ObesityHelp

Well, today was my last weigh-in before Christmas and also my last weigh-in with the consultant I have right now.  It was tearful for me.  I didn't expect to get attached or connect with her but I did.  Everything happens for reason as I'm sure this is too.  I got this far and I'm going to do my best to keep going.

I lost 2.4 pounds this week which puts me at 40.4 pounds lost since August 23, 2007.  I will not be weighing in again until January 3rd, 2008.  2008!  You've got to be kidding me!  LOL  Anyway, I must make sure that I don't use this as a free pass to eat.  There was a little pang in my gut when I was on my way home this morning that said, "I'm free".  Woah!  I didn't expect that.  I admitted during my session that I'm a little scared about the holidays.  I'm more scared of how I will react and handle myself although I've vowed to not beat myself up over anything.  If I want to indulge in something I will do so and not feel guilty about it, but it will be a conscious decision to do that.  It won't be about binging or overindulging.

My challenges the next two weeks will be sticking to my vow and trying to make sure I get in a good amount of activity.  I definitely don't want to fall out of my routine.  As a matter of fact, my "last chance" workout yesterday was a biggie.  At the end of the day my pedometer was at 15,203.  That is a big number for me.

So Merry Christmas, Happy New Year and joyous holidays for those who might be celebrating something different!

Well, it will be there after Christmas anyway.

I lost another 1.4 pounds for a total of 38 pounds.  It would be nice to get to 40 pounds lost by Christmas but I will feel accomplished to maintain.  The season (the excuse, LOL) lasts a wee bit longer for me because my birthday is 2 weeks after Christmas.  Many years I would use this as an excuse but not this year!

My counselor that I see is leaving and I will have to try someone new.  I am not happy about it although I don't place blame.  I'm just concerned about keeping on track.  I do realize that it all comes down to me doing it.  It's just the mindgame that I am playing with myself.  I give her a lot of credit because I was very skeptical that I would be successful and end up going for weight loss surgery.  I vowed to not put too much stock in "support" and realize that I had to do it on my own. 

The other thing I notice is that others seem to drop drastically in size and I can't really figure out why I'm not.  I work out and the inches are literally flying off but I went to Lane Bryant Outlet the other day and couldn't fit into a 26 which makes absolutely no sense to me.  Size numbers really don't mean anything because they aren't consistent within one store never mind from store to store but I do get a little frustrated to not have that satisfaction yet.  My size 28 stretch jeans barely fit me when I started-they were TIGHT!  They are getting too big.  Today I went to the bathroom and didn't even realize that I pulled them down without unbuttoning or unzipping them, LOL.  They also drag on the floor or the ground now.  I don't know, maybe it's because I am shrinking consistently all over and not drastically in one place.  I've noticed more of a difference in shirts though.  I'm in to mostly 2x shirts now.  I really did this for health reasons so the appearance is secondary.

My family has asked me if I feel any different and it has been so gradual that I don't usually notice.  Once in a while I will think to myself that I couldn't do something before.  Then I play this defeating game that maybe I just wasn't pushing myself hard enough.  It's good that I'm aware of it but I know I still need to work on that a lot.  I do feel successful in that I'm addressing a lot of my issues as well as my overall physical health.

I still can't believe that I am doing it without weight loss surgery.  It really warms my heart to know I found the strength within myself to make the changes that I needed to before submitting to that type of intervention.  I really hope and pray that I will continue on this course and reach a healthy weight  for me without it.  Only time will tell.  It's one day at a time.  Sometimes it is one bite at a time.

Really I thought people would have noticed a difference but not really.  My family does but they see me every day and I ask weekly if I look different and sometimes they say something on their own but not a peep out of anyone else.  I guess sometimes it would be motivating to get positive feedback.  It surprises me knowing that I've lost nearly a yardstick just in my middle (from bust to hips-4 measurements).  Well, maybe in another 10 or 20 pounds it will happen.  It doesn't really matter, I suppose, since I'm doing this for myself.  That is probably why I've gotten as far as I have.

I weighed in today and was updating my info and thought I would include it here.  It sounds like a lot all together but it really was lost a little bit at a time :)

Beth 36, 5'8"
Pembroke Pines, FL
SW 323.2 (yikes!)8/23/07
CW 286.6 (total loss 36.6) 12/6/07
GW 200 (I will probably lose more but I've never been this low as an adult)

WK1      319.6        8/30        (loss 3.6)
WK2      315.4        9/6          (loss 4.2)
WK3      314.8        9/13        (loss 0.6)
WK4      312.0        9/20        -2.8 & 13.25" lost
WK5      308.6        9/27         (loss 3.4)
WK6      305.4        10/4         (loss 3.2)
WK7      302.6        10/11       (loss 2.8)
WK8      299.2        10/18      -3.4 & 22.25"
WK9      298.2        10/25       (loss 1)
WK10    too sick to go :(
WK11    293.0        11/8         (loss 5.2)
WK12    292.0        11/15       (loss 1)
WK13    Thanksgiving
WK14    290.6        11/29      -1.4 & 27.25"
WK15    286.6        12/6          (loss 4)

Losses
32.6 pounds since August 23, 2007
27.25 inches hips, abdomen, waist and chest

progress pics in photos too!

One pound less this week.  That was good b/c the last few weeks have been stressful and distracting and I was afraid that it might catch up to me.  This week I have gotten back on track.  My weigh in next week is Friday (day after Thanksgiving) and I'm shooting to stay the same and hope that the following week I can be in the 280s.
To be able to handle stressful situations and distractions without gaining weight ( and lose even ) is a big accomplishment for me.  I know that these are the things I really need to focus on because it is so important to maintain the weight loss.  Every time I've gained it has been because I did not stay on top of it.  I'll have to treat it like any other disease and monitor my weight regularly and take care of myself.

In 12 weeks (start Aug 23rd) I've lost 31.2 pounds.  6 months ago I really believed that I would not be able to lose 10 pounds without weight loss surgery so, in some ways, I'm astonished by my progress.  I'm not losing it as fast, but I'm using the skills I would have used after surgery anyway and the more I practice the better I will get at it.