I weighed in today at 218 pounds.  That's a total of 101 pounds lost since pre-admissions testing.  Staying away from a lot of carbs and exercising got me going again after a long and painful stall.

Another month has gone by... I'm 8 months out and down to 222 - a total of 97 pounds lost since my pre-admissions visit (about 5 days prior to surgery). 

I was at the fair over the last week, and I ran into some people I only see a few times a year.  Most did not recognize me until they saw my kids or husband with me.  The look on their faces was total confusion and then total happiness for me.  I loved it.  I'm blessed to have those kind of people in my life. 

I'm at the point where the journey is getting a little bumpy.  I'm so happy to have lost what I have and to have changed my eating for the better.  However, I still struggle with eating all the right things and not eating when I'm bored or watching TV.  It's a struggle emotionally because I want to be able to eat whatever and not be restricted to only healthy food - like a normal person.  When will I finally come to grips with the fact that I cannot eat like a normal (eat whatever kind of) person.  I will always need to be vigilant about what I eat.  That's not saying I can never have treats, but I definitely can not slip back into the habit of stuffing myself with treats or carbs just because they tast good... or simply because I want to be eating 'something'.

Then there is the body image struggle.  I'm very blessed to have lost almost 100 pounds in such a short amount of time.  I'm very satisfied with my progress in that respect.  Emotionally though, I'm starting to hit the wall.  I feel happy, yet I feel like I'm still so fat...  When only a few weeks ago I was extremely satisfied with how I was looking.  I fear that I'm never going to be completely happy, and that these cycles will continue for the rest of my life.  Can anyone say, "Need therapy!"

Just this weekend, I finally broke down and showed my husband my stomach - the saggy, baggy skin that I see every morning when I bend over to dry my hair.  It was difficult to say if he was getting the point - about how I felt, but he remained positive and supportive.  I'm very luck to have such a wonderful husband.

The bottom line is that I'm happy with the surgery, and I'm happy with my success.  The WOW moments continue to surface at just the right moments - when I need encouragement.  I have a wonderful family and support system.  And I feel great!

A Wow moment... The nurse who takes my BP every week mentioned that I was using a regular cuff now.  She said she was proud of me.  After having been on a plateau for many weeks, I needed to hear that.

Oh one more thing to comment on...  Clothes and sizes!  I seriously need to go shopping.  I hardly have anything to wear these days.  The last time I went shopping, I contemplated checking out the womens/misses sections instead of only the plus sizes, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it.  What was I afraid of... People looking at me and saying that I shouldn't be shopping in those sections... Trying on an XL shirt and not having it fit, which might crush me emotionally... Who knows.  For now, I'm in a size 18 pants, with most of them baggy.  And I've been buying 1X or 14/16 tops.  I'm scared to try on anything smaller.  Hmmm....

I think I'll take my official 8 month pics tonight and get them posted - even if I'm not looking my best today.

I just weighed in at 222.  The plateau has been busted.  YEAH!  I cut out the excess carbs, got back on the treadmill, and that seemed to do the trick.  I wanted to be at 219 by the 18th (3 days away), but I might not make it.  That would put me at 100 pounds lost in 8 months (or since pre-op admissions).

Working at it!

I weighed in at the doctor's office yesterday.  I was a bit disappointed that I've only lost a pound - weighing in at 228.  My goal this week is to watch the carbs and only allow myself cereal for breakfast (because of the fiber and omegas), meats/cheese/salad for lunch, meat/veggie for dinner, protein supplements and one serving of a 'treat' if necessary.

I'm on vacation starting later today.  It's always a challenge to stay on track when I'm camping!