So sorry I have been gone for so long! I need to be here but life has just been super busy! I am well. I think about you guys and keep meaning to log on here but just can;t seem to get around to it! I will do a better update soon. I seem to have plateaued for a bit. I need to make some more changes but I have developed some of my old habits again to get back on that losing train. I am happy with who I am and what I see but I have not reached my goal yet.
I hope everyone is doing well and I will respond to all 16 of my messages soon I promise!
Take care and don;t forget about me, I promise I have not forgotten about you even though it feels that way!

 I need to send out a special Thank you to Pam, Tanya, Judy and WilBBarbie and all my other friends for your encouragement and support and of course advice. It really has helped me reach the 100 mark. It would have been a lot harder without you all.
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR BEING HERE FOR ME!!!
Tanya

I did it finally!
I went to my appointment last week only to be disappointed because I weighed 251.3. I even offered to strip I was so desperate. Man I just hate myself for getting so caught up in the number game. Anyway, I was down today and am officially 250 pounds or 100 pounds down since June 11, 2007.
I am very happy and very proud of myself. I have been getting so many compliments; people commenting on my butt and people I have hardly spoken to a t work pulling me aside to tell me how amazing I am looking. I am loving every minute of it I have to admit! It is keeping me motivated too.
My appointment with the dietician and surgeon went well. I am low in Vitamin D but here in Saskatoon SK Canada, we don;t get a lot of bright sunny days unless it is also -40 like it was today! I have to take a supplement for awhile but that is pretty minor. The rest of my blood work came back really good so I am happy.
We did determine from my food records that part of the reason my weight loss has slowed is because I am consuming too many colaries in some sneaky ways. I need to cut back on my milk consumption because I only drink it with Cappucino flavored syrup! It's sooo good though but I am  willing to only have it every few days, a good compromise. I also need to eliminate nuts from my diet pretty much altogether. I started eating them to help increase protein but damn they have a lot of fat. It too is a pretty easy change because I never ate nuts ever until I had this surgery. I also can focus a little less on protein which of course tends to be higher in fat and incorporate a little more fruit and veggies.  I am hoping that these little changes will get me loosing more again. I guess it's time for me to start slowing anyway but I got concerned when it slowed too much. I'm not anywhere near done yet!
I will have to get a 350/250 pic on here one of these days. It is amazing to me.....

I posted some new pics tonight that I took yesterday at 14 weeks and 3 days post op. I was comparing them to March of 2007, the last picture of me at my highest weight, 350 and even I can't believe the difference. I have lost weight my whole life and never documented it like this. I am so proud of myself! I have never really felt that way about myself before either when it comes to my weight!It was funny this Christmas because I actually gave my husband the camera and said "here, take a picture of me opening some presents". He just about passed out because I NEVER wanted my picture taken, as I am sure all of you can relate to.
I have 3 pounds to go before I hit the 100 mark, 60 since surgery. I have a surgeon and dietician appointment on January 21st so I am hoping that I can loose another 3 pounds in a little over a week for the appointment. I desperatly want this but should know better than to get hung up on a number because I could be setting myself up for dissappointment when I should be anything but disappointed over my success so far.
It is so funny how old habits really die hard. Over Christmas I did really well keeping the sweets to a minimum except one day.... My husband got a small box of H&H chocolates fro his boss. It had 6 milk chocolates in it and 6 dark chocolates. Over the course of the day I ate all 6 milk chocolates. Every time I ate one I was relieved to not have any reaction to it. However, when bedtime rolled around, I was rolling around in bed too! I was so ill! I wanted to vomit but couldn;t and couldn;t sleep either. The next day I gurgled like crazy and couldn't keep anything down, not fluid not food not pills, nothing. I finally got some crackers in about midnight. What a hard lesson to learn! Of course it makes perfect sense that I would not tolerate 6 chocolates but since when does logic come in to play when it comes to me and food?! I am so happy that I did react that way because I really need a nasty deterant to help me from loosing control. I feel like an alcoholic who just had her first slip. I am sure I will fall again but the important thing is that I get right back up and hopefully learn something from it and carry on. 
One of the most challenging things for me is coping with life's ups and downs and stresses without food. I really have to work on new coping mechanisms this year.
On a good note, my hormones seem to be leveling out somewhat. My weight loss slowed a bit over Christmas and I think this helped. I still sweat at the drop of a hat for no apparant reason at times but my moods are much more mellow. Amen says my husband! I had my Effexor decreased because apparantly too much of it can cause irritability and this of course defeats the purpose since I went on it to help with moods swings!
I will post again when I am a memebr of the 100 pounds club!

It's been a while but Christmas is such a busy time of year! I am home sick today with a nasty cold so I am taking this opportunity to catch up! I am probably sick because I have shopped, wrapped, decorated and baked until I can not stand it anymore!
Baking was a bit of a challenge this year. I made cookies for the family, peanut butter, oatmeal raison, ginger snaps, and off course sugar cookies for my 3 year old to decorate! I tried to stay away from the really 'chocolatey'or fatty cookies like my favorite; shortbread!
I also made a really nice peanut butter trial mix bar that has lots of protein in it. My one splurge was a new recipe; almond bark with dried fruit and white and milk chocolate. I had one tiny piece and it is so rich I definatly had enough!
I had hoped that I would not tolerate chocolate or any sugar very well. Unfortunatly, I seem to be able to eat a small amount of it without any negative reaction. I guess that is good but I fear getting out of control. I am still very motivated this year but I fear that next year my motivation will be low and I will loose control. I hope I have a better handle on my emotional eating by then. I definatly have some work to do before then!
I have a couple good books to read with excercises to help gain control but I still have to make daily food decisions and I do love food!

On a really positive note, I am almost 1/2 way to my goal! I am really encouraged by this! I have reached some mini goals already:
no seat belt extender on the plane
fit in movie theater seat and doctors office chair comfortably
run up and down the stairs
extra room in the tub
put one foot up on knee, almost cross legs
and my favorite; sex is getting even better!

On a not so positive note, my moods are all over the place and my poor husband is taking the brunt of it all! (good thing the sex is good!) From what I have read and been told, my hormones are being produced for a 300 pound body because it can't keep up with the weight loss changes as fast as I am making them. I am on hormone overload! It's not fun to be bitchy for me or my husband.

Speaking of docs, I need to see mine to review my meds etc... because I think I am over medicating myself now that my weight has dropped. I saw the podiatrist last week to modify my orthotic because my knee was out of alignment now that I am down 87 pounds. I also need to see the respirologist this week because my CPAP is drying me out terribly and my mouth is popping open from too much pressure. All good things but a pain in the butt to do especially at Christmas time!

Hope everyone has a good Christmas and keeps their eating to a minimum. I try and tell myself that when the day is over, is it going to matter that I didn't eat that shortbread! I would rather be aroung for 50 more Christmas's!