ObesityHelp

today is august 18 th already. wow, where did the summer go? i have beeen sick for most of it. last week 2 x i went to emergency at van wert co. hospital. first time the dr. just gave me stuff for nausea, and sent me home. she wouldn't even listen to me that i had called the barix and they told me i needed fluids. so, on fri. i had to call barix again, they told me to go. on wed. when the dr. didn't do anything dr. vig and michelle were concerned. he called and was so mad. i didn't even catch his name! he was fuming. so, i even called dr. jarvis's office. i was crying, cause i was so dizzy and sick.
now, here it is fri. again. wed. i went back to dr. and carrie admitted me on the 4th floor. yuck, is that place bad. 2nd floor is all nice and new and clean. i felt like i was in a closet. barb grogg is head of the house and she came and checked on me. i thought that was nice. i love her. i had to drink 2 bottles of barium and have a cat scan. it showed nothing i guess.so, they retested me for h. pylori and i don't know the results of that. dr. jarvis sent dr.niektly in. he's a gastro man, but he acted not interested. and as though he knows nothing of g.b. s. the hospital was pathetic. they kept sending me food and drinks with sugar(even though the nurse and i specified not). they put me on clesr liquids. that dr. even stated that i needed something more substantial to stop the burning in my stomach. then said oh well.i am seriously wondering about my skills to speak.nobody seems to listen or care!!!i had round the clock iv's.jarvis came in morning and said i could go home, but get with carrie to see waht i should do, next. that should be a doozie!!!
i've tried really hard today to drink, but still nauseates me so bad. my food and drinks feel like they are stuck now too.i just want to enjoy the rest of summer. we want to go to the lake and rent a boat.please, GOD let me get well. i am doing all they say. at least my neck and head are some better, but i know there is something in our room that makes me plug up.i still am not losing. i'm at 170. it's getting depressing.all the newbies are always whining that they've only lost 100 lbs. in 2 months. man, i'm not even gonna get that. i just want to make my goal.i have 35 more to go.it's sad. i went through all that and if i fail, it's gonna eat me up. i want this bad. to show i can, and i do what i'm supposed to ----- that's the shitter.till next we meet.

hi all, well, it sure has been a scorcher this summer. it kinda got away from me. it is now aug.1st. we've been couped up for a week in house. i have been having such bad acid in stomach. i can't eat.i think it was the wellbutrin300 mgs. all at once. when i was taking 150 2 x a day i was alright.so, i switched back to zoloft, 50 mgs. but, pharmacy is making me break them into.it is hurting so bad now that i'm gonna stop all antideppressants.i can't drink. this is really bad. in 4 days i have had 6-7 drinks.(bottles of water). with this heat i have to be dehydrated. i feel weak, sweaty and my head is throbbing, not to mention the whole in my stomach.no one cares. dawn sobers has had some tips for me and i'm trying it today. i feel a little better in my stomach i ate lunch, but that's all so far. i had my protein and 1/2 bottle of water. i have to get drinking. how?i want to go swimming so bad. there is no where to go. i hate not having a pool. i love our hot tub, but not in this heat.the neighbors are out swimming in a small blowup probably 2 ft. deep i would even love that now!!george said we are going to the lake, but i think it's too hot to go there even. so far of a drive.i'm gonna go try to have something to drink. take gabb out on deck under the gazebo and read. it will probably last 10 min. if that.

wow,sure has been along time since i have posted.it is july 24 -06. we moved a month ago from cridersville to convoy, ohio. that way i could be closer to mom, she has parkinson's. i love our new house. it is so much smaller and kinda on a private street. i can see my son way more. but, there's one thing, maybe two i miss my job at the super wash. gary my boss, he was my rock at times. and the worst i miss the llamas. especially yogi, and beanie. they were my best friends the whole 2 yrs. i lived there.i miss all 7 of them, but those two really interacted with me. i just can't get over the sadness, i'm really depressed. i can't talk about them, look at their pictures, anything. i love them and it's like they've died. i can go see them anytime, but it's 45 min. away and that would be so sad for me to leave them.enogh, i'm crying now.sometimes depression is overwhelming me. why? i have the most wonderful man in the world, i'm losing weight, nice house everything is going well.comes with the surgery.i am losing so slow. it really upsets me at times. i know we all lose at our own pace, yet everday i hear i'm 3 months out and lost 75-100 lbs. it eats at you sometimes. i have only lost around 60 lbs. but, i go down and up in a range of 4 lbs. it stays like this for 1 month or more. i am gonna get there i guess just slower than most.
oh my god, today big g and i went to decatur just to see what was there and ended up trading in the caddy for a brand spanking new ford 500. it's so pretty, a metallic green. very light, like silver at times. wow, that has never happened in my life before!!see, i told you he's wonderful. tomorrow i go to dr. with mom, hope i can hold back the tears till we get home. and wed. i go to eye dr, finally. since surgery i can't see. i didn't even know my own son, in the newspaper. it has really hurt his feelings. i felt bad, but i swear it's my eyesight.i don't think he believes me.
and for a final thing today, i want to acknowledge my beautiful webpage!!! it is the master piece of the talented and beautiful apple pie. she did a bang up job. i love, love, love it!! thanks again ,apple.i will try and post more, i've got to figure out a way to lose fast

today is April 16 th 2006. a little sad as 1 yr. ago my fav. aunt died. today is easter. many mixed emotions going on now. first birthday without a cake in 50 yrs. i know that is probably stupid, but that's how emotionally attached to food that i am. then we found out my mom has parkinson's disease. that really rocked my world. she is my best friend in life. always there for me. so, i feel that i need to be closer to her. to help. it's in early stages the dr. said. i have my doubts.,but he's the expert. so, loving man that he is, my boyfriend agreed to put off moving down south for 3 yrs. and if things are the same we will move there for 6 months of the year. but, for now we ware going to move to a town closer to my family. my mom, dad and son. only 8 miles away instead of 50. my bf is great and i'm so blessed to have him.but, he is a big procrastinator. he told me to start looking. we went on sat. to look at houses. we found this one and feel in love. small town, close, but not too close to family. all on one floor which is big. we both have horrible knees. especially him since football and basketball years in air force and high school.on sun. we put in a bid and by tues. we are in. so, in 1 month she has to be out and we will start moving. that is all huge!!!! but, and this is big in a good way-- today i went with him to grocery and i wanted to get some stuff for his son and him in the way of clothes. i needed some shorts. man they were all really short. but i found a longer pair. i can wear a size 16!!! i am all the time mad because i don't cheat, but no weight loss for wks. at a time. i started out wearing a 24. so, i found a pair of jeans and a tank top, with a shrug, hate my arms. but, a 16!!!! anx-large top. yippie. i was so happy the dressing room lady said boy your happy. you must love easter. i told her why. she was happy for me. it's been a great day. yesterday i called the barix and my stomach hsa been burning like with gerd, but i also feel lightheaded or dizzy at times. the nurse told me to call my family dr. i told her he was gone for the day and i need help. she said to call him and go to specialist get a scope. she never let me talk to dr. that has always been protocal there. then i was trying to make my 6 month appt. and lady at desk said you don't need to come in just send bloodwork. he'll call if any problems. what the heck. my surgeon left, and turned me over to dr. vigliano. he doesn't know me. i feel abandoned by them. that is whay i chose the barix because i was assured they would be there for me always.i may try and call wanda dr. stelmacks nurse. she is there until june she said.i really don't like that head nurse. she has always been contrery with me. well, that's all for now. i gotta have a drink of protein.see ya lte

it has been awhile since i have written. i am 4 months out now. still so slow. my knee is still in so much pain, but went to a waterpark for my birthday weekend and that was an eye opener---oohh oohh weee!!!!!!!!!!! my boyfriend set all this up for my 50th. and i haven't seen myself full length. too much flabbiness. gross. needs to be tightened up badly. i am down 41 lbs. that’s it. my sister in law went down 20 just having a bladder surgery. i don't know why this is going this slow. i changed vitamins and have more energy at least. people are telling me i look skinny. yeah--in clothes maybe. but, it's time to get serious, no excuses of my knee. cause if i don't then i will look like a granny with old lady skin everywhere. so far my hair is starting to come out now. but, i'm hoping it is just gonna be a short lived thing. i'm alive and not throwing up and having a lot of problems like some do. i'm grateful, just venting out loud. my new life is coming along. and no longer when i walk in a room do people look away. it is a little scary though getting compliments. just not used to it at all.