this weekend, I went to New Orleans and mostly threw the diet out the window. I'm slightly afraid to step on the scale today, but I'm gonna get it over with. it was a ton of fun, except as i was putting my stuff in the cab to leave, the cab driver said, ''so you're expecting, right/'' i was floored. I was actually wearing one of my favorite dresses at the time, which has been knocked down significantly by that comment.[my last two avatars have been in that dress] i just stuttered, 'uhhhh no- i guess this dress just hangs a little weird.' yeah. that made me feel awkward more than anything- and now i'm like, belly fat- i hate you.

to be perfectly honest though, a strange small part of me wished it were true. it was somewhat overwhelming to realize that, because i didn't see it coming. but i wanted so badly to pretend that the guy I was with was my new husband, and we were packing up and moving to a new city where i would be unpacking the house and waiting for the baby's arrival and he would be starting a new job. we joked about it a lot, because the cab driver didn't shut up [and, i'm pretty sure, didn't believe me that i wasn't knocked up, but he didn't push it all the same] and of course never stopped to ask if we were just friends or we were lovers.

so, anyway, now it's back to routine time and i'm sad for that.