It's been way too long since I posted anything here.  LIfe has been serioulsy crazy for me these past few months and I've been out of touch with everyone and everything important to me.

Let's see...where do I begin?  The results came in from the sleep study and just as I expected I have severe sleep apnea.  I picked up my CPAP machine last week.  I'm trying to get used to it but so far this thing is for the birds!!

The consult with Dr. Moazzez went well.  We talked about the lapband and RNY both.  We both agreed that the lapband just won't give me as much weight loss as I truly need.  The RNY is the best option for me.  His office has submitted info to my insurance company for "pre-certification." The first letter came back saying they didn't have enough info to approve.  Dr. Mo's office gave them additional info so now I'm playing the waiting game AGAIN!

I'm really anxious to get this show on the road!!

Last night, I finally did the sleep study my doctor has wanted done for over a year!  I’ve put it off because I honestly did NOT want to have to wear that #@$! CPAP.  I already know that I have sleep apnea.  I’ve been told by my family how badly I snore, stop breathing, etc.  And because my dad has it, the family recognizes the behavior.  But somehow I talked myself into vanity being more important than a restful night’s sleep.

Now as I learn more about WLS and comorbidities, I realize how serious sleep apnea is and how important the CPAP will be for surgery.  So I bit the bullet and finally went for the test.  I swear I don’t know how they will be able to diagnose a thing for me because I feel as if I never slept.  The office is on a busy highway that stayed busy all night long!  It didn’t help that I couldn’t get comfortable either.  Not really from the wires at all but more of how I was laying to keep the wires in place.  I typically sleep only my belly all night.  Last night I made the conscious effort with every little move to stay on my back or my sides.  With every little move I’d wake up and it seemed to take FOREVER to get comfortable and back to sleep again.  The worst part…the tech woke me up at 5:45 this morning.      The only time I get up that early is to catch a plane for vacation darn it!!

At least it is over with now.  I should have results back in 7-10 days.  And when I have my consult with Dr. Moazzez next month this will be one less test I will need to do if I decide on surgery.  

I made an appointment for a consultation with Dr. Moazzez!!!  I’m SO excited!

I think I've been putting it off because in some way I expected to have any and all questions I’d ever ask about WLS ready to take to the appointment.  (Just another nasty part of that “all or nothing” mentality I have)

But today I decided to just do it.  Granted, my appointment isn’t for another whole month but at least I made the move to schedule it.  That’s progress, right?

For years I've said that WLS is not for me.  Too many risks involved with surgery and too many changes a person is forced to make post-op.  The fact of the matter is I really didn't know a thing about WLS.  I heard the word "surgery" and said forget it!  

Something in me changed recently. I don't know if it is desperation or what, but I realized that I can't go on they way I am and that I don't know enough about WLS to say it's not for me.  

So I decided to do some research.  I attended a seminar at a local hospital given by the doctor who did a friends' RNY.  It was a very informative session and I LOVED the doctor.  

I'm still not decided for sure that WLS is for me.  But at this point have not decided that it isn't either.  I'm doing research.  I'm asking questions.  And I'm talking to people who've been through it.  At least I will be able to say that I made an informed decision -- not one based on the fact that I'm just too afraid of it all.