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Surgeon TestimonialKeary Robert WilliamsMy first impression of Dr. Williams was, to be perfectly honest, a bit of intimidation. I saw him speak at the seminar I attended but it was at a distance and I was much more focused on the material than the presenter. In person I realized that he looked like one of the models in the Men's Health I was reading in the waiting room and that is not the type of doctor I am used to. Being of the female persuasion, I was more than slightly flustered. All of that was quickly forgotten once I got to know him and his easy going nature. He makes you feel very comfortable and he speaks articulately and honestly. He has no problem giving you accurate detailed data which I, being an uber-nerd, definitely appreciate. I cannot speak highly enough of his office and staff. They are some of the most caring and kind people I have had the pleasure of knowing. Once I walked in those doors, I never doubted that I had made the right decision. This same warmth and kindness carried to the hospital and has been a part of my post-op care. I have a bariatric nurse available to me 24/7 and I also have a dietician, an exercise physiologist and an amazing office staff. They have all made my bariatric surgery experience amazing. Member Interests
- Arts - I love art in all its varied forms.
- Books & Literature - Book worm and proud of it!
- Cats - The love of my live (DH aside) is definitely my kitty boy!
- Movies - If you can't find me, I'm at the movies.
- Music - Music is less of an interest than it is a requirement of living for me.
- Hiking - For all the things I love doing inside, being outside is a huge part of my life.
- Philosophy - My favorite topic of conversation.
- Geeks & Nerds - I am an uber nerd and proud of it!
- Video Game Systems - I heart video games!
- WLS in your 20's - I would like to know other peeps my age making this life style change.
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If nature had intended our skeletons to be visible, it would have put them on the outside of our bodies.
Update :) on October 22, 2009 1:23 pm
I am the worst at keeping up with a blog. The last few months have been great, good and a little nutty. I have experienced the dreaded 'being stuck', been too loose and too tight. All in all I don't regret for one second the choice I have made. That first month and a half was utter hell but once you can start working out again and really start to see the progress, you know you're in a good place. The last few weeks have been stagnant for me. I'm in desperate need for a fill and when I called to get one at the first of the month I was told nothing was available until this coming Tuesday, nearly a whole month of being loose! Amazingly enough I have continued to lose but I contribute most of that to my exercise because I can consume way too much food right now. I came back on OH because I realized I needed some thinspiration and how could I take it from others without giving any back? So to anyone who may read this and be pre-op or a new post-op going through hell, know that it gets better. Anxiety becomes manageable, weight begins to come off and you will get to a happy post-op point. I know because I'm there now. I am very close to hitting my first major goal of 50 lbs!!!! So close I can taste it!!!! I still haven't hit the weighing less than the hubs goal because that crazy man has been losing with me! He is running and working out daily and dieting too. He has lost just as much weight as I have but he has reached his healthy place so any day now I will overtake him and continue becoming smaller than my spouse, I can't wait! 
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Post-Op Check Up on June 3, 2009 8:44 am
So yesterday was my two week check up and as of today, I am on Phase II, whoot! Lunch today is FF refried beans with taco sauce and a tiny bit of LF Ranch. I tasted the spoon this morning as I made it and man, it was quite possibly one of the most delicious things I have ever eaten and I don't even like beans, lol.
So as of the post-op appt I am 8 lbs down! Never to see those L.B.s again, goodbye! My doc says this is right on track with where I should be as a bandster and hives aside, I am doing great. I was given the clear to start exercising, just walking for now, and I was put on antibiotics to make sure the hives don't turn into anything else. I picked up some protein pudding packs and got very excited for my first fill. My doc's office uses an X-Ray when they do fills so as they do my fill I will be drinking water and he will only fill me until he can see the flow of liquid slow. I can't wait to watch that, it will be interesting. Only two weeks! My Doc said that is when my hunger will really begin to leave.
Other than that life post-op is good. I feel like my hell weeks are firmly behind me and I am starting to feel more and more back to me everyday. Tonight I will be making some egg salad, finally I will be cooking again. Seeing as how cooking is actually a past time for me and something I enjoy, not just a means to eat, phase II will be much better than phase I could ever want to be.
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I am post-op!! on May 29, 2009 1:48 pm
Tuesday May 19th
One of the most anxiety ridden days in my life. You know my lazy butt didn't pack for the hospital until 1:30am which was only nine hours before my surgery! Time was passing crazy slow and I knew I wasn't going to sleep so I give myself the excuse of having planned my procrastination. Had a final dinner at Red Robin's, a big fat giant ooey gooey cheeseburger with lots of fries. Then had a final dessert at the Olive Garden whose food I hate and desserts I want to marry! Said goodbye to all the yummies I love. Cuddled with my kitty and wished like crazy that I could guzzle a big giant bottle of merlot.
Wednesday May 20th
I did surprizingly well leading up to surgery. Not too much craziness on my part and I didn't mind the little pumping booties at all. No tears until I made it into the operating room and by then I was already quite dopey so they just rolled off as I was falling to sleep. Saying goodbye to DH was by far the most difficult part of the surgery as it is always is with any surgery. When I started coming to I swore that I was being tortured because it felt like, well like someone had just sliced open my belly and I didn't have any pain meds. Once I finally came to I realized it wasn't that bad once I was comfortable. Definitely painful but not as bad as it could have been. My nurses were amazing and the room was nice, big and airy and private. Even when we had three visiting toddlers, two cousins, two siblings, my Mom and Mamaw and DH in the room it wasn't bad and everyone had a seat. The day passed pretty quickly and it wasn't too bad. Getting up and walking for the first time was very uncomfortable. I made it down one hallway and back.
Thursday May 21st
I woke in the night incredibly uncomfortable and in dire need of more pain meds. My advice to anyone about to undergo surgery, take pain meds EVERY 4-6 HOURS! No exceptions. It's just not worth it to have to spend any amount of time uncomfortable. If you are worried about sleeping that night, set an alarm. I wish we had. Thank God my night nurse was amazing and she came in immediately with pain medication and stayed until I was more comfortable. When I woke up again in the morning, I felt so much better than I thought I would. I was able to get up and walk 5 hallways! I then showered, changed clothes and moved from the bed into a recliner which was oh so nice after nearly a day in a bed. The doctor came later that morning and checked me out and I was good to go. I had my swallow test, which wasn't bad at all and was on my way home. I was fine at home that day. I, of course, stayed on my pain meds without exception and kept sip, sip, sipping but I was able to walk around without too much help.
Friday May 22nd - Tuesday May 26th
Hunger has kicked in. I don't know if it was because I am a bandster and didn't have restriction yet or if it was because I am such a foodie or if it was just mental hunger or what. I missed cooking, recipes and mostly eating. I could hear my stomach growl at me and even though everyone was kind enough not to eat in front of me, I still had food on my brain. The gas was pretty wretched at this point too. I could feel it in my shoulders all the way down to my lower tummy and it was enough to drive a lady crazy. It was truly hell week. I didn't venture back out of the house until that Sunday night, four days post-op. I drove around for a little while and was finally beginning to feel more human. At times I felt like a monster version of myself. I was so hungry, cranky, uncomfortable and generally miserable that I truly wondered if I had made the right decision or just made a monumental mistake. But I stand by it, I made the right decision.
Wednesday May 27th
I went back to work today. I would have loved, loved, loved to take more time but I just didn't feel right asking for any more time away from work. I have to have three people in other states working as my back up and I just couldn't stand not handling my own markets leading up to close. (Finance lingo, lol, I know.) It wasn't as bad as it could have been. I was worried that I would get sick if I took my pain medicine so I just took a half dose in the morning. By mid-afternoon I was starting to feel achy in my tummy and I wanted to last the last few hours of the day so I took a full dose. Bad idea for me. I do not recommed to anyone that you take pain medicine and then sit at a computer. It is a formula for nauseated disaster. I ended up leaving early.
Thursday May 28th - Friday May 29th
I am ashamed to admit this, but I called my doctor and asked if I could be fast-tracked to diet phase II, processed proteins. I just felt so desperately hungry. Liquids just were not satisfying me and I wanted some substance. My doctor approved but he gave me a warning, if I did this, I would be halting my weight loss and I would not be building positive habits. So I didn't do it. Finally by Saturday morning, I was beginning to notice my hunger less and less.
Saturday May 30th
After I showered Saturday morning I noticed that my incisions were looking odd. The wounds themselves looked fine but all of my skin underneath the glue (no external stitches, just some derma-glue) was bright red, puffy and swollen. Later that afternoon, extreme itching set in. I called my after hours nurse to confirm and yes, my sensitive skin was having an allergic reaction to the glue. I spent several hours carefully peeling it off and monitoring my temperature. No infection but man did I have some hives going on. (As I type this it's Wed June 3rd and they still aren't gone, grr.) So I put on some Neosporin and benadryled it that night.
Sunday May 31st
My first post-op family outing. The DH's father's Bday complete with a BBQ and birthday cake. Luckily (sarcasm folks) I had my itchy hives to occupy me and keep my mind off the food. During lunch and dinner I excused myself into the family room and watched some TV. I hated to miss out on the discussion and funness at the table but I was not going to indulge in self torture by watching others eat yummy BBQ'd goodness. Luckily (no sarcasm here) the family was great and the moment eating was finished, food was put up and they joined me. All in all, not a bad day. I did much better than I thought I would and my hunger was finally leaving.
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*Roller Coaster* on May 18, 2009 7:29 am
I could not have imagined that I would be riding such an emotional roller coaster pre-surgery! I spent the whole weekend with crazy giant mood swings, anxiety and insomnia. An ugly combination that my poor hubs had to deal with. For the most part he handled it like a champ, probably better than I would. Even though I haven't been required to do a pre-op liquid diet I am doing one today and tomorrow. Something about having major abdominal surgery makes me want to keep everything clear and gunk free. I was on a mission this weekend to get the house sanitized and surgery ready but I only succeeded in doing the average amount of house work and getting all my linens cleaned. Last night I had my first round of doubts in several weeks. I worry so much about something going wrong with the surgery or being one of the bandsters who never finds restriction and only loses a very few pounds. If either of those things were to happen, complications or a lack of success, I can't even imagine where I'd be. I have invested so much of myself, my time, my money, my hopes and my family in all of this. It would such a huge let down. But I am trying to chase away those negative thoughts and remind myself that I am following doctor's orders to a T! If I manage to do that, I can make this program work. Last night, as I laid in bad battling with insomnia, I turned on the lights and stared at myself in the mirror. I looked at my body and felt guilty. I asked why I was putting my body through this, did I not love myself enough. And then I answered myself honestly. It's because I love myself that I'm doing this. I am doing something good for me and for my body. I am not desecrating the temple of Candi, I am repairing it so that it will stand prouder, stronger and even prettier. TWO MORE DAYS!!!!!  | Leave a comment.
*sigh* on May 14, 2009 5:38 pm
So I don't really have too much to say today. I have been having some the same roller coaster of emotions the last few days. I am at one moment so excited I can't stand it and the next so terrified I wish I had another six months to wait. I bought some more supplies last night at Wally World and stocked up on my vitamins. I can't wait to be out of the hospital and at home, post-op and finally finished with the waiting game. I am now completely surgery obsessed all day everyday. Not that I wasn't before, lol, but this is a new hard-core obsession I've been yet to experience. I find myself thinking up new questions everyday: will I be able to feel my band, will I be one of those who loses super slowly at first or will I get that big push of weight loss in the beginning, how long will I need my pain meds, how bad will the gas pain be, will I ever be able to get in all my protein and so on and so forth. Oh to be post-op! Only five more days!!
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My Story
I began my journey with obesity and weight problems in the second grade. I can remember vividly coming back to school after the summer break and having my best friend proceed to tell me we no longer be friends because I had gotten fat. This was the first of my many life experiences as a fat chick. Childhood continued and as many of you know and have lived yourselves, it was filled with teasing and anguish over being fat. I was a pretty sad kid because of that and went through a lot of depression.
My teen years were fraught with the same. I had secret boyfriends who liked me but wouldn't take me out in public because I was overweight and it was embarrassing. I was too scared to try out for the ensemble choir, which I had been working for since middle school, because I was afraid that none of the costumes would fit me. Instead I watched all my friends advance while I gave up on music altogether, what chance did a fat chick have anyway?
In reality, a lot of my weight gain came from actual medical issues (hypothyroidism, PCOS, endometriosis) and it wasn't solely the bad eating habits I developed over time. I couldn't accept this because that meant I couldn't hate myself anymore and I didn't know how else to be. Once I started college I decided to break the chain of hate. I was bound and determined to love myself, just as I was, no matter what. I didn't start doing any crazy diets (on the contrary, I gained the freshman 15 and then some) but I did force myself to be outgoing and I began to tell myself, even if I didn't believe it, that I was beautiful inside and out. Over time I finally began to accept who I was and love my body, fat and flawed, because it was a part of me.
Shortly after learning to love myself I met my husband and because I was able to love me, he was able to love me too. He accepted and accepts for who I am, weight and all. But before our wedding I became focused on losing weight for the first time in my life. I joined a gym, hired a personal trainer and crash dieted down to the thinnest I had been since before high school. On our honeymoon I, of course, fell off the diet wagon and abandoned exercise all together. But I realized something then, a seed was sprouted so to speak, I could be healthy. It was within my reach, medical problems and all.
So started the four long years I have battled the bulge with diet and exercise. Constantly gaining and losing and never truly reaching a healthy place. Weight loss surgery wasn't even an option for me because that would mean I didn't truly love myself. Loving myself meant I could never want to drastically change my body in such a way. What would happen to that girl who fell in love with herself flaws, fat and all? The girl that loved herself would never even think of attending a seminar, let alone actually having the procedure. All of that changed when my OBGYN told me that I was on my way to being a diabetic before 30 and to get pregnant I would have to go through extreme fertility measures unless I lost the weight. Self-love no longer meant accepting myself fat and all. It began to mean loving myself enough to change.
So that is where I am today. I took that first step and went to the seminar. I got discouraged at the cost of surgery and the thought of six months on yet another diet plan. But I persevered with the help of my loving husband, my surgery is now scheduled and the wait is almost over. Just two more weeks and I will have a tool that will finally take me to the place I've always wanted to be. A healthy and, as always, a beautiful me.
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