I posted some new pics tonight that I took yesterday at 14 weeks and 3 days post op. I was comparing them to March of 2007, the last picture of me at my highest weight, 350 and even I can't believe the difference. I have lost weight my whole life and never documented it like this. I am so proud of myself! I have never really felt that way about myself before either when it comes to my weight!
It was funny this Christmas because I actually gave my husband the camera and said "here, take a picture of me opening some presents". He just about passed out because I NEVER wanted my picture taken, as I am sure all of you can relate to.
I have 3 pounds to go before I hit the 100 mark, 60 since surgery. I have a surgeon and dietician appointment on January 21st so I am hoping that I can loose another 3 pounds in a little over a week for the appointment. I desperatly want this but should know better than to get hung up on a number because I could be setting myself up for dissappointment when I should be anything but disappointed over my success so far.
It is so funny how old habits really die hard. Over Christmas I did really well keeping the sweets to a minimum except one day.... My husband got a small box of H&H chocolates fro his boss. It had 6 milk chocolates in it and 6 dark chocolates. Over the course of the day I ate all 6 milk chocolates. Every time I ate one I was relieved to not have any reaction to it. However, when bedtime rolled around, I was rolling around in bed too! I was so ill! I wanted to vomit but couldn;t and couldn;t sleep either. The next day I gurgled like crazy and couldn't keep anything down, not fluid not food not pills, nothing.
I finally got some crackers in about midnight. What a hard lesson to learn! Of course it makes perfect sense that I would not tolerate 6 chocolates but since when does logic come in to play when it comes to me and food?! I am so happy that I did react that way because I really need a nasty deterant to help me from loosing control. I feel like an alcoholic who just had her first slip. I am sure I will fall again but the important thing is that I get right back up and hopefully learn something from it and carry on.
One of the most challenging things for me is coping with life's ups and downs and stresses without food. I really have to work on new coping mechanisms this year.
On a good note, my hormones seem to be leveling out somewhat. My weight loss slowed a bit over Christmas and I think this helped. I still sweat at the drop of a hat for no apparant reason at times but my moods are much more mellow. Amen says my husband!
I had my Effexor decreased because apparantly too much of it can cause irritability and this of course defeats the purpose since I went on it to help with moods swings!
I will post again when I am a memebr of the 100 pounds club!