Cleopatra_Nik

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I often wonder about the person who first (and famously) said “that which does not kill me can only make me stronger.”  I mean, is that really true?  As a blessing or a curse (depending on the day), I have a scrutinizing mind and I have determined that this statement, in certain situations, can be very NOT true.  If I tried a hit of crack today and survived…it didn’t kill me but did it make me stronger?  No!  It probably damaged things irreparably that I may need to keep me alive later.

 

I say this to warn you: beware the fallacy of clichéd wisdom.  Another favorite of mine: no pain, no gain. I would agree to “no risk, no gain” but pain is usually an indicator of something bad.  This is an indicator that I think it’s a good idea, as a general rule, to listen to. 

 

This is all sounding very negative but I promise you inspiration is on its way.  I’ve witnessed people (myself included) hiding behind these cliché adages as a way of avoiding some larger problem in their life.  They profess that which does not kill them makes them stronger.  Perhaps, but taking a long and realistic look at your problems and facing the music will make you even stronger than simply living through it.  A person may plough through something that is causing them great stress and duress thinking “no pain, no gain.”  Ok, but if there is pain and you honestly asked yourself why, figured out a plan that is less painful and moved forward toward that same end goal, was the gain any less for you not having gone through pain to get it?

 

My point is this.  We often feel like we have to go through bad stuff to get better.  This is often very true in life but we also have to remember that we are worthy of the good stuff.  We are worthy of a good belly laugh.  We are worthy of receiving help.  We are worthy of being cared for instead of always doing the caring. 

 

This past week many, many things went wrong in my life and I reached out.  The thing that surprised me was that I had the nerve to feel shame for doing so.  Shame!  That means I’m so arrogant that I believe I was built to handle life’s challenges all by myself.  And you know what I said to myself at first? “That which does not kill me can only make me stronger.”  I was reminded of another, more adequate, adage that goes “we’re never given more than we can handle.”  Now this week I thought that adage was a load of crap.  I could barely handle everything that was thrown at me.  It wasn’t until I realized that humans are not built to deal with their struggles alone that I realized this is true.

So my inspiration to you is this.  Whatever your challenges, work your networks.  We often have far more help than we ever choose to access in our lives.  The help we seek does not have to be material.  It can be emotional, it can be time, it can be attention or affection.  If you need it, seek it out.  Because that which builds you up, that which fortifies you, that which nourishes and nurtures you, that can only make you stronger!

 

Have a great week.

I have seen something else under the sun: The race is not to the swift, or the battle to the strong, nor does food come to the wise, or wealth to the brilliant, or favor to the learned; but time and chance happen to them all. – Ecclesiastes 9:11

 

Now before anyone blasts me for getting all biblical on you, I’d like to say that this has been one of my favorite verses of the bible since before I was a practicing Christian.  It comes from the book of Ecclesiastes, which is a very lyrical book filled with good, everyday wisdom that is not as much infused with “God does this, God does that…” as much as it is “this is the way of the world.  This is how it is.”  It’s the same book housing the lines from which the Beatles borrowed to write the lyrics “to everything turn, turn, turn.  There is a season: turn, turn, turn.”

 

What I like about this verse in particular is the underlying message, which can be boiled down to this: stuff happens (some might substitute another word for stuff.  I do not J).  It’s a truth that’s hard for people to accept and I would argue especially hard for RNY patients to accept.  We have undergone this surgery that is supposed to make us lose weight very rapidly.  For some of us this happens almost effortlessly.  The pounds fall off and the new life begins and we skip forward into the future happily.  For the other 95% of us, this happens as a process, complete with fits and starts, stalls and successes. 

 

It’s so easy to get down on yourself when you are not losing as fast as you think you should.  You start to think, “what am I doing wrong?”  For some of us there may be something we could be doing to increase our weight loss.  For others, time and chance has happened to us.  Like the verse above says, “the race is not to the swift, or the battle to the strong…”  You could be the most diligent calorie counter, the most dedicated gym-go-er.  You can drink 100 oz. of water a day and have the perfect proportion of protein, fat and carbs and sometimes you are going to get on that scale and see the EXACT same weight you saw last week.  Stuff happens.

 

So for this week I’d like to challenge you to get good at “rolling with the punches.”  I’ve been told many times to enjoy the journey.  This is so true.  I’m so focused on getting to 150 lbs (my personal goal weight) that I don’t stop to enjoy myself as I am right now: stronger, leaner, curvy, and, if I may say so, DEAD SEXY!!!  Some weeks I lose, others I stall.  I am not a failure.  I’m a work in progress.  So are you.

Enjoy your week.

Hey Friends,

Still losing, still exercising.  Losses have slowed down quite a bit but I'm still striving.  I hope to take new pics soon.  I am going to post the dresses for my "summer dress give-a-way" soon too, so keep checking back.

Love my RNY!

XOXO,

Nikki