ObesityHelp

Haven't posted in almost 3 months.  I think that is mainly because I've stopped coming to OH.  I was annoyed about the MeltingMama "scandal" for awhile, although now I just feel like everyone (on both sides!!) needs to chill out and stop causing so much drama.  Why the drama? I mean, jeez.

Another reason I haven't been around is because I don't feel like this is really the community for me.  As an unmarried woman who gags whenever she sees "DH", and has no intention of producing any "DD' or "DS"...well I am having a hard time being interested in this place.  It's not meant as a criticism of anyone in particular, but obviously we all have different interests and mine don't really seem to be represented here very well.

I am now down to 264 lbs, which means I'm officially in the Century Club although I don't know if I'll bother to ask for my card.  I have been dealing with a mother of a stall.  I hadn't lost anything for a good two weeks.  Also I frankly have become very lax with everything.  I am still taking my vitamins, drinking my 64oz of water most days, eating my prunes, drinking my protein shake with flaxseed...but when I am not doing those things I am pretending that I am normal again.  Coffee? Sure thing, but a non-SF mocha would be nicer...  Cookie? Well, don't mind if I do... 

I don't dump on moderate amounts of sugar or fat.  High concentrations of sugar make me sleepy and irritable, which is technically dumping, although not the GI type.  I have said from the get-go that I never wanted to be a food Nazi.  I want to go back to leading a normal-ish life someday, just with my weight reset to a better number and some physical barriers that will keep me from eating too much.  But I am now beginning to realize that it's not that simple.  With the coffee, in particular, I've reverted to my pre-op ways.  Yea, it's a small skim mocha instead of a huge full fat white mocha, but I still drink one every day if I can.  The coffee was the hardest thing to give up pre-op and I can see why.  Why is that my comfort food?  It might be because I can't eat others...although i think about them all of the time.  Lately it's been a peanut butter sandwich...heh.

I went to lunch with the Oakdale coffee group a few months ago and I felt that was really interesting, not just because they were cool people but also because...they drank soda, from straws!  They ate carbs!  I think that was my first realization that we all have to learn to live with the surgery in a way that makes sense for us as individuals.

Clothingwise I am still in 24s although they are loose now.  I think I could get into 22s except my belly is the slowest-shrinking part of me.  I have a pair of 26 pants I bought at walmart that have yet to fit (weird), I need to go check if they fit yet.

Oh yea, and with the prunes, and flaxseed, and higher carb intake...my GI tract is behaving again, yay.

372 Highest
365 Pre-op
339 Surgery
264 Today