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Lap Band 5/03
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Hey!
Tis good to be back on the "band" wagon again....
I lost over 100# the first year...had problems with my band being too tight......didn't receive good after care...was wasting my $$.....then denied my band and didn't deal with it properly.... Fear of success crept in...Fear of men...couldn't stuff things with food...so I choose to work hard and keep myself completely busy immersing myself in my job, my child, friends, my business and helping others...I have resolved to finally "get real" with myself and be truthful, honest and be true to the longings of my heart and follow through on this journey ...& finally..…. be kind & loving to me!
I look forward to getting to know you all ~ you who have walked the walk and know the struggles, pain of the past …and know the victories…Cheers to being real & to the journey of the heart!

 

 

 

 

 
 
Godzbutterfly's Blog



~ Band to VSG? ~
on May 8, 2007 6:35 am
Went to two different doctors for direction with my band...had oodles of tests....conclusion: band has to come out as I have major ulcers all the way up & down the insides of me....the starting of cancer if I do not  have it removed.
I was ready to have the band removed without a replacement back up tool......I am radically blessed as I have a wonderful boyfriend who's ex brother in law is a bariatric surgeon. Met him on Easter and have had my second opinion with him. He suggested I have the VSG. 
More food for thought.....
Research, research....checking my heart of hearts what do I want to do....
I thank God my boyfriend is supportive of me and my concerns....my BIGGEST concern is losing the weight too fast and looking like a plush alligator bag....lol, vanity has it's cost. He said we will take care of it together...meaning plastics...needless to say I am not scared of the surgery per say...it is the after affects that scare the bee jeebies out of me. 
I am taking it one step at a time...I have the band removal scheduled for May 18th....yet still toying with the VSG option and just doing the steps that the doctor requires to see where this journey will lead....OK update from 2 days ago....decided to do nothing until I can wrap my head around it totally.....I am going to try to treat my ulcers in a wholisitc fashion & eat better and take it one step at a time....best to stand still for now!
God will direct my steps....that I am sure of!
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Doctor's Appointment
on December 17, 2006 8:03 am
I finally went to a new doctor & well...sometimes ignorance is bliss. 
I was so excited to go and see what he had to say...but alas...it was not what I wanted to hear. He feels that the band is too small...was even in the beginning when I had it put in. He feels it needs to come out. 
I am stubborn...I will learn to live with it! I do not want my friend / enemy out. I cannot gain weight and for that alone I am thankful beyond words!
He wanted to do an upper GI the next day...I was not able to schedule the test until next Friday....so until then..I remain in ignorance bliss *smiles*
If their are no radical problems...I am keeping my friend and will learn to "deal"....if I do need to have it out....not sure what I will do...but...the one thing I rather remain ignorant on is that my insurance will not touch anything to do with the band...so..it will be all out of pocket monies...ughhhh...again...ignorance is bliss at this moment and for that I can smile!!!!  :o)
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~ Out Of Reach ~
on November 18, 2006 7:28 pm

No more words to sing
No more contradicting melody
No more cheap good bye
No more golden lie

Nothing to  defend
Eyes, it is time to learn to cry again.
Drawing out this line
For the millionth time

Behind me I see
A broken world & dead end dreams
I'm out of reach
I'm out of the reach of yesterday
~Fade Away~
And I have changed
I have changed, so on with today.

Following my heart
No where but the honest truth to start
What have I become?
What can I become?

Failure or success
Welcoming the test to prove my love
Growing in my faith
Lord please grant the strength.

Behind me I see
A broken world & dead end dreams
I'm out of reach
I'm out of the reach of yesterday
~Fade Away~
And I have changed
I have changed, so on with today.

Thankfully, I'm breaking free
From all of the chains that are holding me
I never knew how good life can be
So this is peace


I'm out of reach
I'm out of the reach of yesterday
~Fade Away~
And I have changed
I have changed, so on with today.

I'm out of reach
I'm out of the reach of yesterday
~Fade Away~
I see life 
ahead....
Not behind~













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