sleep study. Unfortunately, the sleep apnea has worsened and I'm being forced to return to the use of the C-Pap machine. I hate those things with a passion. I have a mild case of claustrophobia and the thought of wearing anything across my face is really freaking me out! I'm told it's a temporary fix; hopefully, as I lose weight, the use could be liminated permanently. I sure hope so!!! I've got an endoscopy scheduled for November 6th and then a follow up with the pulmonary doctor for surgical clearance. After that, it's the psych eval.... I'm going to my first support group meeting this Tuesday and I'm really looking forward to it. I hope I get a lot of my questions/concerns answered! Anyway, hope all is well with you guys and I'll post again soon!
10/20/07: Had my follow up visit with my surgeon on Tuesday. Wow, I was surprised to learn that I'm down six pounds. No real changes, just gave up soda/juice and drank straight water and Crystal Lite.. With this next month, in addition to increased water, I'm limiting fried foods of any kind.. That's all they're asking me to do.. I'm feeling this, "baby-step" program... Let's see how well I do in the upcoming month.. I had my pulmonary eval on Monday. He's sending me for a sleep study to see if I have an increase in my pre-diagnosed sleep apnea. I hope there is no increase, whatsoever; I hated using that C-PAP machine and I hope I don't need to return to it.. We'll see.. Hope everyone is doing well!
10/10/07: Been away for awhile. Had a couple of urgent matters going on at home with my son, however, all is well. I following my surgeons guidelines for trying to discipline my body for pending surgery. He said that I'd need to take baby steps to progress to the end result. I promised him that during this time and up until my next office visit, I'd give up open calories. So, candy, soda and juices were removed from the diet. Overall, I done fairly well, having only one cup of soda and one cup of apple juice since 09/11/07. Everything else was water or Crystal Lite... I expected a weight loss, however, I doubt if there's anything drastic in this regard. I'm still feeling all swollen and bloated; as a matter of fact, this is my normal daily feeling... That's the first thing I want to feel when I finally lose this weight and that's the feeling of not being swollen and bloated... I think this is the most miserable feeling in the world!!!
09/18/07: Sitting here today, depressed, in pain and really feeling bad! My back is killing me today; I was walking around all day yesterday and again today in 2" heels. A measly 2 inches and my back is throbbing like crazy. My job requires "office professional" especially when I'm required to go on the road (I'm a Claims Manager so I'm on site visits and court appearances alot!) Yeah, you guessed it; not the job you'd want if you're 100lbs overweight! By the end of an average work day, my ankles look like an Elephant's - so swollen that I can press my finger against it and it leaves a deep inprint for hours! At times, I look deformed. I hate the heat; "SUMMER" isn't kind to me. The extra weight makes it almost unbearable. I despise sweating; personally, I think it makes a large person look even larger when they sweat......I've finally got up the nerve to share with my sister my plans for WLS. It took me a while to finally admit my plans to her; I really thought that she'd make me "guilt trip"! But she didn't; she sat and talked with me and gave me all the encouragement I could ever ask for! You see, my sister had WLS back in Dec, 00. At that time, I was so, so against her having the procedure; I believe I was more frightened for her health and safety and couldn't break all the negativity I had heard about the procedure. Anyway, I was there for her though; helped her when she couldn't help herself. My sister had some very critical complications right after the surgery; so drastic in fact, that we thought that we were going to loose her. I'll never forget the fear in her eyes that day; I was alone and felt helpless! I don't think I've ever prayed so hard in all my life that day. I remember my parents when they walked in the room and saw her lying there; my Dad's face went completely gray as I watched the blood fade from underneath his skin. I'm from a family of true Christians and we are true "faith" believers. Together, we circled around that bed and prayed to God like never before. I had never seen my parents cry before; they were both such strong people. However, through our prayers and God's grace and mercy, my sister pulled through. Today, she's strong, health and simply stated, "Gorgeous"! "GOD IS GOOD!" Today, it's my turn! I know I'll have the prayer and support of my family. I hope I'll be able to depend on my sister to help me through those first couple of days, as well. As I continue to plan for my upcoming journey, I'll walk without regret. I'll plan because I want to be healthy. I'll learn because my life as I now know it will change. As a matter of fact, I can already paint a mental picture of myself at the end of this journey, full of energy, active and full of life! "I am radiant!" Yes, without doubt, I know this is "my" right thing to do!!!
09/17/07: Oh well, I did it; every consult is scheduled. Blood work and ultrasound is this Wednesday and cardio, pulmonary and gastro consults are all within the next three weeks. Only things pending is the psych exam. Plan is to have that scheduled and done with prior to my November follow up visit with my surgeon. Everything else will be done by my October visit. This time around, everything seems to be moving in a flash... I remember with my prior journey, it took me over a year to get all of these consults/tests completed... Wow!!!
09/14/07: Today is not a good day for me. Not feeling the best, healthwise, and I really hate feeling like I do. Every joint that I have is throbbing, my back is so stiff I can barely move it and I can feel these horrible fibrods swelling up all like crazy. Just feel terrible.. Funny, this is becoming my everyday feeling; I sure hope things don't get any worse than this for me or I'm going to go crazy. Going to start getting all of my consults scheduled on Monday. I hate I've gotta do all of this stuff all over again; I've got a complete medical file with every consultation report that is required, however, because the reports are more than a year old, my doctor is making me do everything again. Oh well, that's life and I've gotta do what I've gotta do....
09/11/07: Wow, it's like I'm starting my journey all over again. I've been away for a couple of years and decided to come and view my old page. I had no ideal that the site has changed so much. In trying to make my profile current, I've somehow lost the history of my former page. Oh well, that was a part of my old life and today starts my "New Beginning".... It's been a hard decision, but I believe this is the right thing for me to do. I've learned a lot of things about the benefits of the procedure. I've also learned that a lot of folks think that this is an easy way out; but I can bet my check that the people that are making that assumption already weigh 100lbs and have never had the pleasure of being over-weight. I really don't care what anyone might think; I'm doing this for two reasons: myself and my 12 year old son who's headed down that lonely road of the obesed stereo-type! I don't want my baby to go through the pain that I had to suffer during my childhood years. Kids can be so cruel and believe me, you never forget the pain.
Like stated previously, my journey is starting all over again; I'm not new to the concept of how this works. However, in this new stage of my "New Beginning", I want to stay focused on the goal, which is to lose weight, by any means necessary. In this second go around, I will have my surgery; I will not allow the bureaucratic savages known as the "Insurance Industry" to block what is destined for my life. I'm ready to fight, this time, with everything I am.
My name is Gerri and I'm from Trenton, NJ. I've been overweight all of my child and adult life. I come from a family of overweight people; every single level of my generational tree on my maternal side was overweight. As far as I can research as well as the current generation, we're all big people. Not only am I fighting to end this obesed curse for myself, but I'm doing this for my youngest son how is extremely obesed for his age. I was born in a lineage of beautiful people; big but pretty girl has followed me as far as I can remember. Years of hearing, "You've got such a pretty face", (like my existence starts from my neck up) is almost sickening, when I think about it. Sometimes, people fail to think before they speak; words can hurt, bad!!!
Anyway, I'm here, with hopes of finally changing what others see. I realize, finally, that my weight has been a true henderance for me and it's time to make a permanent change. With prayer and preserverance, I'm determined that "this time" I'm going to be a winner.....