Tonight I found out my daughter was name the UGA most outstanding Senior in Childhood Education for 2010-2011. She has work hard and long and finally has a reward and scholarship for this work and endurance.
        I am feeling better and getting to make more real friends and exploring the Life I want. Like this experience for her; I have achieved an award for excellence as well- My Life, Health and more Happiness. Joy in seeing all the accomplishments hers and mine equal a special LIFE because I am living Out Loud and Enjoying Life again!! Thank You Dr. Richards and the Team at GMC

     LIFE is so full of everyday and long term problems. Be it the family God gave you or you created on your own they are there ( even when you don't want them) or the people in your universe. We all have our own universe and collide daily with others, good and bad. Whether you have had surgery or plan to or know someone who has had it ... LIFE is still the changing entity we cannot outrun. LIFE is not made perfect by the surgery and can actually create some problems we never though of before the surgery. I overheard at a meeting how someone thought the surgery would change her life and make things perfect once she lost all the weight. WRONG is what crossed my mind next as I think of all the family issues and people around bumping into my universe that affect me daily. I will have diabetes as my pancreas is what it is but I am under control and the Blood pressure varies without medication but a teenage daughter can elevate it if I allow stress to prevail. So many people need to know this is a surgery that provides a tool and not a" Magical Cure" to make life go away. Please realize we must address our issues without food anymore so counseling , reading and encouragement with LIFE changes and our reactions to really cut out the problems of our LIFE.

      Yes,  I am the COW and it is not a derogatory name for myself at all just so you know!. I have realized that as much as  I hated being compared to an animal in the past ,we can learn a lot from the COW- chew, chew ,chew and then chew some more ( sound familiar?) or you will throw up if it is not chewed enough. Another similarity to the beloved COW is the digestive upset that occurs, if not eating the correct food. It rumbles and tumbles and has a foul smell if you do not behave!! Got any guesses as to this similarity? you got it GAS , Hence the market for Gas-X!! I also have loose skin ,same as the Cow , just not so leathery .
      I have decided to embrace the COW and stand up to correct the Gas issue, but continue with eating right and drinking enough fluid to prevent leather skin and constipation, while chewing my 20-30 times a bite. Alas I can say I am not totally a COW ,  as Vegetarian is so not me and meat protein is a big part of my diet. I have increased the vegetarian selection in the house though. My daughter just this week has asked for "NO MORE BLACK BEANS" this week or for a while Please.....
   Well for the NEXT big step  this Cow plans on following up on my to do list and have signed up for a Open water scuba class and will try to get my certification before the end of February. YIPPEE!!! I am so looking forward to this outing. May I not be the put-putting Cow- the bubbles will show who did it!!!! I have gotten to a size 8Long in pants and need a swimsuit to cover the loose spots but a scuba suit will hide all those  areas.( neck to buttocks and inner thighs at least , the boobs remain missing for now!!) 
     May we keep our dedication to the process of learning to eat and avoid the holiday meltdowns- enjoying time with family and friends talking and telling of our plans to come together and apart. LIVE, LAUGH, LOVE !!

     Class given to us today by our wonderful Bariatric group: To start the class assignment I had to list 5 descriptive words to say who I am..., Mother, Daughter, RN,Slave and Crazy were the chosen few. I know!!! what a ragtag bunch I had. Gradually we had to decide which to give up and why was the next question? well all were a problem as I need to take back myself and discover ME so after the 4th time of the exercise guess which one I had Left??? cat got your tongue??? I choose CRAZY, no... not the Psychotic type , just the one who you never know what to expect from or what they will do. I need to learn to embrace this side of myself and use it to define me after years of putting everyone else first- I will define as I have written in the past what I like/ dislike / love / hate ect. In doing this I can be a better Mother, Daughter, RN- Slavery to my food addiction and pleasing others is on the outs for good when I succeed!!! A everlasting process of life as I know it!!!
     The gist of the class was to learn I am worth putting time and effort into to make me a better person . In doing for myself enable me to be there in roles to be for others. As a woman who was under the impression this was selfish to think of myself first was selfishness- A Revolution has begun to take flight. "ME" My first step was getting the bypass  and each little jump , fall try, success is mine to own and revel in everyday.I appreciate the praise and assistance along the way from all my support people and new friends do not misunderstand I am not the "Lone Ranger "by any means , although Tonto's are welcome ( did I age myself or what???) 
     Wishing all bariatric patients the same revelation in their life to KNOW: YOU are worth everything that goes into the process- money time, effort!!!!!
May we enjoy this  journey together.

    Once upon a holiday season they call my name ever so softly ,begging and pleading and making unreal promises as they call......we are okay , one bite..... O, one more chew ,swallow quickly, no one knows.  We give you alertness, energy and more ,just try -you will see...... We never lied , you misunderstood ...you were alert before you dozed, felt drained and confused  ...if only you ate another bite, chewed some more, repeated just a little- We can keep it up... No We never promised a smaller size!!! Just wait to diet until the season ends,  all will be there afterwards and there will be company again as all try to say goodbye to return for the next season...until then we play, eat and sleep for it is the Season for CARBS we say!!!
     If you think this is a fairy tale as it begins with Once upon.... think again. Everyday the carbs call to carb addicts like me!!! I am still trying to figure out how to have a few carbs- good carbs as needed. They sing so sweetly to me on the 12 hour shift as offices and physicians bring in the great stores to keep their waist  and cupboards clean. All those I know who have never been where we are  DO NOT UNDERSTAND(the elusive draw of carbs).. I eat one bite and the tastebuds and braincells call for more;reality hits and  then of course comes the fall-- bloating , gas, diarrhea and feeling awful. Friends all talk about waiting until the temptation and holidays are over to take such caution. Friends want to feel like we are all eating the same ( calories do not count if all eat together...RIGHT???) We will work out , starve, REPENT later.  I must remind myself as I remind all who read this - There will always be another holiday , another season For all who  are company at the gym will only be available between times of remorse for  companionship for they too listen to the call of the seasons. Bikini, dating, summer, ect.... 
                                        Enjoy wisely