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                    Salutations. Welcome to my profile page. No bells and whistles over here, people. You looking for all THAT jazz, hit MYSPACE. 
                       Here, all you'll get is pure, 
                                                            unadulterated, 
                                                                              happy-go-lucky...
                                                     MICHAEL. 
                     Feel free to click on "recent posts" to see what I'm all about. It's safe to say that my posts are a good representation of....well....me! I don't rock the boat, I'm a friend to all and I keep my cards on the table at all times. I like to inject humor in my writings--and I'll give any and everyone all the encouragement they might need in whatever they might need it in (provided it's something I agree with, mind you--let's not get it twisted!!).  I truly hope we can learn something from each other in our interaction together--time will tell. 
Michael X.'s Blog



As promised...
on May 19, 2008 1:16 pm
The conversation between Cap and Peter:

(Preface: Young hot heads go in above their heads to confront another group of young hot heads--One of the hot heads on the OTHER side of the law doesn't care and takes out a large part of "Connecticut" with an elementary school nearby, killing countless THOUSANDS. The Government steps in, stating that they've had ENOUGH. From this point on, every super-powered being must REGISTER with the government, revealing their identities. Failure to do so is now BREAKING THE LAW. Of course, some of the heroes agree, while others don't. Both sides have excellent reasons why. Cap already works for the government--so, naturally--they assume that he's down with them

THEY'RE WRONG.

CIVIL WAR begins. Hero against hero, friend against friend.
Cap and Peter start on opposing sides. Peter later jumps ship, realizing his mistakes. He meets with Cap, asking WHY he fights AGAINST what he's SUPPOSED to stand for: THE LAW.)

Cap begins by quoting Samuel Clemens and rephrasing it afterwards. This is part the conversation:

"...In a republic, who is 'the Country'?

Is it the government, which is for the moment in the saddle?
Why, the government is merely a temporary servant; it cannot be it's prerogative to determine what is right and what is wrong and decide who is a patriot and who isn't. It's function is to obey orders, not originate them.
Who then, is 'the country'?  
Is it the newspaper? Is it the pulpit?
Why, these are mere parts of the country, not the whole of it; they have not command, they only have their little share in the command.
In a monarchy, the King and his family are the country; in a republic, it is the common voice of the people. Each of you, for himself, by himself   and of his own responsibility must speak.
It is a solemn and weighty responsibility and not lightly to be flung aside at the bullying of pulpit, press, government or the empty catchphrases of politicians.
Each must, for himself alone, decide what is right and what is wrong and which course is patriotic and which isn't. You cannot shirk this and be a man.
To decide it AGAINST your convictions is to be an unqualified and inexcusable traitor--both to yourself and to your country, let men label you as they may.
If you alone of all the nation shall decide one way and that way be the right way according to your convictions of the right, you have done your duty by yourself and your country. Hold up your head. You have nothing to be ashamed of."

Cap's interpretation:

"Doesn't matter what the PRESS says.
 Doesn't matter what the politicians or the mobs say.
 Doesn't matter if the whole COUNTRY decides that something WRONG is something RIGHT.

This nation was founded on one principle above all else:

The requirement that we stand up for what we believe, no matter the odds or the consequences.

When the mob and the press and the WHOLE WORLD tell you to move, your job is to plant yourself like a tree beside the river of truth and tell the WHOLE WORLD--

--NO,
YOU  MOVE."
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So many thoughts....
on May 17, 2008 9:14 pm

lately, I've wanted to post a MULTITUDE of blogs--just haven't had the time.

I'm lying.

I haven't had the DESIRE.

(and to be honest, I don't have it NOW, either. However--I need to release--and what better way to do so? Either I beat up the keyboard or I beat up someone else. Sure, one feels SO MUCH BETTER than the other, but one is ALSO more therapeutic! --DON'T YOU WISH YOU KNEW. )

Let's get a few of the thoughts outta the way though--some are already lost forever, which is a CRIME. Forgive me. Here goes:

1.) You mothers out there--Y'all KILL me. Cee and I accompanied Munch to a birthday party today that took place in a large park. I'm sitting on the benches paying OH SO MUCH attention to the parenting skills (or lack thereof) of the parents around me. A mother beside me calls her child over and they engage in a brief conversation, the majority of it revolving around it being time to go. Of course, the child wants to stay. it is EVIDENT that the MOTHER on the other hand, has had her fill of the park and WANTS TO GO.

But she's a mother.

Despite HER feelings (I'm telling you--it really was evident!!) she says to her son: "Okay, five more minutes" and he runs off to play.

(Cee is GOOD for that!

"Okay, Munch--five more minutes!!")

Five more minutes is NEVER five more minutes--it's always a good ten or fifteen. And I ALWAYS want to leave the park--So me? I get all excited and shit! 'Cause now there's a DEADLINE!!

Alas--it's NEVER "five more minutes".

(Mothers!)

Father's on the other hand? When WE'RE at the park and we say "five more minutes"?

.............................You BEST BELIEVE you've got THREE.

...and ONLY three.

okay--one thought out. How long can I keep this up? About how many do I have?

 

Cee graduated with her Masters Degree in Social Work this past Wednesday. Although she was fully aware of it and has been for the past year or so, I think it hit her AFTER the actual ceremony. She stepped out of the auditorium, where her mom, stepfather, dad, Munch and I were waiting and burst into tears.

Yea--that's when it hit.

Over the past 5 years or so, Cee has realized a LOT about herself.

I feel bad.

I feel bad because she comes to these realizations, and she gets so excited!! She comes to me....as if for validation...and I never think that I respond the way she'd like me to. I truly believe that she wants me to share in her joy--and I DO. I TRULY do.

But she comes to these realizations--and when she does, and she brings them to my attention,  I find it...difficult to be or act SURPRISED. And I tell her:

"Carmen--I knew you were capable of (whatever) ALL ALONG...

...YOU were the only one who doubted yourself."

( I really need to improve my...bedside manner. But i'm sorry...it wasn't news to me!)

(Remember in "Unbreakable" when we find out that Mr Glass is to blame for all the horrific acts? I've seen that movie a MILLION times. When we find that part out--I don't get surprised EACH AND EVERY TIME...because I ALREADY KNOW.)

it's the same thing. It may be news to you, Cee--but I'm sorry--I knew it all along.

Congratulations, Cee. I knew it all along.

Two thoughts out...Hold on...I'm about to jump around here..I'm trying to identify the source of my discontent, so I'll be hitting all targets--don't say you weren't warned.

......Oh. Stress ISN'T ALWAYS BAD. There is GOOD stress as well. I learned that many moons ago. You could have a lot of positive things happening all at once--and it could very well be STRESSING YOU OUT. Please keep this in mind.

....Captain America became my favorite superhero in the time it took me to read THREE pages.

Three.

He simply told another WHY he did what he did on a daily basis. ...and I felt that shit. (Someone PLEASE remind me to post that conversation!!) It was Spider-Man--and it was during.......?.....CIVIL WAR. They were just chillin' on a roof top--Peter had come to him for advice because he was beginning to realize that he had chosen the wrong side and he HATED himself for it. He hated what he had DONE. He hated that he gone against his beliefs.

So Cap tells him a story. More like WHY he's fighting. WHY he fights.

...and he finishes....and Peter has this LOOK on his face.

(This is a COMIC--how the artist captured it is AMAZING.)

...and he says something to Cap like "Can I carry your books to school for you for the rest of the year?"

And I remember feeling......that I probably would've said THE EXACT SAME THING.

DON'T GIVE UP YOUR BELIEFS. NO MATTER WHAT. PLEASE.

Three thoughts out--I can feeling it getting closer--I'm almost there.

(I WILL post that conversation. I actually typed it out and posted it in my office--I read it the other day and got the SAME FEELING I got when I read it the VERY FIRST time.)

My little brother's having a baby. I couldn't be happier.

I COULD NOT BE HAPPIER.

I already laid down the law--I couldn't care less what the situation is with shorty--that child is RIGHTFULLY my niece/nephew. "Let shorty know!!"

Anyway...His ex didn't take it very well. Not well at all.

TOUGH.

As a result, she made a rather...disparaging comment. One that I'm ASHAMED to relay. I'm actually EMBARRASSED to admit to you all that I've ALREADY relayed it. I feel EQUALLY as guilty for doing JUST that.

..............I can't even continue with this conversation. I want to verbally lash out in ways I seldom do. Yes--writing is a release for me--however words can't describe how I feel in regards to this.

I am evil in ways UNKNOWN. My MOTHER can attest to this.

I am evil in ways UNKNOWN. My MOTHER can attest to this.

I am evil in ways UNKNOWN.       My MOTHER can attest to this.

UNKNOWN.  I am unaware of what I'm even capable of.

(laughter)

---You...

...you didn't think..............

you DID, didn't you?

...When I said that I was "evil in ways unknown" YOU thought that I meant that YOU didn't know!!

(laughter)

I  do not know.

am unaware of how EVIL I can be.

I keep surprising MYSELF.

(i can just IMAGINE what I'm cooking up this time around--"that marvelous shit to get your mouth waterin'"

Anyway...If it wasn't you, TOUGH. If you hate the parties involved because it wasn't you, TOUGH.

But there's a LIMIT.

a limit. a limit. a limit. a limit. a limit. a limit. a limit. a limit. a limit. a limit.

THERE IS A LIMIT.

So--for all of you that might be out there--hating the fact that IT JUST ISN'T / WASN'T YOU and you have the overwhelming URGE to spew HATE out of those mouths of yours:

You're ALL cum-drinking whores and you like to get fucked by animals.**

Don't mess with me or mine.

...and these are just thoughtsWORDS.

IMAGINE me in the flesh.

Steele (my little brother) is too kind. THAT, of course--is what makes him Steele. I'm not so lucky. I'm the one with the curse. Only I LIKE mine.

Another thought out .....and wouldn't you know it? I feel SO much better. There's more--a lot more. However, Too much time has passed since beginning this post and now. My SINCERE apologies to those of you that might have been offended. I made an attempt to censor my thoughts, unfortunately, the method I chose was as far as I was willing to go.

My apologies to those of you that may have seen a side of me that you were unaware of. If you've been around, you'll see that I've admitted MANY TIMES that the Michael here online is but a GLIMPSE of the real deal. I have issues. AND PAPERS TO PROVE IT.

(jokes.)

Good night--I feel better! I sure hope YOU do!! 

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Don't Go Breaking my Heart..(There's still hope)
on April 27, 2008 4:33 pm
"Breaking My Heart" Lil' Wayne/Lil' Brother--(w/ interpolations, of course):

...How many ways can I say I'm done fishin'?
I wanted you for the role and you smashed the audition!!
Havin' a partner for a man in my position--
eliminates the cooks in the kitchen!!

Still, I got a taste for:
                  that fast food
                             foreign cars
                                    many women...

(And some say it's the life I was given)

I say it don't matter if I work at Mickey-D's...
I got a fix for more than what you got between ya knees--

It could be a new broad, you're still my number one...
(Every once and again I still like havin' some fun.)

No disrespect intended, but what's done is done!
(Women step out for love, men do it to cum!)

I'm not a playa like Pun-- 
but when shorties get to grabbin' on me--
...the last thought I get is "Michael run!!"

To them girls wishin' on a star, this might stun...
But I ALWAYS tell it like it is hon--
--one.

[Chorus: x2]
..She say she loves me, won't leave me, won't ever let me go--
But if you're thinkin' 'bout leaving you need to let me know!!
We're better together than further apart, 
so darlin' don't go breakin' my heart...

...We were high school sweethearts, 
talkin' since we was teens--
Every morning,
...every ev-e-ning...
Fourteen years later, she eatin' that mean cuisine...
I'm on the field, straight gone off that creatine!!

...In the NFL 
(which means "Not For Long.")
City to city, all the groupies they hop along...
Word got back to wifey, she was like "Stop the song--
I'm takin' the kids to your mommas, I'm out, I'm gone."
                                        (WHOA!!!)
My momma was like;
                  "Baby, now I hate to see your tears...
                   But I've been with his daddy for 'bout 35 years...
                   And in my day I had to turn a blind eye to cheating...
                   But I ain't never had to wear no black eye from beatings--
                   As long as he doing right, by you and your kids...
                   How you gon' expect that man not to be who he is?
                    I ain't sayin' that it's right --
                   but we often pay the price--
                   Cause while YOUR life is love, 
                             HIS love is life.
                   And he gon' live it to the fullest,
                   and I ain't tryna pull you down-- 
                   or sound--                  
                   like a broken record--
But you should know by now that all men are dogs--
Better to have a rich pit then a broke german shepard."

[Chorus: x2]
She say she love me, won't leave me, won't ever let me go...
But if you're thinkin' of leaving you need to let me know...
We're better together than further apart, so darlin'--
..
Don't go breakin' my heart!!

[Verse 3: Lil Wayne]
I said I don't have nothin' if I don't have you.

(Like Sade, we've got the "Sweetest Taboo.")

And my game is skin deep, 
                                                  (like your first tattoo.)
I gets all in ya head.. 
                                                   (just like shampoo!)

I just wanna fuck with you like rude po-lices.
But I don't want a broken heart...because I'll lose the pieces.

Hey, girl--don't. play. with. my. gangsta!!
And have this boy blue like a "Power Ranger."

(And I know cheaters never get crowned--
So I try to play "fair" like roller coasters and clowns.)

You gotta hold ya soldier down!!
Even when the war is lookin' like-
it is right-
around the corna--
And you don't wa-nna,
                                         --leave me, 
                                                              --believe me
---Cause I could turn you on 
(like a personal TV.)
It's Young Weezy, 
I know what ya thought!!
But I'm just here to play my part- 
...so don't go breakin' my heart.

[Chorus x2: Lil Wayne First, Lil Brother Second]
She say she love me, won't leave me, won't ever let me go.
But if you're thinkin' of leaving you need to let me know.
We better together then further apart, so darlin' don't go breakin' my heart.

Every once in awhile--I make the decision to give up on Hip-Hop--(knowing DAMN WELL that it won't last.)
This brought me back this time. Honesty isn't Taboo it seems. 
I guess I'm still a card-carrying member.
There's still hope!!

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Borrowed...(without permission)
on April 25, 2008 4:02 am

"Today was Bring Your Kid to Work Day. I don't have kids and can't afford a child actor, so I had to do my normal stuff while all the parents took the day off to play. I never went to work with my parents when I was a kid. They were both teachers, so I felt like I pretty much knew what they did since I was sitting in school every day. I mentioned to someone that I thought people without kids should get an extra day of vacation since none of the parents were getting work done, but she didn't respond, so I'm pretty sure she's just bitter about not having kids. The toughest thing about Bring Your Kid to Work Day was that I work with a lot of young looking people, so I would have to look at them a few times to figure out if they were co-workers or kids. It makes things awkward since you're not supposed to stare at other people's kids or your young looking co-workers."

I lifted this from the...(owner? webmaster?) of "Steepandcheap.com", a site where I get most of my extreme sports gear from--this guy is HILARIOUS. He has DEFINETELY missed his calling. I WISH I could post as often as he does--and he does so DAILY--for no reason at all!! All he simply needs to do is tell us what we may find for the day, but instead--he gives us these little bits of information--HILARITY ENSUES. EVERY DAY. If you know of any extreme sports people looking for breaks on gear, (camping even!) check out this site! As a matter of fact, there are LOTS of these sites--tailored to whatever your fancy might be. Why aren't you using these sites?
DON'T BREAK THE BANK on your gear!! ESPECIALLY IF YOU"VE UNDERGONE WLS!! (You KNOW clothes are cheaper!! something about "less fabric used" or something like that!!)

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"That’s it" or "Encylopedia Explanation"
on April 20, 2008 2:05 am

Good Morning, Everyone.

Encyclopedia Brown. Not familiar with the name? You can't be serious!! How could you not? Didn't the author of the "Encyclopedia Brown" series of books win a Caldecott Medal many years ago? (What's that? You don't know what the Caldecott Medal is? SHAME ON YOU!)

(Do not despair. I forgot exactly what it was myself--No matter! it's 2008!! GOOGLE IT!!)

Anyway, Donald J. Sobol was the author of the entire "Encyclopedia Brown" series of books. There were SO MANY. I believe that I read them ALL. It pains me that there are movies about these OTHER cats (The Hardy Boys, their female counterpart--what was her name?) and NONE of ENCYCLOPEDIA BROWN!! Come on!! BUGS MEANY?  he would've been the BEST!! I could see ANTHONY HOPKINS playing  BUGS MEANY. Nevermind that they were all teenagers! Who cares! Oh--and Encyclopedia could be played by JOHNNY DEPP!

(Who am I kidding--Encyclopedia Brown isn't "dark" enough for Johnny Depp!!)

I'D play Encyclopedia Brown!! (Hey, if they could make the KINGPIN & NICK FURY into African-American characters, why can't they do the same for Encyclopedia Brown?!?!  I'd take Encyclopedia Brown to NEW HEIGHTS.

YOU HAVE NO IDEA.

He had a love interest!

(I think I'm lying--but hey, If I'M starring in the full-length feature film, I'LL NEED A LOVE INTEREST!!!)

(Off topic--GO AND DOWNLOAD J. HOLIDAY's ALBUM. NOW! LEGALLY!) (I don't believe that I have to add that!! and we'll be signing up J. Holiday for the Soundtrack!!)

Where was I?

Oh yes. LOVE INTEREST.

(no--you STILL don't know who Encyclopedia Brown is, do you? I'm WHETTING YOUR APPETITE--it's called SUSPENSE. Have patience!! Cheese and rice!!*)

Love interest? Beyonce!

(psyche!) SO not my style.

(off topic part two: J.holiday's album is REALLY on point. Why does "SUFFOCATE" fit the bill at this point in time?)

(...and don't you hate when the name of the song is hardly what YOU think it is? I thought it was "Can't Breathe..."  he says that SO MANY MORE times than "Suffocate"!! Okay--I'm sorry--back to Encylopedia!!)

Love interest--someone...NOT run of the mill. A...singer! a stunningly BEAUTIFUL singer. and the best thing about it--she wouldn't sing not ONE NOTE for the ENTIRE LENGTH OF THE FULL-LENGTH FEATURE FILM.

(Suspense, remember?)

I don't even want the singer to sing BACKGROUND during the CREDITS.

(Yea--that's it.) Can you see it?

I CAN.

okay--enough suspense.

Encyclopedia Brown was a teenager. Nothing spectacular. Skinny little kid. No powers, No secret laBORatory (you have to say it like that--la-BORE-ah-tore-ee") No bells and whistles of ANY kind. Encyclopedia's REAL name was Leroy Brown**. Small little scrawny white kid, not a smart-aleck by any means. just PLAIN Leroy "Encyclopedia" Brown.

He rode--

SALLY!

Sally was the name of his...

...oh damn. She WASN'T his love interest!!! she was more like his BODYGUARD!! I remember!! she would stand up to BUGS MEANY!!!

No matter!! Suspense, remember? It'll draw the crowds in!!

Encyclopedia and Sally will be like Sam and Diane!!

Tony and Angela!!

Jay and Beyonce!!

(scratch the last two--they got hitched too soon!)

Encyclopedia and Sally will start to grow on each other in part 4!! 

(START to grow!! )

START
. The female star will have equal billing rights and she HAS to sign on for EVERY movie. (sure, I actually LIKED the NEW lady in the "Silence of the Lambs"*** series--but how often does THAT happen?)

Where was I again? oh yeah!

Anyway--he rode around town on his bike, solving the local mysteries.

That's it.

As a matter of fact, Encyclopedia Brown was MacGuyver as a kid. That's it!

(no--not REALLY. but picture it.)

No bells and whistles, no super-model look--NOTHING SPECTACULAR.

He rode around town solving neighborhood mysteries. He had his own little mystery solving business. JUST HIM. (Sally would help out every once in awhile.)

No talking dogs.

No energy-enhancing vegetables.

No secret life as a rock star.

Just plain ol' Leroy "Encyclopedia" Brown.

(Is it just me, or did you just see the trailer?: "No talking dogs, No energy-enhancing vegetables, no secret life as a rock star...Just plain ol' Leroy "Encyclopedia" Brown."

"COMING SOON."

(stay tuned--watch me come up with the poster!!)

WHERE WAS I?!?!?!

As a kid--I was INTRIGUED by Encyclopedia Brown...Just for the simple fact that he was so-----------plain.

Not trying to fit in, not into the girls, not into his "look" or where he stood in the world. He found his niche and he was THERE. That's all he did. You had a mystery? Call Encyclopedia. His father (it's all coming back to me now!!) was THE CHIEF OF POLICE in their small town. NO ONE got away with ANYTHING because the MASTERMIND of the town was a KID.

Encyclopedia Brown was a BAD MOTHERFUCKER.

(I'm  laughing my ass off right now--you gotta see me!!)

That's it! Donald J. Sobol penned an ENTIRE SERIES of Encyclopedia Brown books and I wore out MANY a library card reading EVERY. SINGLE. ONE. Each book had about ten mysteries, leaving you stumped at the end of each story.

(I'm laughing and CRYING at the same time now.--EVERTHING IS STARTING TO MAKE SENSE NOW.)

At the end of each story, Encyclopedia always found out who the culprit was.  Then, the reader was asked "HOW?" . At the end of the BOOK, was a detailed explanation as to what clues Encyclopedia used to solve the mystery. The DRAW to me was that NOTHING was hidden. All the clues were given in the story and revealed to you in the explanation.

So--first--I just liked Encyclopedia for who he was.

Second--I liked the whole "mystery" aspect.

THEN--I got hooked into PAYING ATTENTION TO THE DETAILS.

Jumping to the back of the book was no longer fun to me--I didn't want to be told HOW Encyclopedia solved the mystery--I wanted to solve it MYSELF.

The clues were in the story!!!

and if I simply paid attention to EVERYTHING, I could solve them too.

(I'm crying right now--I kid you not.)

...if I simply paid attention to EVERYTHING I could solve them too.

AND I BEGAN TO.

(you have NO IDEA how much MONEY I owe to the Mount Vernon Public Library. you have NO IDEA how many times I got in TROUBLE because my mom had to pay for overdue books. You have no idea how I couldn't explain to my mom why I STILL had these books!)

"Junior!! you can read!! Why haven't you read those books yet?!!!! Why do you beg me to bring you to the library, start reading the books before we even GET TO THE CAR, yet FAIL TO FINISH THEM?!?!?!"

I wanted to tear the last section of the book OFF of each and every one. but I couldn't--they didn't belong to me. So, I'd read ONLY the mysteries, over and over again, until I solved the mysteries.

MYSELF.

(Good Ol' Encyclopedia Brown.)

Years later--I worked as a Psychiatric Rehabilitation Counselor at a halfway house for the mentally ill. With an uncanny ability it seems, to be able to pinpoint when a client had began to deteriorate. (mentally) I never knew why! There's nothing special about Michael! I saw after awhile, though--especially after it was brought to my attention--that I seemed to have a knack for...

...paying attention to detail.

EVERY detail.

EVERY detail.

(Good Ol' Encyclopedia Brown!)

A couple of weeks ago, I took babygirl to the library to get her very first library card. (It was Daddy-Daughter-Doggy Day!!) She had been ON her mother and I to take her--and I remember doing the same with MY mom. She was SO happy. Imagine MY happiness. Taking my daughter to the SAME library I went to as a kid.

and it hadn't changed a BIT.

(Well, except for the computers)

...It hadn't changed a bit.

So--we're there--and she's SO excited!! and all she wanted to know was HOW MANY WAS SHE ALLOWED TO BORROW.

(and you KNOW she took exactly THAT MANY.)

(I love you, AmberStorm.)

SO--we're looking.

and I see "ENCYCLOPEDIA BROWN."

and it was like I opened the book and the entire world got sucked up into it!!!

(I tried to explain it to Am, but she couldn't have cared less--if it ain't about the teen with the rock star alter ego or the other teen with ESP, she ain't trying to hear it!!)

BUT YOU KNOW I SUBSITUTED TWO OF HER BOOKS FOR TWO OF ENCYCLOPEDIA BROWN'S!!!

(never got around to reading them--and since then--they've gone back. However, I'll be back for 'em!!)

Amber and I constantly go over her homework--and she'll tell you--PRIOR TO our library trip--PRIOR TO me remembering all about Encyclopedia--I've been telling her the SAME THING.

ALWAYS pay attention to detail.

That's it. A special shout-out to Mr. Donald J. Sobol. Thank You. If you never recieved a Caldecott Medal, I'll get right on seeing how you CAN.

And another EXTRA SPECIAL Shout-out to the individual who provided the inspiration for this entry. I now know that I have to be inspired to write--you've provided me with MORE THAN ENOUGH inspiration. Thank you.

Paying attention to details: didja notice the asterisks? you know what they mean don't you? more importantly, did you pay attention to the CLUES?

(If you noticed no clues, they weren't meant for you!!)

(if you noticed "obvious" ones, they were coffee grounds****)!!!!

 

*--my mother didn't like when I used the Lord's name in vain. when I found this out, it was too late, I had already begun. I picked this up in my readings--what does it sound like? I say this instead. In rememberance of my mom.

**--Go to Youtube and enter this name: "Leroy Jenkins" into the search engine. (try adding "WoW" to it to make sure you get what i'm speaking of). This is HILARIOUS. I have a special vein of "internet humor" that goes over the heads of a large part of the general public who don't explore it like so many others (and I). Do yourself a favor and try NEVER to pull a "Leroy Jenkins"

***--YOU do the research. I forgot both of their names! I refused to watch it after the first actress jumped ship--but I was such a fan that I couldn't resist--I actually LIKED the second one!! (actress, I mean.) Anyway--I said it was the "Silence of the Lambs" series---I BELIEVE it should be referred to as the "Manhunter" series, since this was first. WAITAMINNIT? That was the guy playing the HULK!!)

****---Coffee grounds. (A result of too much tv!!) Coffee grounds, as I've seen, are what drug dealers (in the movies!!) use to mask the scent of drugs so that the drug sniffing dogs can't locate them. So, whenever I need to "throw someone off" of a trail that I've "left behind", I'll say "coffee grounds". Sue me! 

it's 6 minutes to 5!!! Didja see what time I started? Cheese and rice!!!

(notice how I never told you WHY he was named "Encyclopedia"? Despite the fact that it's SO obvious, why not find out for yourself?)

 

 

 

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My Story

Hello all, and welcome...to my profile. As you can see, I've been a member of OH since May 1st, 2006 and up until today, have NOT added ANY info to my profile, DESPITE numerous requests to do so. For those of you that suggested, you have my sincere apologies--I'm now aware that my journey may give encouragement to others, and for that reason, I've finally decided to contribute. Now...how does one go about doing so?
                         My situation with my weight isn't one that has plagued me for my entire life. It wasn't until the last 4 years or so when it became...out of control, for lack of a better term. In retrospect, I now see that my weight had always been tied to my emotional state. Why I failed to see that earlier is STILL a mystery. Nevertheless, I'm aware of it NOW--and I have made it an ISSUE to be aware of it from now on. My weight was never really problematic for me--even health-wise, I can't really say that I suffered as a result. Of course, things are better now, but if I were to say that I had specific health complications, (ones I was aware of, that is) I'd be misleading you. Socially--My weight didn't deter me from anything or anyone -- and physically, I STILL set out to do whatever I wanted to do. HOWEVER--again, I'd be misleading if I sounded as if everything was "peaches and cream" because it truly wasn't--but this, you have to understand, is my reporting AFTER my weight loss surgery. 
                       The day before my surgery was my highest weight : 329 lbs. (This was because I subconsciously aspired to EAT EVERYTHING IN SIGHT after being given a surgery date!) At the time, my weight hovered at or around 310 or so. I had always been of a stocky nature, so I never saw myself as really being "overweight", per se.
                      Weight loss to me wasn't really something that I failed at. Keeping it off for an extended period of time was what proved to be most difficult. At one time, the most I lost was about 80 lbs, all through diet and exercise--and I would follow the same routine--go shopping, slowly pack the weight back on, lose it, go shopping again. (who am I kidding? I shopped all the time!)  However, no matter what the scale had to say, I still set out to live my life to the fullest, and I can safely say that nothing has changed since then.
                     I opted to undergo the surgery simply because: 
a.) I was getting older and losing the weight had gotten more and more difficult as time passed, 

b.)The amount of "free time" I had that I once utilized to go to the gym had decreased drastically since the birth of my baby girl and... 

c.) a close friend of mine had undergone the surgery and I was COMPLETELY AMAZED by the outcome. Yes, it was a drastic measure (especially for someone who had no problem losing weight before) but then again, I'd been KNOWN to take drastic measures, so I decided to throw my hat into the ring. I applied, was approved and before I knew it, I was dry heaving in between "laps" of the hospital floor. 
                         I'd be lying if I reported any major complications--within 4 months, I had lost 100 lbs., and it was THEN that I realized how the weight had a negative effect on my health. Since then--I've made a personal promise to self to adhere to my "new" lifestyle. For me, my loved ones and...fashion designers, one day sales, clothing outlets...(you get the picture, don't you?!)
                    
                        Okay--I'm currently a social worker, working with the homeless, substance abusing population. This is only what I do for 40 SET HOURS a week. Friday at 5 o'clock is when I forget EVERYTHING associated with the job, and Monday at 9 o'clock is when I start to remember (and I DO MEAN  "start to remember"!!) My lifestyle has always been one that has been quite active and i'm a TRUE BELIEVER in having a life OUTSIDE of a career. I keep active mainly because I HAVE to. (My mother attributes it to the West Indian blood flowing through these veins--if that is true, it's of no concern to me--it's how I've always been and how I'll stay for as long as I'm able.) I have TOO MANY hobbies and activities that range from being a graphic artist, to an aspiring actor (I'm out of retirement!) a jack of all trades, shopaholic, snowboarder, a writer, technological geek, full time student, full time father, etc.... All of which I did even PRIOR TO my weight loss surgery. The weight loss I've undergone this FINAL TIME AROUND hasn't CHANGED my life, you see--I would say it's ENHANCED it to a certain extent, but for the most part, I'm still Michael, just in disguise.

 


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