ObesityHelp

8/05
Hi, I'm a 38 year old mom and wife from Ventura, CA. I am 3 months post op and I think it's about time I have a profile! I have recieved so much support from OH in the past few months, I'm SO glad I found it!
I am very tall, about 6'1, and have always been "the big girl". I'm the third of six in my family, and am really the only one with a weight problem. I'm also the only one with a height problem! Just the cards I was dealt, I guess. At the age of 3 my grandma took the skin off my fried chicken and made me drink diet soda, cuz I was the chubby one. I was 5'11 in the eighth grade and already shopping at Lane Bryant. I was never huge, just bigger than everyone else.
I went to private school all my life, and then married at 18. I went through a very traumatic situation at 22 (caught my husband with my best friend) and left town- never to return! I started my life over in Ventura- transfered my job, got a cool little beach apartment, and tried to put the peices back together. I lost 70 pounds on the "Box of wine and cup o noodles diet". Not a diet I reccomend, by the way. Anyway, I met my current husband 2 years later and we married and had a baby very quick. I gained and gained and have been gaining ever since. I guess I let life get away from me. I took care of my husband, took care of my son (who is 11 now), took care of my step daughter (she's 21 now- and has lived with us full time since she was 10) but I never even thought about taking care of ME! It is a really hard lesson to learn. I am putting myself first right now, and I have a tremendous amount of support from my family. I have never been selfish before. It's all about me!
My highest weight was 323. Surgery date weight was 314. I have my 3 month check up today, so I'll have an official number, but I think it's 255! I am so thankful to be on this journey- it's the best thing I could have ever done for me.

December 13- Ok, I am horrible about updating this thing! I am now 7 months out, and I feel great. I feel guilty sometimes, I really have not had one problem with this surgery. Am I one of the lucky ones? I am very thankful.
I am able to eat a large variety of foods, too much of a variety. Nothing really bothers me, so will power is very important. I can tolerate sugar, and I don't know if this is a good or bad thing. One thing I am learning is to taste things and leave them alone. This is a whole new concept to me! I've learned so much about myself over the last 7 months. I've learned that I deserve to do good things for myself, I've learned that I really held back a lot before. I really like getting dressed up for the first time in my life. I think about my outfits ahead of time. This was unheard of before! My family has been so supportive, I know I'm lucky. I weigh 224 now, and I feel great about it. I still feel like a fat person sometimes, but I am so proud that I made this decision, and that I am committed to making it work for me, long term. I already feel myself slipping up with holiday foods, etc., but you know what? I'm not that same person anymore. I am a new person, with new rules, and new goals, and I know I'm going to be just fine. That feel so empowering and great! I find the support at OH incredible, and I am really working hard at lending as much support to others that I can. Some day I'll meet some of these great people!

2/11/06
Time for an update! I am really starting to realize just how much work I have to do to get myself where I want to be in this journey. It's so much harder on the head than it is on the body! I am really going through a tough phase where I am sabotaging myself on a daily basis. I can have a great day and then eat a bunch of wheat thins before bed, or a handfull of m & ms here and there. Nothing really makes me sick (except for the occasional chinese food)- and sometimes I wish I was one of those who can't tolerate anything! I really think I may need to do some more internal work on myself to work through some of the food issues in my mind.

On a good note, I graduated from Boot Camp last week, and I for a month - every night, I did serious excersize for the first time in my life! I feel great after class, I amazed myself with my drive and willingness to better myself, and not taking the easy way out. I signed up for the next class, March 20, and I'm actually looking forward to it! What's up with that?

I'm on the road- just hitting some bumps, but I know where I'm going, and I am confident that I'll get there! I haven't lost any weight in the last month, and that is a bummer, but it's really going to be up to me from now on, so I can only blame myself