dscottfl
Week 3-4 Post Op
Mar 26, 2008
Week 3-4 was very rough and hard emotionally. I was VERY nauseaus and I felt like I wanted to vomit all the time. I had a really bad week and after having 2 great weeks this was a big shock to me. I had acidity that made me feel like my throat was constricted. I had waves of nausea that were so bad I started thinking "is this what its always going to be like?".
I was so hesitant to eat because of the nausea that I had a panic attack, my hands went clammy and I broke into a cold sweat and nearly passed out in front of 5 workmates because I thought I was going to be sick in front of them. (they did not know about the operation).
Every time I ate one morsel of food I wanted to throw it up and felt it sliding the whole way down.I have thought things like;
"what have I done to myself?"
"I have destroyed myself and can never change it back"
"I am going to be miserable for the rest of my life"
"I wish I could turn back time"
"Does eating ever get better or will I always feel like it is stuck in my throat"
"I wish I got the band instead (cos its reversable)"
All sorts of things. I have even made myself so sick thinking about all this stuff I have dry reached over it. I am not ashamed of any of this. Does this make me a mental case? No. Does it mean I did the wrong thing? No. Does this mean I should never have done this cos I wasn't ready? No. I was ready for the operation and the life change, I know that. Adjusting to it is a different thing.
It just means that I am human and everyone thinks and feels differently at different times through this process. Some people are better at this HUGE LIFE adjustment than others and some struggle a little bit. Do I love my sleeve? No, not yet and someday I hope I will. My good days are good days and hopefully one day they will outweigh the bad ones, each one is just a step at a time.
I was so hesitant to eat because of the nausea that I had a panic attack, my hands went clammy and I broke into a cold sweat and nearly passed out in front of 5 workmates because I thought I was going to be sick in front of them. (they did not know about the operation).
Every time I ate one morsel of food I wanted to throw it up and felt it sliding the whole way down.I have thought things like;
"what have I done to myself?"
"I have destroyed myself and can never change it back"
"I am going to be miserable for the rest of my life"
"I wish I could turn back time"
"Does eating ever get better or will I always feel like it is stuck in my throat"
"I wish I got the band instead (cos its reversable)"
All sorts of things. I have even made myself so sick thinking about all this stuff I have dry reached over it. I am not ashamed of any of this. Does this make me a mental case? No. Does it mean I did the wrong thing? No. Does this mean I should never have done this cos I wasn't ready? No. I was ready for the operation and the life change, I know that. Adjusting to it is a different thing.
It just means that I am human and everyone thinks and feels differently at different times through this process. Some people are better at this HUGE LIFE adjustment than others and some struggle a little bit. Do I love my sleeve? No, not yet and someday I hope I will. My good days are good days and hopefully one day they will outweigh the bad ones, each one is just a step at a time.
1 week post op
Mar 11, 2008
I am so glad the first week is over. The op wasn't really as bad as i thought. The pain is really not something to talk about, its more an uncomfortable feeling like indegestion in your sternum region. Do I feel like I am missing something? No. It just feels like I have had an operation and am on liquids for a while. My tummy doesn't feel weird or anything. I know that it is smaller because I get a full feeling quicker than normal, like my tummy has shrunk, that sort of feeling, nothing more. This is good because this is also how your head adjusts.
I did have a moment in the hospital where I thought wow, what have I done, I actually broke into a little sweat and got a bit panicy. This lasted all of about 30 secs and it was over. I just kept telling myself the doc shrank my tummy for me, nothing major.
I was in hospital 4 days. On pain meds for 2 days and then just liquid pain medication.
What has taken me back a little is how wiped out I feel. Its been 1 week today and I do not think I would like to go for a walk around the block yet. I am fine around the house but anything more just yet would be too much I feel - for me. Everyone is different. Although I did have a complication also. I had something called a plural effusion. Basically this is fluid around the lungs. 3 days after I got out of the hospital I started to feel short of breath ... a little scary for a moment or two because I was not sure what was going on. Nothing to worry about though because a few days later it was fine. It just sorted itself out.
Whats been great is how easy it is to drink and eat. I have been failry lucky I think. It was only the first two days that it was uncomfortable, not painful, just uncomfortable. I just focused on my liquids.
I did have a moment in the hospital where I thought wow, what have I done, I actually broke into a little sweat and got a bit panicy. This lasted all of about 30 secs and it was over. I just kept telling myself the doc shrank my tummy for me, nothing major.
I was in hospital 4 days. On pain meds for 2 days and then just liquid pain medication.
What has taken me back a little is how wiped out I feel. Its been 1 week today and I do not think I would like to go for a walk around the block yet. I am fine around the house but anything more just yet would be too much I feel - for me. Everyone is different. Although I did have a complication also. I had something called a plural effusion. Basically this is fluid around the lungs. 3 days after I got out of the hospital I started to feel short of breath ... a little scary for a moment or two because I was not sure what was going on. Nothing to worry about though because a few days later it was fine. It just sorted itself out.
Whats been great is how easy it is to drink and eat. I have been failry lucky I think. It was only the first two days that it was uncomfortable, not painful, just uncomfortable. I just focused on my liquids.
