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Name: carrie E.
Username: beatle
Location: Mt. Pearl, Canada
Member Since: 5/24/2011
BMI: 44.9
Hoping to have surgery

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My smaller days, I felt overweight then, now look at me :( Uploaded on 6/16/11 3:43 pm	Me on my scooter at the Windsor Casino...2010 Uploaded on 6/16/11 3:31 pm
Me and my husband John Uploaded on 6/11/11 12:42 pm

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carrie E. has 7 Friends

Tam180	TerrieNL	jdeon
jamiesbearns	jackie79	NewfieSunShine
TDR

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beatle's Blog
beatle's Blog

A sad ending, but a new begining.
posted on 9/21/11 7:55 am

I don't even know where to begin.
For the last 2 months I have been with my brother who is 42 and was terminal with cancer, he found out he had pancreatic cancer that spread to his liver July 2ND and died Aug 30Th, just 7 weeks later. I had the privilege to spend the whole time with him, I miss him so much, he was my best friend life just couldn't get anymore sadder for me right now. leaving my family in Ontario was hard, my mom still to this day cries all day, this to breaks my heart.
I came back last Friday to face a few medical challenges myself #1 my hip and #2 a scan to see if I have cancer. night sweets along with a mass sticking out my side near my kidney....so the battle begins. Not only have i been fighting this battle to get the WLS from Dr pace for the past 5 years now I have to face this. They say God doesn't give you more then you can handle but I'm not sure anymore....I'm not one to surcome to depression or suicide don't get me wrong, I could never be so unselfish to do that to my kids but a nice cozy hole somewhere would be awesome...lol....I will be having my hip surgery within the next 6 weeks due to a hole in my bone and a large amount of deterioration to my femur. My orthopedic surgeon had sent me to another ortho for a consult because my case is so complicated with my weight and the mess my bones are in...my new ortho was disappointed I have not yet even had my apt to see Dr Pace. I have stopped reading the forum because this only depresses me more when I see people getting apts when they have only just sent in referrals this year, I feel it's not fair to all the others who have been waiting for years....I know at least 10 woman who are waiting for WLS on his list with no medical problems and are lower BMI's and still no apts, they have been waiting for years like me and it's not fair....I feel very sad for them as well as myself.
I want a chance to live just as much as everyone else.

1 Response to "A sad ending, but a new begining."

Carrie, my deepest condolences on the loss of your brother.

Have you emailed Rayleen Murphy to see where your referral is in terms of getting into the clinic? She is so knowledgeable and very sympathetic - rayleen.murphy@easte rnhealth.ca

I don't think there is anyone here who has not struggled with depression at one time or another because of our health situations. Thankfully, that is one health issue that is relatively simple to get help for - I don't know if you have explored the option of medications, but I will admit to having been on Paxil for two years now and I credit it to helping me stabilize my depression to the point where I was able to tackle my obesity and take action.

But everyone is different, I would never assume about your situation, so please forgive me if I am being too forward.

You deserve every chance that any of us have. Please keep fighting for your RIGHT to be seen by Dr. Pace and to start your own journey back to health.
jdeon commented on 9/24/11 4:54 pm

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