arg2689
My Curvy Journey
Jan 25, 2015
In previous blogs you can read about my health and fitness lifestyle before and after the surgery, husband and kids. This is to focus on WHY I started MyCurvyJourney. I am ALWAYS willing to answer questions you may have about anything and everything, literally. I won't hold anything back, (unless I feel it is extremely personal, but those are rare subjects haha)
What is the point of MyCurvyJourney?
To start, I was going WAY out of my comfort zone by sharing my story. I am a very open and honest person, but something this personal all over social media wasn't exactly my cup of tea. Until I realized I enjoy helping others and sharing myself is a great start to accepting myself. So when I first started I was just focusing on weight-loss, health and fitness and overcoming my battle with obesity. Then I realized that there are little to no blogs out there that include everything else that comes with the issue. Obesity is a choice, as it is controllable. I am responsible for gaining my weight. I am responsible for destroying my self esteem, confidence and self image. There is not one person that I can blame, even though I wish I could because blaming someone for my health mistakes would be easier than owning up to and admitting that I am responsible for my obesity.
I was SSSOOOO ready for a change, but weight-loss wasn't my only battle. I suffered from migraines, depression, anxiety, bi-polar and obesity. I brought it upon myself and I am ok with owning up to it. Medications were not helping, counseling was not helping, nothing seemed to be helping me, which is when I found the key ingredient, the common factor in it all. My weight. Not just the numbers or the size of my jeans, but EVERYTHING to do with it. I hated looking in the mirror. Not only did I destroy and hurt myself, I was also hurting my husband, my children and setting an extreme poor example of self image. I always asked my husband "how can you look at me?", "why do you love me?", "you deserve better", etc etc....I was pushing him away but didn't even stop long enough to care, because it was all about me. Not only did my husband have to listen to me moan and groan, but my own children did too.
In August, I decided to make the change. I had absolutely NO excuse to remain the way I was. I wanted to get better, I wanted to change, I wanted to be happy. So not only did I focus on weight-loss, I focused on healing my soul and brain. I had the tools to help me too, I had a treadmill and a ton of in home exercise equipment, a husband who was loving and willing to encourage me, two perfect kids I had to set a better example for and to top it off in 2009 I had a lap-band weight-loss surgery and all I had to do this time around was go get it adjusted and I would be well on my way. NO EXCUSES.
Never did I believe I would actually stick to this and keep going, although I have not lost a whole bunch of weight, I have lost some and I haven't gained any! I have found what triggers my anxiety, depression and migraines as well as finding ways to control them and help them. I have learned, and am still learning, how to communicate with my husband and those around me, ask for help and be open. I am doing my best to not be so OCD so I don't stress out over messes and little things that can wait to be cleaned up. Being patient has helped my migraines be minimal due to smaller amounts of stress. Bills are bills, we are always going to have them, they will get paid early, on time or late. No need to stress about them. We have set up a budget for finances and groceries (which helps stress level tremendously).
So all in all here is what I have accomplished in 182 days:
1. improved self esteem and confidence
2. how to control migraines, depression, anxiety, anger, emotions and stress
3. closure of my past (it was never horrible, but situations have scarred me, and I am ready to peel off the bandage and let the forces of nature take over and heal)
4. positivity
5. Energy
6. Mental and emotional healing
7. Controlled eating (although I splurge here and there, it's ok)
8. New recipes for myself and my family
9. Workout routines that work for me and my schedule
10. Not to be so OCD
11. How to communicate
12. Decided to pursue my dream of becoming a Registered Nurse
13. Launched and am enjoying my little photography business
14. Discovered things that make ME happy and gives me some ME time
15. Rebuilding friendships and making new ones
16. Laughing way more
17. Enjoying life one day at time, not living by an agenda (but use one to keep our tasks in line =))
18. How to help and encourage others who face the same battles as I do
19. SEEKING help and encouragement from those who I share similar battles with
20. Finding over all happiness in every aspect of life.
I also realized I would love to get more tattoos!
I am still discovering myself, I have a long ways to go. You can't change a few years of bad habits and mental self poisoning over night. I share pictures, posts, recipes and workout routines that are personal to me, I share personal pics from time to time, and as I grow more comfortable with sharing, I will post more progress pics. I am not on the road to perfection, I am on the road to self recovery and eternal happiness. My support system is overly amazing, I just have to stay focused, and take one day at a time. I know I have a long road ahead of me, but if I can accomplish this much in just 100 days, I can not wait to see what else I can conquer in the next 100+ days to come!!!
You can follow me on
Instagram: @mycurvyjourney
Google+ [email protected]
Facebook will be up and running soon but you can find my personal page on there under Ashleigh Gleeson or [email protected]
