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Category: Health 1 Person in progress, 0 People achieved this |
Latest Surgery Support Comments
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Thursday is your
day! Just remember
you are on the
journey of a
lifetime. Try to
enjoy every minute.
It may sound weird
now, but know that
you are cared for
and prayed for here,
and all too soon
this will be but a
memory and you will
be an inspiration to
someone else. I am
waiting for you on
the losers' bench!
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8 months and some change..... on June 15, 2008 7:55 pm
Wow...I just cannot believe that it has been 8 months since surgery. So much has happened in my life. I have had some really rough roads. I went through a "why me?" stage and now I am in the "why not me?" stage. Because what if God put me through all these surgeries since my Bypass to help someone? I know He didn't do it for kicks and giggles. I feel like I have a great bond with my Bypass Surgeon. "Dr. P" as I call him. If it were not for him, I am not sure where I would be. He has had to do surgery on me several times since Bypass.
See, my Gastric Bypass surgery was flawless. My surgery went beautifully. It was my body that totally and utterly rejected what had happened. If I went on and on about what has happened, I could be here forever. But, I have just returned from a month long hospital tour if you will at a couple of different hospitals. They found out that I had Sphincter of Oddi. I still don't know what it is, but, it is not fun and horrible on a Gastric Bypass patient. I have just come out what seems to me the worst surgery and pain of my life. I am almost 2 weeks out. I am making small strides every day. The toll that these months has taken on me is great for me and for my husband and especially our children.
HOWEVER, it has made me a stronger and in some ways better person. My husband has stuck to me like glue and has done over and beyond what any human should have to do. He never complained and has carried me on his back and says he will do so until I can spread my own wings. I hope that is soon. I know it is. This is what I consider the end to anymore hospital stays. Unless it is voluntary to bring the twins (the boobies as if you didn't guess) up North. They have gone South for the Winder and forgot to come back up! ;) I have lost 90 lbs and am looking forward to enjoying that weight loss and getting my body back to a normal state. I can't wait to exercise again without pain.
I would still do it again. I couldn't go on like I was. But, do I recommend it to everyone I meet? No. Not because it hasn't worked on me. But, not everyone is ready for the road that Gastric Bypass might take you. And you are not going to know the road that is until you get on the bus. I let others make their own choices.
I will post some more pictures soon. It is hard for me to see that I have lost 90 lbs. I can't see it in me. I am told to take pictures. I struggle with what clothes size I am and I am not sure I recognize the girl in the mirror. I am having a little trouble with this whole body thing. I am sure I will get used to it.
I hope to keep in touch more!!
Caroline
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3 Months Post-op on January 26, 2008 8:41 pm
I know it has been forever since I have written. There are MANY reasons for that. Since surgery, I have been in the hospital 4 times, the ER three times and at least 2 visits a week to a doctor.
So, for me, this has NOT been a smooth transition. I will write more as it is late now and I am utterly exhausted. But, I had pancreatitis, then lots of dehydration. I have had some pretty severe pain. It has some to do with my intestines and my kidneys. I have been in really bad pain and unfortunately, no one wants to give me any kind of pain meds to help. The reason being is that all are afraid that they pain meds will hurt the liver. I know grown men who have suffered kidney stones and fall to their feet. But, I have been dealing with it on my own. My kidney doctor told me that I had an obstruction which they had not picked up on the CT scan.
It has been a very hard, dark road for me. I can't lie. But, I pray now that they know what they problems are, that they will be able to help me.
I am down 60 pounds now. I know I should be jumping from the roof top. But, having been so sick for so long....not so sure that I would take my old body back in a heart beat. I realize that this is going to be a long process.
My dear friend came in this weekend to help me get out of a rut and she did a total makeover on me. New hair, new clothes...got me out of the house. It was the best time. So, I have uploaded some resent pics.
I hope you are all are well. I will write more later as I know what is going on with my body.
Please take care and i will write more again soon!!
Caroline
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3 weeks post-op on November 1, 2007 7:30 am
Today is exactly 3 weeks post op. I have to say this has been a hard recovery. it is strange, not so much the food. But, the frustration of exhaustion, limitations and how long it takes to get back to normal. I knew all of this going into it. But, it is different when you are actually in it. I have 3 children under the age of 7 and they have done great with Mommy out of surgery. My husband has been doing triple over time. My family has all pitched in, and friends. I am very blessed.
What I am most frustrated with is that I want to get my energy back so that I can take things off of my husbands plate. I am starting to feel that this is too much for him all the work he has done. He has not complained once about anything. But, I feel so guilty. I feel bad that I am not able to be there for my children like I want to.
I went to my post op check up this week and my dr. said that I needed to set my expectations. He felt that maybe they are too high. I think that I am supposed to be leaping from tall buildings and losing lots of weight. But, it wasn't happening. I had lost 12 at my post op. I lost 9 pre-op. Others in my group were 30 lbs, 38 lbs, 20 lbs. So, it was discouraging to me. He said that I was completely within the normal range.
I also was very sick with the Boost while on liquid diet. I had to go back into the hospital two days out due to pancreatitis. Boy, was I frustrated and upset. I just got back to driving because I had been so weak and faint. We were afraid that i would pass out at the wheel. The doctor thought that when I was actually able to eat then I would do a lot better as well as taking me off of blood pressure medicine.
3 days later, I do feel better and now my weight is dropping. I over did it yesterday (halloween) and now I am paying for it today. The two steps forward, two steps back thing is difficult on me.
I know that I need to cut myself some slack. I am just having a rough go of it. But, I hear it is normal. whatever that is :)
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Days away now... on October 8, 2007 5:46 am
Oh my! The lists of "To-do" are about a mile long right about now!! I am trying to stay calm and not to panic. My surgery is this Thursday 10/11.
I will be on a liquid diet for the next few days as I have been on Atkins for a while.
I went to pre-op at Duke 2 weeks ago, and you go with a group. I was with 8 other people. All of them had their surgery last week. Most did really well. A woman that I met that I became friends with is in ICU though and it has really been eating me alive. I have not been able to talk to this other woman who is having a lot of nausea and vomiting and she has not left the hospital since last Thursday.
The friend that I met has Muscular Dystrophy and her system is just not handling this well at all. They went back in and saw that the actual surgery was done perfectly. It was the Dystrophy causing the pneumonia and a lot of other complications. She is coughing up blood and they have now put her in a medically induced coma. It breaks my heart so bad. She wanted this surgery so much and had such an amazing spirit!!! I pray for her all the time, as well as all of the other people in the group. I am so glad to have met some wonderful people
Of course, this all makes me scared to death to go into surgery. But, I have to put it in the hands of God or else I will go nuts.
I am off to check off this long list that I have.
Take Care!
Caroline
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Why I am choosing WLS... on August 26, 2007 8:43 pm
We all have a story as to why we we are overweight and how we have gone about losing it, gaining it back, losing it again. So, I will tell you a little about mine.
I was never considered an obese kid....In fact, as a kid...I was on the thin side. I was tall though. So, I was ridiculed all the time about being the "Jolly Green Giant". Then, 5th grade hit and I looked as if I was a 21 year old woman. Hips, breasts, butt...the works. One would think that would be great! It was the WORST thing for me, because I was teased relentlessly. I did not like that sort of attention. I would wear baggy clothes to hide who I was. I hated it.
I started having an unhealthy relationship with food right about that time. I used food as something that I could control. I was an athlete, so, if I had to play in a game, then I would "carb load" so that I would have more energy. In college, I played softball and was a cheerleader. So, I would hold back on food if I had to fit into that skirt. I was always the biggest girl whether it was sports, or my group of friends. It didn't matter.
I started going to Weight Watchers at around 16 and then the love affair (she says sarcastically) with dieting began ever since. I am now 38 with a great husband and 3 beautiful children (I am a little biased! :) I am 254 lbs, with a BMI of 39.
I put on 90 lbs. with my first child, and could never get the weight off. I was diagnosed with PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome) and Insulin Resistance. When, I was pregnant with our second child (4 years ago)...I had pre-eclampsia and the two of us were very lucky to have made it out alive. I am grateful every day that we made it through. After our second daughters birth....weight came on at an alarming rate. It did not matter what I ate. I was on every single diet known to man.
We decided to have a third child. We feared how the pregnancy would go considering everything that had happened to me. An emergency hysterectomy (because of all the cysts and then I had a tumor) took care of that...so, we knew that adoption was in our plans. We adopted our son last year from Russia. I have gained 60 lbs. since last year.
I now have high blood pressure, high cholesterol, insulin resistance, fibromyalgia, bone spurs, arthritis, GERD.....the list goes on. I thought that would never happen to me. I always ask myself...."How did I get here?"
I researched WLS for a long time and finally decided that I was strong enough in March '07 to begin the journey. I am told that I am considered a "lightweight". That is the craziest thing that I have ever heard. I guess it is because I am not at 40 bmi. I am not sure. I have always been called a big girl, so, to hear lightweight seems funny to me.
My husband is supportive of my surgery and a couple of friends. But, mostly everyone is shocked that I am having surgery. They think that I am not big enough to have it, and that I am crazy. It is disheartening hearing things like this.
But, I have to realize...they don't have the health problems that I do, they don't live in this body like I do either.
I want to live for a long time...and given my families history with diabetes, heart disease and cancer....I KNOW that this surgery is the best thing for me. There is so much more that I want out of life that this obesity is keeping me from doing.
I am glad to be on this board and can't wait to talk to you all!!
Caroline
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Archive
My Story Hi everyone! I am so happy to be here with such a great group of people. I am a 38 year young (refuse to use the word old even when I am 80 :), all in the mindset) of 3 children under the age of 7. I am married to my absolute best friend. He is the love of my life.
My journey to WLS is a long and tedious one as many of yours was. I will be honest and tell you that it took me a while to get to the place where I was ready for this step. I am not proud of this, but, I was a very judgmental person when it came to Weight Loss Surgery (WLS). I had a lot of prejudice about it and the people who did it. I always thought “that is the easy way out”, ” that is only for the weak”, “only for people who are 400-500 lbs and bedridden”
How did I change my mind? Well…I consider myself a strong person. If I want something, I go after it. I am an over achiever. I did well in school, sports, and in the corporate world. So, when I started gaining weight..I thought it would be a breeze too. If one could win an Oscar for most diets tried…hands down, i would have to buy a new house to put all my Oscars in. I was great at losing, but, it kept coming back as to mock me. I treated it like a competitor or something “Oh yea..you want to come back on my body…then, you are going to have to fight me”
I have lost the fight in a major way. I had 3 children, 5 major surgeries in the last couple of years and one of which was a hysterectomy. My nemesis (aka fat) came back to bite me with a vengeance. Not only did I screw up my metabolism with all the dieting, I had to deal with hormones and thyroid problems. I thought in my head that I can just use will power. I could “Will” it away. I could do anything if I set my mind too it. But, it was the one area in my life where I achieved no success. I felt like I had betrayed myself and failed. I am not good at accepting defeat.
Slowly, I started researching WLS. I am obsessive when it comes to researching something. I have to know everything about it, statistics, you name it…I have to be over the top at that too. I just couldn’t come to grips that I had to admit that I had failed. I stopped looking into it. Because I listened to other people, media about how I could do it on my own, how surgery is so bad for you, if I just dieted one more time and put a little “umpfh” behind it, then I would be just fine.
Then, I spent a lot of time talking with other people who had had surgery and that they had all felt the same way that I did. We aren’t a bunch of lazy people looking for an easy way out or a magic pill. In fact, the strength that it took to even attend my first seminar was huge. After much soul searching and “food therapy”. I realized that it was not about being weak that took me to Duke WLS. It was pure strength and humility to say “Hey, I need a hand up”. It is not the easy way out. We are the ones that have to deal with surgery, emotional changes, food changes, serious lifestyle changes, exercise, vitamins for the rest of our lives. Yea, for some people…that is what they do every day. But, there is a group of us that have busted our asses to fight the good fight.
WLS is just a tool to help me kick that fats butt. I am a fierce competitor and I will do whatever it takes to make this work. I don’t consider myself as a failure anymore. Sure, I didn’t always make the right choices. Maybe it has to do with my genetics. But, you can rest assured it wasn’t for lack of trying. I gave it my best and WLS is just going to be an extra ally to help me continue fighting. I am not going out of this world leaving my children behind because I couldn’t fight obesity by myself. I am grateful to have an ally to fight this with me.
This is just the beginning of the next battle. But, I can promise you that I will do everything to win it!
I am sorry for everyone that I made judgments about before who had WLS. I never knew what courage and strength that you had. I am sorry for not understanding your past, your hurts, your struggles. I never knew that you had tried so hard. Please forgive me.
Never pass judgment until you have walked a mile in that persons shoes. If you haven’t had those struggles…no one has a right to tell you that it is wrong.
I am so ready for this next stage of my life!!!
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